Cycle 20 - Flashcard Set 2
What disorder is characterized by interpersonal conflict?
Borderline personality disorder (BPD)
Why is it important not to engage in drama with someone with BPD during conflict?
Because when someone with BPD is triggered, their brain operates like a very young child, and engaging in drama can escalate the situation
What should you do instead of engaging in drama during conflict with someone who has BPD?
Set firm boundaries and be clear about the kind of behavior you will tolerate and won’t tolerate
What is an example of setting a firm boundary during conflict with someone who has BPD?
Saying ‘I won’t tolerate threats. I won’t tolerate name-calling.’
What should you do if a conflict with someone who has BPD is going in circles and not getting anywhere?
Take the time to disengage and give yourself and the other person time to cool off
What should you say to the person with BPD if you need to take a break during a conflict?
I need a break right now. I’m going to take two hours. I’m not leaving you or abandoning you. I’ll come back and we can have this conversation
Why is it important to let the person with BPD know that you are coming back after taking a break during a conflict?
Because people with BPD are sensitive to being abandoned, and if you just leave without explanation, it can escalate the situation
How long might someone with BPD need before they are ready to talk after a conflict?
They might need anywhere from a few hours to a full 24 hours, depending on how triggered they are
What should you do if you force a conversation with someone with BPD before they are ready to talk?
It can make the situation worse, so it’s important to be patient and wait until they are ready
What should you do if someone with BPD is having a big feeling during a conflict?
Be empathetic and acknowledge that they are hurting, without trying to rationalize or dismiss their feelings
What is an example of a trigger that might cause someone with BPD to become upset during a conflict?
A therapist looking at the clock while talking to them, which might be interpreted as a sign of being hated and unwanted
What are some tips for handling conflict with someone who has BPD?
Set firm boundaries, avoid drama, give yourself and the other person time to cool off, be empathetic, and be patient
