Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 1

Reputational glitches are much more serious—and immensely difficult to recover from. 163

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 2

The wrong message and the wrong messenger can destroy careers whatever the substantive reality. 171

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 3

combination of confidence, poise, and authenticity that convinces the rest of us we’re in the presence of someone who’s the real deal. 182

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 4

people shown silent videos of pianists performing in international competitions picked out the winners more often than those who could also hear the sound track.2 226

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 5

the best predictor of success on the competition circuit was whether a pianist could communicate passion through body language and facial expression. 228

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 6

EP rests on three pillars: How you act (gravitas) How you speak (communication) How you look (appearance) 241

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 7

Gravitas is the core characteristic. Some 67 percent of the 268 senior executives we surveyed said that gravitas is what really matters. Signaling that “you know your stuff cold,” that you can go “six questions deep” in your domains of knowledge, is more salient than either communication (which got 28 percent of the senior executive vote) or appearance (which got a mere 5 percent). 248

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 8

eye contact matters enormously. 265

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 9

appearance (as we saw in the musical competition) is a critical first filter. 271

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 10

on the appearance front isn’t a function of what you were born with; rather, it’s a function of what you do with what you’ve got. 280

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 11

“You have to be there in bad times as well as good, to show you lead from the heart as well as from the head,” 382

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 12

CTI research reveals gravitas to consist of six key behaviors and traits. 397

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 13

we’re drawn to leaders who keep their promises, keep their cool, and show compassion as well as courage in making the truly hard choices? 410

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 14

GRACE UNDER FIRE 415

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 15

Most of us are like teabags, to borrow from Eleanor Roosevelt’s shrewd words: We don’t know how strong we are until we’re in hot water. 427

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 16

So while avoiding catastrophe may demonstrate competence, it is handling catastrophe that confers gravitas. 437

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 17

when you demonstrate that your confidence cannot be shaken, you inspire confidence in others. At worst, you’ll win their forgiveness and forbearance. Very possibly, you’ll win their trust and loyalty. 445

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 18

In a crisis, you can lean into the wind, acknowledge your shortcomings, and rise above them; or you can take cover. 457

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 19

SHOWING TEETH 471

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 20

Making difficult decisions is what we look to leaders to do. It is not so much about rendering the right decision, but about rendering a decision at a time when no one else dares, that confers gravitas, because it telegraphs that you have the courage, as well as the confidence, to impose a direction and take responsibility for it. 482

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 21

CTI research finds that 70 percent of leaders consider decisiveness to be a component of EP for both men and women, second only to confidence in a crisis, making it a core aspect of gravitas. 493

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 22

Being able to make decisions isn’t so much the issue as needing to appear decisive in public—the 495

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 23

the clinic’s Wall Street clientele describe them, more than justify the risks. Testosterone makes them feel bolder, louder, and more assertive, they say; as a result, they’re more comfortable showing teeth and taking risks. “It’s important to project an aura of invincibility,” one trader confided to me. 509

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 24

Real leaders don’t issue edicts just to look and sound like they’re in charge. Real leaders listen, gather critical information, weigh the options carefully, look for a timely opening (typically when everyone else is writhing in indecision), and then demand action. 526

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 25

SPEAKING TRUTH TO POWER 532

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 26

Make sure, however, that when you challenge authority, you’re coming from a core of unshakable values. 554

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 27

DEMONSTRATING EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE 571

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 28

EQ is just as important for building trust because demonstrating it shows you have not only self-awareness but also situational awareness. 606

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 29

RIGHT-SIZING YOUR REPUTATION 635

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 30

Your reputation does precede you, either bestowing gravitas or bleeding you of it. Before you enter a room or open your mouth, your reputation speaks for you—never more so than today, 636

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 31

56 percent of leaders concur that reputation matters a great deal in establishing EP for women and 57 percent agree it matters for men. 639

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 32

Managing your personal brand is almost a job unto itself, 640

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 33

You’ve got to be proactive in asserting who you are, what you stand for, and how you’d like to be perceived. 641

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 34

VISION AND CHARISMA 667

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 35

to communicate gravitas, it’s critical you telegraph vision. 687

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 36

I wish I’d given everything one hundred and fifty percent instead of the occasional one hundred percent.” 704

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 37

“You want brutal optimism. Great leaders are brutally optimistic.” 711

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 38

BLUNDERS 712

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 39

Sexual impropriety takes some kind of prize as a career killer—at least for men. 720

