Lecture 8: Interdependence Part 1 Flashcards
interdependence
- Exists when we need others and they need us to obtain valuable rewards
- Behaviours of each partner affect the outcomes of the other
interdependence theory
- Explains how partners in a relationship influence each other’s experiences and outcomes
- Derived from social exchange theory
social exchange theory
- Relationship partners are rational actors engaged in cost-benefit analyses
- Relationships begin when you give me some of what I want and I give you some of what you want
- We are driven to maximize rewards & minimize costs
social exchange
the process in which two people give and take desirable rewards from each other
outcomes formula
outcome = rewards - costs
interpreting outcomes
- If rewards > costs, net positive outcome
- If rewards < costs, net negative outcome
rewards
- Any of the ways a relationship may satisfy our needs & desires, something that is gratifying & pleasant
- Can be tangible or intangible
costs
- Any of the ways a relationship may prevent us from meeting our needs & desires, something that is punishing/frustrating
- Can be tangible or intangible
opportunity cost
the cost of not pursuing a possible reward
do all relationships have costs?
yes
how do we evaluate our outcomes?
- The same outcome may not necessarily lead to the same amount of satisfaction for different people
- When it comes to satisfaction, we evaluate the outcomes we receive relative to what we expect from our relationships
comparison level (CL)
personal standard; what we feel we deserve
satisfaction formula
Satisfaction = outcomes - CL
interpreting satisfaction
- If our satisfaction is positive, then we’re happy
- If our satisfaction is negative, then we’re unhappy
- We can be dissatisfied even if the relationship is highly rewarding and satisfied if the relationship is costly
sacrifice
giving up one’s own immediate preferences/ goals for the good of the partner or the relationship
impact of sacrifice on the relationship
- Perceiving that a partner has sacrificed can lead to increased appreciation with potentially positive consequences for the relationship
- But, it may depend on experiences around sacrifice
interdependence theory daily diary study
perceiving a partner’s sacrifice led to an increase in partner appreciation and relationship satisfaction only if the recipient’s expectations were low (positive expectancy violation)
interdependence theory daily diary study takeaway
even if a relationship is profitable and rewarding, you may not be satisfied if the profit isn’t big enough to meet your expectations
determining CL
everyone has their own CL
CL is influenced by
- Previous relationship experiences (how others have treated us in the past)
- Observing others’ relationships (personal experience or the media)
- Personality dispositions (attachment orientation, self-esteem)
what makes people stay together?
- Partners’ satisfaction with the relationship is a fairly small predictor of staying together over time
- There are also other factors involved in the decision
dependence
how free a person feels to leave the relationship (how strongly tied a person is to another)
determining dependence
A function of how our outcomes in a given relationship compared to possible alternative outcomes (how well you think you could do elsewhere)
dependence formula
Dependence = outcomes- CL alt
interpreting dependence
- If dependence is positive, then stable
- If dependence is negative, then unstable
comparison level for alternatives
- What we realistically expect we could get in another relationship or situation/ other alternatives currently available
- Includes other partners or being single
- The standard against which we decide whether to stay or leave
- The lowest level you will tolerate from your partners
- If you think we can do better in another relationship, we’re likely to leave our present partners and pursue bigger payoffs, even when we’re currently happy with what we’ve got
- If we’re currently unhappy in a relationship, we won’t leave it unless a better alternative presents itself
factors affecting CL alt
- Individual differences
- Cultural and structural factors
- Opportunity to encounter alternatives
- Motivated reasoning
barriers
all of the forces outside of the relationship that act to keep partners together
investments
resources tied to the relationship that would be lost if the relationship were to end
impact of barriers and investments on the relationship
- Both reduce the attractiveness of leaving a current relationship
(i.e. factored into our CL alts) - Our CL alts include both rewards & costs of leaving a relationship
4 relationship types
- happy and stable
- unhappy and unstable
- unhappy and stable
- happy and unstable
happy and stable relationship
- outcomes exceed both CL and CL alt
- It doesn’t matter if CL or CL alt is higher
unhappy and unstable relationship
outcomes are below both CL and CL alt
unhappy and stable relationship
outcomes are below CL but above CL alt
happy and unstable relationship
outcomes are below CL alt, but above CL
relative impact of rewards and costs
- Research suggests that the valuation of rewards & costs is more complicated
- Costs may be particularly influential because they carry more psychological weight
- We pay more attention to costs and remember costs more than rewards
- Roughly 5x greater influence
gottman’s research
- Brought couples into the lab and asked them to discuss a sore spot in their relationship
- They coded this interaction for various types of negative and positive behaviours
- They found that high-risk couples for divorce engaged in more negative behaviours than positive behaviours
- The opposite was found for low-risk couples
sacrifice detection
A reward has to be noticed to enter into our calculations
We may not notice all of the kind things our partners do for us
Daily diary study of sacrifices method
data collected from both members of the couple allows researchers to compare the partner data and see how often sacrifices are detected vs. missed
hit
the perceiver correctly detects that a sacrifice was made
miss
the perceived does not detect that a sacrifice was made when it was
false alarm
the perceiver perceives a sacrifice when there is not one
correct rejection
a sacrifice does not occur and is not perceived
Daily diary study of sacrifices findings
- Thinking that the partner has made a sacrifice (rightly or wrongly) boosts gratitude
- But individuals miss their partners’ sacrifices about 50% of the time
- Missed sacrifices leave sacrificing partners feeling underappreciated & dissatisfied
individual differences in approach vs. avoidance motivations
- Chronic strength of approach & avoidance motivations differs between individuals
- This has implications for processing social information
implications of avoidance motivation
- Biases attention toward negative stimuli
- Enhances memory for negative stimuli
- Increases negative construals of ambiguous/neutral events
implications of approach motivation
- Biases attention toward positive stimuli
- Enhances memory for positive stimuli
- Increases positive construals of ambiguous/neutral events
approach motivations and sacrifice
- Make your partner happy, grow intimacy in the relationship
- This led to more positive affect, greater relationship & life satisfaction, less conflict, and less chance of breaking up 1 month later
- Perceiving one’s partner as sacrificing for approach reasons was associated with more positive affect, life & relationship satisfaction
avoidance motivations and sacrifice
- Avoid disappointment or conflict
- This led to more negative affect, less relationship & life satisfaction, and more conflict
- Perceiving one’s partner as sacrificing for avoidance reasons associated with less positive affect, life & relationship satisfaction
approach motivation
gain positive outcomes
avoidance motivation
avoid negative outcomes
flourishing relationships
approach and avoidance goals are fulfilled
precarious relationships
approach goals are fulfilled but avoidance goals are not
distressed relationships
approach and avoidance goals are not fulfilled
boring relationships
approach goals are not fulfilled, but avoidance goals are
