Millionaire's Dinner Party Chapter 5 Translation

Question 1

Eius modi fabulae vibrabant, cum Trimalchio intravit et, detersa fronte, unguento manus lavit spatioque minimo interposito ‘ignoscite mihi’ inquit ‘amici, multis iam diebus venter mihi non respondet. nec medici me iuvare possunt. profuit tamen mihi malicorium et iam, spero, aliquid recreatus sum; alioquin circa stomachum mihi sonat, putes taurum. itaque si quis vestrum voluerit exire, non est cur eum pudeat, nemo nostrum solide natus est. ego nullum puto tantum tormentum esse quam se continere. multos scio sic periisse, dum nolunt sibi verum dicere.’

Answer 1

Stories of its kind were buzzing around , when Trimalchio entered and having wiped his forehead, he washed his hands with scent and with the shortest interval he said “forgive me my friends, for many days my bowels have not performed. The doctors were not able to help me. However pomegranate rind has benefitted me and now I hope I am somewhat restored/better; otherwise there is such a rumbling in my stomach you would think it was a bull. So if any of you want to leave/go out there is no reason to be ashamed. None of us is born solid. I think that there is no greater torture than to hold oneself in. I know many who have perished in this way, while they did not want to tell themselves the truth”

Question 2

gratias agimus liberalitati indulgentiaeque eius, multum bibentes ut celemus risum. nec adhuc sciebamus nos non iam ad mediam cenam advenisse.

Answer 2

We thank him for his frankness/kindness and indulgence, drinking much in order to hide a laugh. Nor still did we know we had not yet arrived at the middle of dinner.

Question 3

nam, mensis ad symphoniam mundatis, tres albi sues in triclinium adducti sunt capistris et tintinnabulis culti, quorum
unum bimum esse dicebat servus, alterum trimum, tertium sexennem.

Answer 3

For when the table been cleaned for the band, three white pigs were led to the dining room dressed with muzzles and bells, one of which the slave said was two, the other three and the third six years old.

Question 4

ego putabam porcos, sicut in circulis mos est, portenta aliqua facturos esse. sed Trimalchio, ne diutius miraremur, ‘quem’ inquit ‘ex eis vultis in cenam statim caedi?’

Answer 4

I thought that the pigs , as it is custom in the crowds in the streets, would do some tricks. But Trimalchio, lest we wonder any longer said “Which out of these do you want to be killed at once immediately for dinner?”

Question 5

tum cocum vocari iussit
et non exspectata electione nostra maximum iussit occidi. tum clara
voce: ‘ex quota decuria es?’ ille respondit se ex quadragesima esse. cui Trimalchio ‘utrum emptus es an domi natus?’ ‘neutrum’ inquit cocus ‘sed testamento Pansae tibi relictus sum.’

Answer 5

Then he ordered the chef to be called and not waiting for our choice he ordered the biggest one to be killed. Then in a clear voice “Which division are you from?” He responded that the was from the 40th. To which Trimalchio said “Were you bought or born at home?” ‘Neither’ the cook said ‘but I was left to you in the will of Pansa.”

Question 6

‘vide ergo’ ait Trimalchio ‘ut diligenter ponas; si non, te iubebo in decuriam viatorum conici.’

Answer 6

“Therefore see to it” said Trimalchio “that you serve diligently; if not I will order you to be thrown into the division of messengers.”

Question 7

et cocum quidem potentiae domini admonitum ad culinam obsonium duxit.

Answer 7

And indeed the dish led the cook, having been reminded of the master’s power, to the kitchen.

Question 8

Trimalchio autem miti ad nos vultu respexit et ‘vinum’ inquit
‘si non placet, mutabo. deorum beneficio non emo, sed quidquid
ad salivam facit in praedio nascitur eo, quod ego adhuc non novi.

Answer 8

Trimalchio however, turned to us with a mild expression and said “I will change the wine if it does not please you. I do not buy wine by the kindness of the gods, but whatever makes your mouth water is produced in that estate which I still do not know yet.