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 40

Surround yourself with people who are better than you. 747

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 41

Be generous with credit. 751

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 42

nothing undermines followership faster than a boss who hogs all the credit for him or herself. 752

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 43

Stick to what you know. Do not shoot from the hip; do not claim to know more than you do or possibly could know. 755

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 44

Show humility. Nothing signals you’re emotionally attuned more than your own willingness to admit mistakes and own up to failings and shortcomings. 760

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 45

Smile more. 769

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 46

“There are energy givers, and energy takers. Who do you want to spend time with? 772

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 47

Empower others’ presence to build your own. Others will see you as a leader when you concentrate on making those around you act responsibly and win visibility for themselves, 775

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 48

You’re a conductor of an orchestra. Executive presence is not what you do with your presence, it’s also what you do with other people’s presence.” 777

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 49

Snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. 780

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 50

Drive change rather than be changed. 788

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 51

communication is not so much what you say but rather how you say it. 845

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 52

The tone and timbre of your voice; your choice and use of words; your inflection, articulation, and delivery; and even your body language determine what and how much your listeners take in—and what overall impression of you they will form and retain as a result. 846

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 53

Your communication skills, both verbal and nonverbal, are what ultimately win you the attention and mindshare of colleagues, clients, and friends. 854

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 54

These six behaviors boil down to one thing, really: How powerfully do you connect with your audience? How quickly can you engage your listeners, and how long can you keep their attention? Effective communication is all about engagement. 860

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 55

A 2012 analysis of 120 financial spokespersons found that what makes a speaker persuasive are elements such as passion (27 percent), voice quality (23 percent), and presence (15 percent). Content matters a measly 15 percent.31 862

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 56

SUPERIOR SPEAKING SKILLS 871

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 57

cited inarticulateness, poor grammar, and an off-putting tone or accent as examples of verbal tics that undermine EP. 879

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 58

A British accent, on the other hand, does wonders for your gravitas, according to our focus groups, 895

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 59

Sounding uneducated likewise undermines your gravitas and marks you as an outsider to the inner circle, as I discovered. Indeed, 55 percent of our respondents identified it as a top communication blunder. 901

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 60

a voice in the lower-frequency range will encourage others to see you as successful, sociable, and smart, according to a 2012 study published in the Journal of Voice. 912

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 61

scientists at Duke University have discovered to be an optimally pleasing sound frequency of around 125 Hz.36 Human beings are apparently wired to tune into lower frequencies; and of course, we tend to pay attention longer to voices we don’t find irritating. 929

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 62

scientists found that a drop of 22 Hz in voice frequency correlated with a $187,000 bump in compensation 938

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 63

The lower your voice, the greater your leadership presence, which correlates to an increased likelihood of running a large company and making a substantial salary. 940

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 64

if you aspire to lead, you, too, must mesmerize your audience—or, to use the language of our survey research, “command a room,” 962

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 65

It’s all about making yourself human, she says: not oversharing, not indulging in self-revelation, but unveiling just enough of your inner core that your listeners feel connected to you and start pulling for you. 967

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 66

getting an audience to like you, to root for you, while at the same time giving the impression that you don’t need to be liked—this is the wire you want to walk. 970

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 67

amazed at how often eminent leaders rush their delivery. 985

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 68

slow down, but also to surround the text with pauses and silences to heighten their power— 986

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 69

“There is nothing so powerful as silence to make people sit up in their seats,” 990

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 70

Stories, not bullet points, are what grab and hold an audience. 998

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 71

It’s imperative you cut to the chase, be highly selective with your data, and whenever possible share an illustrative story. 1013

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 72

If you cannot command your subject, you certainly won’t be able to command the room. Know your material cold so that you needn’t rely on notes, and needn’t rely on your glasses to read notes. 1032

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 73

nothing is more important than eye contact, says Credit Suisse CEO Brady Dougan, because it telegraphs to your audience that you’re utterly in the moment. 1034

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 74

Get to the point, and then people will give you their attention.” 1046

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 75

Being forceful and assertive is a core executive trait, for both men and women (as 48 percent of our survey respondents agree). 1063

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 76

as assertiveness in a woman often makes her unlikable (the B-word is rolled out and she’s seen as overly aggressive). 1064

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 77

The best strategy for women may be what Linda Huber of Moody’s describes as “leading from behind.” In a room full of men, women often feel impelled to assert themselves by launching the first salvo. 1090

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 78

To command a room, you’ve first got to read it. Sensing the mood, absorbing the cultural cues, and adjusting your language, content, and presentation style accordingly are vital to your success as a communicator, and succeeding as a communicator is vital to your executive presence. 1120

