Chapter 5: Communication Flashcards

1
Q

table talk

A

a research procedure that involves rating whether the message you are sending to your partner is positive or negative on a 5-point Likert scale and then having your partner rate their interpretation of it

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2
Q

benefit of table talk as a research procedure

A

it allows researchers to get a record of both your private thoughts and public actions

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3
Q

table talk findings

A

The impact of unhappy couples’ messages tends to be more negative

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4
Q

simple model of interpersonal comunication

A
  1. sender’s intentions (private and known only to the sender)
  2. sender’s actions (public and observable by anyone)
  3. effect on the lister (private and known only by the listener)
    * between each stage, noise, inference, and the sender’s style of encoding/ listeners style of decoding can influence the message
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5
Q

interpersonal gap

A
  • When the sender’s intentions differ from the effect on the receiver
  • More likely to occur in close relationships
  • Leads to relationship dissatisfaction
  • Can prevent rewarding relationships from beginning
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6
Q

functions of nonverbal communication

A
  1. providing information
  2. regulating interaction
  3. defining the nature of the relationship
  4. interpersonal influence
  5. impression management
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7
Q

providing information

A

a person’s behaviour allows others to make inferences about his or her intentions, feelings, traits, and meaning

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8
Q

regulating interaction

A

nonverbal behaviour provides cues that regulate the efficient give-and-take of smooth conversations and other interactions

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9
Q

defining the nature of the relationship

A

the type of partnership two people share may be evident in their nonverbal behaviour

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10
Q

interpersonal influence

A

goal-oriented behaviour designed to influence someone else

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11
Q

impression management

A

nonverbal behaviour that is managed by a person or a couple to create or enhance a particular image

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12
Q

facial expressions

A

Spontaneous facial expressions signal people’s moods

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13
Q

are emotions innate or learned?

A

Cross-cultural similarities in basic emotions suggest that they’re innate

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14
Q

correlates of happy expressions

A

Happy expressions are correlated with success in life

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15
Q

why do people sometimes deliberately manage their facial expressions

A

display rules

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16
Q

display rules

A

cultural norms that dictate what emotions are appropriate in particular situations

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17
Q

Four ways we can modify our expressions

A
  1. intensify
  2. minimize
  3. neutralize
  4. mask
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18
Q

intensify

A

exaggerating our expressions so that we appear to be experiencing stronger feelings than we really are

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19
Q

minimize

A

trying to seem less emotional than we really are

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20
Q

neutralize

A

trying to withhold our true feelings altogether

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21
Q

mask

A

replacing our feelings with an entirely different emotion

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22
Q

fake vs. real expressions

A

Fake expressions usually differ from authentic expressions

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23
Q

microexpressions

A

authentic flashes of real emotion that are visible during momentary lapses of control when one is trying to fake emotions

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24
Q

pupils and looking behaviour

A

Our pupils dilate when we’re looking at something that interests us

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25
Q

eye contact and relationships

A

When others make eye contact, they signal that we are the target of their attention

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26
Q

gazing and relationships

A
  • Gazing helps define the nature of a relationship
  • The more intimate the relationship, the more time people spend gazing into one another’s eyes
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27
Q

typical looking behaviour during conversations

A

People usually look at their conversation partners more when they’re listening than when they’re speaking

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28
Q

Visual dominance ratio (VDR)

A

compares the “look-speak” to “look-listen”

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29
Q

typical VDR

A

40/60

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30
Q

high-power VDR

A

60/40

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31
Q

function of body movement

A

Body movements support our verbal communication, making it easier for us to convey what we mean

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32
Q

are gestures innate?

A

no, gestures have different meanings in different languages

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33
Q

body movement as a status symbol

A

High-status people tend to adopt asymmetric postures and take up a lot of space, while low-status people adopt symmetric postures and take up less space

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34
Q

what body posture is considered most attractive?

