Gaslighting Reading Flashcards
gaslighting
a sane and rational survivor is convinced of their own epistemic incompetence on false pretenses by a perpetrator
is gaslighting intentional?
It is unclear how intentional gaslighting is
what is the best solution to gaslighting?
to end the relationship
Four most common behaviour patterns that occurred in gaslighting relationships
- love-bombing
- isolating the survivor
- prepetrator unpredictability
- cold shouldering
love-bombing
inappropriate expressions of affection for the relationship stage
functions of love-bombing
Discounted perpetrator’s abusive behaviour, made survivors feel indebted to the perpetrator, made survivors confused about the nature of the relationship
isolating the survivor
often plays out through the expression of negative opinions about members of the survivor’s social circles
functions of isolating the survivor
helps perpetrators avoid accountability, results in survivors having fewer paths to fulfill social needs, contributes to survivor’s sense of “losing their grip on reality”
perpetrator unpredictability
a pattern of perpetrators unpredictably changing their behaviour from one emotional extreme to the other
function of perpetrator unpredictability
contributes to the target’s experience of uncertainty and confusion
Cold shouldering (stonewalling)
the absence of communication
function of cold-shouldering
communicates to survivors that they are out of sync with what is reasonable and controls their behaviour
common gaslighting behaviours
- Insults and accusations
- Blaming
- Turning the tables
turning the tables
changing the topic of conversation toward some perceived bad behaviour of the survivor
motivations for gaslighting
- Avoiding accountability (ex. For infidelity)
- Control
- Mixed motivations
Consequences of gaslighting for the survivor
- Diminished sense of self
- Increased guardedness
- Increased mistrust of others
what do gaslighting survivors emphasize?
the importance of separation from the perpetrator, time with others, prioritizing healthier relationships, and engaging in meaningful and re-embodying activities
demographics of gaslighting perpetrators
- Perpetrators of gaslighting tend to be older, Caucasian, and heterosexual males
- These demographics are associated with more social power
material goals and gaslighting
Perpetrators rarely attempt to achieve some kind of explicit or material goal
timespan of gaslighting
Gaslighting occurs over a relatively long timespan
Gaslighting experience in romantic relationships (GERR) model
- the relationship starts
- gaslighting cycle
- insight and recovery
the relationship starts
gaslighting is initiated with some form of love-bombing
gaslighting cycle
maintained via three, interacting, and powerful feedback loops
3 feedback loops
- Rationalization and motivation
- Rationalization and isolation
- Rationalization, isolation, and psychological consequences
insight and recovery
begins with the realization and acceptance that their partners are gaslighters, which allows survivors to reconceptualize their perpetrator’s actions and disrupt the gaslighting cycle