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 79

“Reading your audience is all about winning their confidence so that when you speak, they really hear what you have to say.” 1148

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 80

“It’s the conversation before the meeting that establishes whether or not you’re worth listening to in the meeting,” one senior executive pointed out—a skill she refers to as “mastering the banter.” 1163

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 81

“In those initial seconds, you’re going to be judged on what they see, not what they hear, and your body language and poise are what they see first.” 1182

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 82

“I’ve been told I don’t demand respect, that my presence expects it,” 1196

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 83

When you stand tall, feet planted solidly and somewhat apart, chest out and shoulders back, you actually trigger a hormonal response that boosts testosterone and lowers cortisol, the steroid released from your adrenal glands in times of stress, from your bloodstream. 1205

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 84

Crying is just one of a menu of communication blunders that, in a mere instant, can suck the executive presence right out of you. 1233

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 85

The less there is between you and your audience, the better. 1249

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 86

Ditch the verbal crutches. Fillers such as “um,” “like,” and “you know” get in the way of and undermine your message. 1251

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 87

Broaden your small talk. 1254

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 88

Get control of your voice. 1261

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 89

she breathes, consciously and deeply, before taking the stage, to eradicate any shakiness in her voice. 1266

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 90

Overprepare. 1268

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 91

Less can be more. 1273

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 92

you can’t afford to be a wallflower at meetings. But she cautions against speaking up just for the sake of it. 1273

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 93

Invoke your vertical. 1277

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 94

sat there and, with every ounce of energy, just kept pushing my feet into the floor, sitting tall, and making my spine and head straight. Then I leaned forward and spoke. 1280

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 95

Lose the props. 1282

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 96

Do not allow challenges to your authority to go unanswered. 1285

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 97

appearance can “widen the gap” between herself and those she meets for the first time. 1318

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 98

Sixty-seven percent of the senior executives we surveyed told us that gravitas was the core characteristic of executive presence; 28 percent said that communication skills comprised the core; and a mere 5 percent said appearance was at the heart of the matter. 1331

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 99

appearance was typically the filter through which gravitas and communication skills were evaluated. 1333

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 100

high-performing junior employees oftentimes get knocked out of contention for key roles and promotions: they simply don’t look the part. 1334

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 101

BEING POLISHED AND GROOMED 1341

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 102

the intrinsic stuff (body type, height) is not what matters most; rather, it’s what you do with what you’ve got. 1344

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 103

What did Etcoff and her team find out? Not surprisingly, judgments about a woman’s attractiveness were heavily conditioned by how much makeup she was wearing—the more, the better—and number 4 was the top choice. 1355

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 104

Again, the rule of thumb seemed to be the more makeup the better. With one exception, the top choice for trustworthiness was number 3, not 4. This implies that although dramatic makeup gets high marks it’s hard to fully trust a woman who looks glamorous. 1358

Answer 104

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 105

West perceives his attire as his suit of armor, the thing that enables him to face the “bullets and arrows” endemic to his work. “It makes me feel good, to put on my uniform,” 1379

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 106

senior leaders told me that failure to come through on the grooming front signals either poor judgment or lack of discipline. 1395

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 107

Achieving polish comes down to this golden rule: Minimize distractions from your skill sets and performance. 1410

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 108

“It’s as though at a deep level, some women believe that the power they ultimately wield is their sexuality. But overt sexuality has no place in the executive suite.” 1421

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 109

You should look “appropriate for your environment, and authentic to you,” 1424

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 110

PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE, FIT, SLIM 1435

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 111

grooming and polish count way more than conventional good looks 1438

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 112

signal fitness and wellness. 1441

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 113

weight is held against women more than it’s held against men: 21 percent of the senior executives we surveyed believe that being overweight detracts from a woman’s executive presence, while only 17 percent believe it detracts from a man’s EP. 1457

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 114

SIMPLE, STYLISH CLOTHES THAT POSITION YOU FOR YOUR NEXT JOB 1468

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 115

We’re all on this journey. We’re either searching for our signature look, refining it, or reinventing it, because visibility is hard to maintain in our ever more competitive world economy. 1483

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 116

the older you get and the higher you go, the more latitude you’ll have—Steve Jobs, 1485

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 117

those whom we recognize today for their signature look have nonetheless spent years working on it and earning it. 1486

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 118

The journey begins by dressing for the job you want, not the job you have. 1487

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 119

your signature look encompasses not just you but also the physical space you occupy. 1500