A

Men and women find expansive body posture more attractive because it is more indicative of confidence

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35
Q

touch and relatonships

A
  • Different types of touches have different meanings
  • Positive feelings engender touches that are different from those that communicate disgust
  • People tend to touch each other more when their relationship is intimate
  • Loving touches are good for our health
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36
Q

interpersonal distance

A

the physical space that separates two people that is usually reserved for intimate interactions

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37
Q

4 types of interpersonal distance

A
  • Intimate zone (1.5 feet <)
  • Personal zone (1.5-4 feet)
  • Social zone (4-12 feet):
  • Public zone (12+ feet)
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38
Q

Intimate zone (1.5 feet <)

A

either be loving or hostile interactions

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39
Q

Personal zone (1.5-4 feet)

A

friendships and acquaintances

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40
Q

Social zone (4-12 feet)

A

interactions tend to be more business-like

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41
Q

Public zone (12+ feet)

A

interactions tend to be quite formal

42
Q

cross-cultural differences in interpersonal space

A
  • Asian countries routinely use larger distances
  • In warmer countries, people tend to prefer closer distances when they interact with strangers and larger distances with intimate partners than people in cooler climates
43
Q

gender differences in interpersonal distance

A

Women tend to like larger distances than men

44
Q

smell and relationships

A
  • Different emotions cause people to release different chemicals from their bodies
  • We are affected by chemosignals
  • Smelling happy chemosignals makes us more happy
45
Q

paralanguage

A
  • All the variations in a person’s voice other than the actual words they use
  • About how people say things
46
Q

gaining information from voices

A

Our voices provide better information about what we’re feeling than our facial expressions do

47
Q

gender and voice

A
  • Women speak in a higher pitch when talking to their lovers and men speak in a lower pitch
  • Women’s voices become more attractive during ovulation
  • Women prefer men with lower voices
48
Q

combing aspects of nonverbal communication

A
  • The components of nonverbal communication work together to convey consistent information about one’s intentions
  • Nonverbal behaviour allows us to fine-tune the intimacy of our interactions
49
Q

non conscious behavioural mimicry

A
  • All of the methods of nonverbal communication can be involved in nonconscious behavioural mimicry
  • People tend to like others more when their behaviour is being mimicked by their conversation partner (s), even if they don’t consciously realize it
50
Q

nonverbal sensitivity

A

The sensitivity and accuracy with which couples read, decode, and correctly interpret each other’s nonverbal behaviour predicts how happy their relationship will be

51
Q

gender differences in nonverbal sensitivity

A
  • Women are better encoders and decoders of information than men in general
  • Men seem to be worse at nonverbal communication due to both skill and motivation
52
Q

nonverbal sensitivity studies

A
  • In one study, men in troubled marriages did a poor job encoding and decoding their wives’ communication, but the same trend was not found for women
  • In another study, both the husbands and wives in an unhappy marriage understood strangers better than they understood each other
53
Q

nonverbal insensitivity as a vicious cycle

A

Nonverbal insensitivity and dissatisfaction can become a vicious cycle, with each exacerbating the other

54
Q

problems with nonverbal sensitivity stem from either

A
  1. skill deficits
  2. performance deficits
55
Q

can we improve at nonverbal communication?

A

Everyone can improve at nonverbal communication if they try

56
Q

self-disclosure

A
  • The process of revealing personal information to someone else
  • One of the defining characteristics of intimacy
57
Q

ways people can become closer to each other

A
  • breadth
  • depth
58
Q

social penetration theory

A

holds that relationships develop through systematic changes in communication

59
Q

breadth

A

the variety of topics they discuss

60
Q

depth

A

the personal significance of the topics they discuss

61
Q

opener scale

A

assess the ability of people to elicit self-disclosure from others
Early encounters typically involve reciprocity in self-disclosure

62
Q

interpersonal process model

A

argues that general intimacy is likely to develop between two people only when certain conditions have been met

63
Q

3 conditions of interpersonal process model

A
  1. People have to engage in meaningful self-disclosure
  2. They have to respond to each other’s disclosures with interest and empathy
  3. Perceived partner responsiveness
64
Q

perceived partner responsiveness

A

They have to recognize that the other is being responsive

65
Q

secrets in relationships

A

People generally keep secrets in relationships to protect themselves, their relationships, or others

66
Q

taboo topics in relationships

A
  • Sometimes, partners will agree to steer clear of taboo topics
  • The most taboo topic is the state of the relationship
67
Q

triangle test

A

watch closely to see how their lover responds to other attractive people

68
Q

endurance test

A

contrive difficulties that the lover must overcome to demonstrate their devotion

69
Q

separation test

A

find reasons to be apart and see how enthusiastically their lovers welcome their return

