Klicker- Funeral Service Psychology and Counseling Flashcards
The study of human behavior. A complex science of understanding how and why individuals react to certain stimuli or conditions.
Psychology
The study of human behavior as it relates to funeral service.
- Not a new or uniquely different discipline- a combination of general psychology, grief therapy and counseling, the psychology of grief and bereavement, and general counseling.
Funeral Psychology
- Needs a thorough understanding of grief and bereavement because the general public has a more in-depth knowledge of the subject.
- Must be familiar with the purpose and techniques of counseling
The Funeral Director
- Confidant
- Counselor (debatable)
- Advisor
- Caregiver
Nature of the Relationship betwen the Funeral Director and Clients
Involves assisting clients to better understand themselves and how to cope with their problems.
- Counselor brings empathy and specific helping skills to guide clients into exploring their feelings and values, understanding their problems, making choices, and iplementing changes in thoughts, affect and behavior. (do not tell clients how they ought to live their lives)
The Helping Process
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Exploration Stage
- Phase 1
- Phase 2
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Insight Stage
- Phase 3
- Phase 4
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Action Stage
- Phase 5
- Phase 6
- Phase 7
Hill and O’Brien’s 3-Stage Model Combined with Wolfelt’s Phases in a Helping Relationship
The family notifies the funeral home of the death and asks the funeral director to handle arrangements.
- This is in actuality a “cry for help.”
Exploration Stage
Phase 1: The client and funeral director enter into a helping relationshp.
The extent of the relationship moves from basic to helping as rapport develops between the funeral director and the family.
- Cannot occur if the family does not perceive the funeral director as empathic, warm, respectful, and genuine. The funeral Director projects these traits by showing concern, caring, and a willingness to assist the family however is necessary.
Exploration Stage
Phase 2: The building of a helping relationship
Though active listening and skillful questioning, the funeral director gathers information about the deceased, and the family’s needs, wishes, and feelings. He then explains the options available to them.
Insight Stage
Phase 3: Exploration and assistance in helping the family understand their alternatives.
After explaining and clairifying all options, the funeral director assists the family in planning a funeral that meets their needs.
Insight Stage
Phase 4: Consolidation and Planning
The funeral director implements the plan desired by the family, whether the plan calls for a direct disposition or a funeral that involves visitation, viwing, and a committal service.
Action Stage
Phase 5: Implementation and action.
Wolfelt suggests that funeral directors assist the family with a sense of closure such as joining them in the fellowship that often follows the funeral.
Action Stage
Phase 6: Conclusion of the Funeral Process
This is known in most funeral homes as “aftercare”.
Action Stage
Phase 7: Post Funeral Follow-Up
An emotion of group of emotions caused by loss.
Grief
The act or event of loss that results in the experience of grief.
Bereavement
An adjustment process that involves grief or sorrow over a period of time and helps in the reorganization of the life of an individual following the loss or death of someone loved.
Mourning
- Confirm the reality
- Express their emotions
- Modify emotional ties with the deceased
- Memorialize the person’s life
- Recognize and complete unfinished business
- Receive emotional support
- Be assured feelings are normal
- Be accepted for where they are
- Establish stability and security
- Provide a basis for building new interpersonal relationships
Common Needs of Bereaved People
Talking helps the survivors to understand what has happened, to make it real.
- Understanding as much as possible about the death can help confirm its reality.
- Unexpected deaths are harder for the family to understand and take longer to process (homicide, accident, suicide)
Confirm the Reality
Feelings such as happiness, anger and grief created by brain patterns and bodily changes.
Emotions
- Avoid cliches- they suppress the expression of the bereaved’s emotions.
- Expression of emotions can be vastly different for survivors
- Can be expressed by crying, screaming, saying the words, etc. What form they take does not matter, just the expression.
Express their Emotions
Survivors must break the ties of the old relationship and begin to develop a new life without the person.
- Must face the hard reality that their life with the deceased is changed forever.
Modify Emotional Ties with the Deceased
These symbolic events can be one method of marking the end of the old and the beginning of the new relationship.
- Funeral, memorial service
- Starting a charity or scholarship in the person’s name
- Building a wing in a hospital
- Headstones
Memorialize the Person’s Life
Most people feel that when the death happens, the opportunity to do this ends. A counselor can be helpful in assisting people to recognize, acknowledge, and finish unfinished business.
- Talking to deceased’s body at wake
- Writing the deceased a letter
- Visualizing the dead person and tellin him what you wanted to say while he was alive
Recognize and Complete Unfinished Business
Most bereaved people find the love and attention given them by family and friends comforting.
- Need nonjudgemental acceptance of people who really care about them
- If not from friends and family- counselor can step in
Receive Emotional Support
The feelings following death can be so foreign and strange that the survivor feels he must be going insane because he has never felt this way before.
- Trained counselor can help relieve the fear and anxiety and assist the survivor in realizing these feelings are normal responses to a normal death.
Be Assured Feelings are Normal
Survivors should not be told that they should be feeling a certain way at a certain time
Be Accepted for Where They Are
These feelings may be lost or out of control for survivors after a death. They will slowly return as time passes, even though their life will not be the same as before the death.
Establish Stability and Security
- Strengthen present relationships
- Can be from friendships, love or both.
- A new love relationship does not mean the deceased is forgotten, but that the survivor learned how to navigate the pathways of relationship building and nurture love for a new person.
Provide a Basis for Building new Interpersonal Relationships