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 120

CEOs are the public face of their companies, and they are well-advised to align their brands with that of the business they represent. 1507

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 121

If women’s leadership potential is unreasonably correlated to weight, men’s is unfairly correlated to height. Sixteen percent of our respondents said height contributed to men’s EP; only 6 percent said it contributed to women’s. 1517

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 122

appearance is the medium for your message and, as such, it should neither distract nor detract from what you stand for and what you want to say. 1562

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 123

Senior men find an overtly sexual female colleague tantalizing and terrifying at the same time. 1567

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 124

Fully 64 percent of senior male executives are hesitant to have one-on-one contact with high-performing junior women—out of fear, we infer, of fomenting perceptions that could lead to career derailment or even litigation. 1571

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 125

Looking unkempt in ways that aren’t cool is the blunder that tops the list for men and comes in second for women. Fully 76 percent of senior executives say that being disheveled detracts from the EP of a man (rumpled jackets, ill-fitting collars, baggy or unbelted pants, scuffed shoes). 1575

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 126

Image isn’t inborn. Leaders create it, often with help. They diligently work to refine and maintain it. They take pains to avoid blunders that might destroy it. 1617

Answer 126

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 127

IT’S NOT HOW GOOD YOU LOOK, IT’S HOW APPROPRIATE YOU LOOK FOR YOUR AUDIENCE 1636

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 128

“Your work attire is your armor. It should make you feel invincible, not add to your insecurities. 1646

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 129

To do and be your best, you must strive to look your best, and that look depends on forethought and attention to detail. It’s not an act so much as a mindset. Wear it when you walk in the office door and don’t take it off until you’re back home. 1667

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 130

Executive presence is all about inspiring trust and confidence in others. Once you’ve done that and are successfully “over the bar,” you can start to play with the dress code; ultimately you get to set the dress code. 1689

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 131

Get over the bar. Establish your bona fides. Win everyone’s faith and confidence. Then make your own rules. 1693

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 132

Giving critical EP feedback—one of the key roles an effective sponsor plays—is just so much easier man-to-man. 1739

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 133

Men will alert other men to wince-inducing EP gaffes such as bad breath or an unzipped fly, but confronted with a woman in too short a skirt or too tight a top, they’ll look away. Better to stay mum about a woman’s inappropriate attire than be sued for noticing it. 1739

Answer 133

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 134

people of color don’t get the feedback they need to develop their EP: Fearing discomfort as well as discrimination litigation, senior executives told us they would sooner pass over multicultural professionals lacking executive presence than have an honest conversation about their shortcomings. 1742

Answer 134

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 135

dispensing good critical feedback across all three EP pillars is a core leadership competency, 1772

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 136

“Leadership isn’t about being voted Ms. Popular,” says Sodexo’s Anand. “To be effective, it’s more important to be honest, and have those courageous conversations, than to be liked. At the end, that is what will garner the trust and respect so crucial to leadership.” 1779

Answer 136

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 137

If giving EP feedback marks you as a leader, then giving actionable EP feedback marks you as a great one. 1789

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 138

feedback: You’ll be clear on what the problem is. You’ll understand why it must be addressed. You’ll know precisely what you need to do to course-correct. 1806

Answer 138

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 139

great feedback is (1) timely, meaning it’s delivered either right before or right after you’ve blundered; (2) specific to one discrete behavior, as opposed to a global condemnation; and (3) prescriptive, or explicit about what actions need to be taken by you. 1812

Answer 139

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 140

Feedback is bad when it sets up a very narrow band of acceptability, 1817

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 141

Feedback is bad, too, when it’s vague: 1820

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 142

Improving feedback will require a two-pronged approach. First, you as a rising star must learn to become better at eliciting, receiving, and acting on criticism. And second, you as a leader must become better at giving criticism while still modeling how to receive it. 1824

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 143

Sponsors are not mentors. Sponsors are powerful leaders who see potential in you and, provided you give them 110 percent, will go out on a limb to make things happen for you. 1873

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 144

GIVE FREQUENT, DISCRETE POINTERS RATHER THAN SEMI-ANNUAL DOWNLOADS 1921

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 145

If by the time you sit down to impart feedback you’ve accumulated a laundry list of criticisms, then you’ve waited too long. 1922

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 146

DON’T IMPART FEEDBACK WHEN YOU’RE ANGRY 1924

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 147

“This may not be easy to hear,” Rohini Anand will begin by saying, “but please depersonalize it. I’m telling you this because I want you to be successful.” 1951