70
Q

taboo topics and relationship satisfaction

A

The more taboo topics there are in a relationship, the less satisfied the partners are unless they’re avoiding the topics to promote and protect their relationship

71
Q

self-disclosure and relationship satisfaction

A
  • The more self-disclosure couples share, the happier they tend to be
  • We like people more because we have self-disclosed to them, and we self-disclose to people we like
  • It’s rewarding to be entrusted with self-disclosures from other
  • Those who self-disclose more have better health and greater life satisfaction
72
Q

secure attachment and communication

A
  • People with secure attachment styles exhibit warmer and more expressive nonverbal behaviour
  • Secure people are more affectionate and keep fewer secrets than insecure people
73
Q

avoidance of intimacy and communication

A

Those who are high on avoidance of intimacy tend to engage in less self-disclosure, decode others’ expressions of positive emotions less accurately, and judge others’ negative emotions to be more intense and hostile than they really are

74
Q

anxiety about abandonment and communication

A

Those who are high in anxiety about abandonment are more talkative and self-disclose too much too soon

75
Q

gender differences in verbal communication

A
  • Women are more likely to discuss their feelings about their close relationships and other personal aspects of their lives
  • Men tend to stick to more impersonal matters, so their conversations tend to be less intimate
  • When men and women interact with each other, these differences are less apparent
  • Women are more indirect and speak less forcefully than men
  • Women speak more often than men but produce fewer monologues
  • Women are more self-disclosing than men and score higher on the “Opener” scale
  • Heterosexual men share their most meaningful intimacy only with women
76
Q

what explains gender differences in verbal communication

A

Communication differences are more associated with gender roles than biological sex

77
Q

kitchen-sinking

A

addressing several topics at once, which causes one’s primary concern to get lost in the barrage of frustrations

78
Q

off-beam

A

conversations that wander from topic to topic

79
Q

mindreading

A

occurs when people assume that they understand their partners’ thoughts, feelings, and opinions without asking

80
Q

yes-butting

A

finding something wrong or un-workable with anything their partners say

81
Q

cross-complaining

A

ignoring what your partner said and meeting his or her complaint with a complaint

82
Q

belligerence

A

aggressive rejection

83
Q

The four horsemen of the apocalypse

A

4 criteria that emphasize that the end of a relationship is near

84
Q

four horsemen of the apocalypse

A

criticism, contempt, defensiveness, stonewalling

85
Q

critcism

A

attacks a partner’s personality or character instead of identifying a specific behaviour that is causing concern

86
Q

contempt

A

insults, mockery, or hostile humour

87
Q

defensiveness

A

seeking to protect oneself from an unreasonable attack by making excuses or hurling counterattacks

88
Q

stonewalling

A

withdrawal into a stony silence

89
Q

miscommunication patterns of unhappy couples

A
  • They do a poor job of saying what they mean
  • They do a poor job of hearing each other
  • They display negative affect when they talk to each other
90
Q

behaviour description

A

tells our partners what’s on our minds and focuses the conversation on discrete, manageable behaviours that can readily be changed

91
Q

I-statements

A

statements that start with “I” and then describe a distinct emotional reaction

92
Q

xyz-statements

A

statements that follow the form of “When you do X in situation Y, I feel Z.”

93
Q

two tasks when we’re listening

A
  • Accurately understand what our partner is trying to say
  • Communicate attention and comprehension
94
Q

how can we accomplish the two tasks of listening?

A

paraphrasing

95
Q

paraphrasing

A

repeating a message in our own words and giving the sender a chance to agree that that’s actually what they meant

96
Q

perception checking

A

people assess the accuracy of their inferences about a partner’s feelings by asking the partner for clarification

97
Q

negative affect reciprocity

A

when people are contemptuous of each other with each being scornful of what the other has to say

98
Q

how to stay cool?

A
  • Anger results from the perception that others are causing us illegitimate, unfair, or unavoidable grief
  • We can reframe this perception to reduce or prevent anger
99
Q

validation

A

acknowledging the legitimacy of others’ opinions and communicating respect for their positions

100
Q

using validation to minimize conflict

A

We don’t have to agree with others, but showing respect and validation for their opinions will minimize conflict