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 148

1970s, when social scientist Virginia Schein showed that both male and female managers perceive leadership attributes as more likely to be held by men than by women, studies have repeatedly confirmed that we associate masculine attributes with leadership suitability and feminine attributes with serve-ability—“taking charge” skills being the province of men, and “taking care” skills being the province of women.81 2002

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 149

research showing that gender is not a reliable predictor of how a person will lead, 2006

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 150

The likability-versus-competence trade-off is arguably the most tenacious, as well as pernicious, double bind that women in leadership confront. 2023

Answer 150

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 151

Across all three pillars of executive presence—gravitas, communication, and appearance—women continue to walk a tightrope. 2055

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 152

If you’re a white guy you’re untouchable in this environment, whereas if you’re a brown woman with equal or better credentials, you have to work twenty-five times harder to be considered a business professional.” 2101

Answer 152

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 153

The trickiest EP terrain a woman must navigate concerns her gravitas, where the forceful-but-unlikable chasm yawns the widest. 2152

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 154

men don’t see the double standard even as they apply it. 2184

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 155

31 percent of our respondents said that being “too bossy” undermines a woman’s EP, and 31 percent said being “too passive” undermines a woman’s EP. Go figure. 2187

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 156

WHEN YOU SHOW TEETH, SHOW THAT YOU HAVE THE BEST INTERESTS OF THE TEAM AT HEART 2208

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Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 157

the art of “arguing with grace.” 2210

Answer 157

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 158

Better to be a sniper, says Massad: Pick your target, pick your moment, and fire your best shot. 2236

Answer 158

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 159

Forty-one percent of professionals of color said they had felt the need to compromise their authenticity in order to conform to EP standards at their company. 2319

Answer 159

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 160

it might mean that the pathway to the top imposes increasingly heavy sacrifices for professionals of color. 2333

Answer 160

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 161

Nearly half of the gay professionals we surveyed for our 2011 report, The Power of “Out”: LGBT in the Workplace, said they remained closeted at work for fear of being ostracized by their colleagues and penalized professionally by their superiors.107 2367

Answer 161

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 162

White males have the ability to be further to the left and a little more animated when discussing volatile topics without being viewed negatively.” 2382

Answer 162

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 163

when you trumpet your difference, or make no effort to mute it, you are even more likely to become a target of unconscious bias or even overt discrimination. 2389

Answer 163

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 164

For minorities as well as gays, the corporate landscape bristles with land mines in the form of slights or snubs that serve as reminders of latent discrimination. 2390

Answer 164

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 165

Hispanics, we found, are nearly three times more likely than their white colleagues to be mistaken for someone’s secretary or assistant. 2398

Answer 165

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 166

Twenty-two percent of African-Americans say they’re frequently mistaken for someone else of their own race. 2399

Answer 166

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 167

I’ve found that sometimes when a group starts questioning your authenticity, then that’s the group trying to hold you back.” 2437

Answer 167

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 168

KNOW YOUR “NON-NEGOTIABLES” AND WALK AWAY 2442

Answer 168

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 169

NEVER TRY TO BE SOMEONE YOU’RE NOT 2450

Answer 169

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 170

PLAY THE LONG GAME 2463

Answer 170

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 171

PERCEIVE SLIGHTS AS OPPORTUNITIES TO ADDRESS IGNORANCE 2478

Answer 171

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 172

“It’s so easy to think that every slight might have something to do with your background or gender. It’s not to say there are no real snubs, but I’ve found that more often than not somebody’s coming from a place of ignorance rather than bigotry. 2489

Answer 172

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 173

SEEK AIR COVER BEFORE YOU STEP OUT TO ASSERT YOUR AUTHENTICITY 2493

Answer 173

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 174

LEVERAGE YOUR BACKGROUND 2511

Answer 174

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 175

DIFFERENTIATE YOURSELF BY WHAT MAKES YOU DIFFERENT 2529

Answer 175

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 176

Other CTI research shows that innate diversity on teams—having members who are female, nonwhite, or of non–European origin—boosts the team’s innovative potential by providing critical insight into the needs and wants of overlooked or underserved end users.110 2554

Answer 176

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 177

“diversity dividend”: When companies and leaders know how to harness and leverage gender, generation, ethnicity, race, culture, and nationality there is a significant impact on the bottom line. 2567

Answer 177

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 178

Sponsors are more powerful than mentors, because they’re more vested in the outcome. 2571

Answer 178

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett

Question 179

don’t downplay your difference. Commit to owning it. 2581

Answer 179

Executive Presence by Sylvia Ann Hewlett