Question 9

dicitur esse prope Tarentum. nunc coniungere agellis meis Siciliam
volo, ut, cum ad Africam voluero ire, per meos fines navigem.

Answer 9

It is said to be near Tarentum. I now wish to join Sicily to my little farms, so that when I want to go to Africa I may sail through my own lands.

Question 10

sed narra tu mihi, Agamemnon, quam controversiam hodie egisti? ego etiam
si causas non ago, in domesticum usum litteras didici. et ne me putes
studia contemnere, duas bibliothecas habeo, unam Graecam, alteram
Latinam.

Answer 10

But tell me, Agamemnon, what debate have you engaged in today? Even if I do not plead in court, I have learned the letters (alphabet) for domestic use. And lest you think that I despise/scorn/think little of my studies I have 2 libraries, one Greek, the other Latin.

Question 11

dic ergo, si me amas, peristasim declamationis tuae.’ cum
dixisset Agamemnon: ‘pauper et dives inimici erant’, ait Trimalchio
‘quid est pauper?’

Answer 11

Say then, if you like me, the outline of your speech. When Agamemnon had said “the poor man and the rich man were enemies” Trimalchio said “what is a poor man?”

Question 12

‘urbane’ inquit Agamemnon et nescioquam controversiam exposuit. statim Trimalchio ‘hoc’ inquit ‘si factum est, controversia non est; si factum non est, nihil est.’

Answer 12

“Wittily said” Agamemnon said, and he explained (a version of) some debate or another. Immediately Trimalchio said “if this is done, there is no debate; if it is not done, it is nothing.”

Question 13

talia efflabat cum repositorium cum sue ingenti mensam occupavit. mirari coepimus celeritatem et iurare ne gallum quidem tam cito coqui posse.

Answer 13

He was puffing out such rubbish when a dish with a huge pig occupied the table. We began to marvel at the speed and to swear that even a chicken could not be cooked so quickly.

Question 14

deinde Trimalchio porcum intuens ‘quid? quid?” inquit ‘porcus hic non est exinteratus? non mehercule est. voca, voca cocum.’ cum constitisset ad mensam cocus tristis et diceret se
oblitum esse exinterare, ‘quid? oblitus?’ Trimalchio exclamat.

Answer 14

Then Trimalchio, looking at the pig said “what? what? Is this pig not gutted? By heralds? it is not. Call, call the cook. When the sad cook had halted/stood still at the table and said that he had forgotten to gut, Trimalchio exclaimed “what? forgot?

Question 15

‘putes illum piper et cuminum non coniecisse. despolia eum.’

Answer 15

You would think him not to have thown in pepper and cumin. Strip him”

Question 16

non fit mora. despoliatus cocus inter duos tortores maestus constitit. deprecari omnes coeperunt et dicere: ‘solet fieri; rogamus ut remittas eum. postea si fecerit, nemo nostrum pro illo rogabit.’

Answer 16

There is no delay. The stripped cook stood sad between two torturers. Everybody began to plead and say “it is usually done, we ask that you let him off.” Afterwards, if he has done it, none of us will ask for him.”

Question 17

ego, vir crudelissimae severitatis, non potui me tenere, sed inclinatus ad aurem Agamemnonis ‘plane’ inquam ‘hic debet esse servus nequissimus. num quis potest oblivisci porcum exinterare?’

Answer 17

I, a man of the most cruel severity could not hold myself, but leaning to Agamemnon’s ear I said “clearly this must be the most wicked slave. Can anyone forget to gut a pig? Surely no one can?”

Question 18

at Trimalchio relaxato in risum vultu ‘ergo’ inquit ‘quia tam malae
memoriae es, palam nobis illum exintera.’

Answer 18

But Trimalchio, relaxing with a smile on his face said “since you have such a bad memory gut it out for us openly.”

Question 19

recepta cocus tunica cultrum arripuit porcique ventrem hinc et illinc timida
manu secuit. nec mora, ex plagis crescentibus tomacula cum botulis
effusa sunt.

Answer 19

The cook who had recovered his tunic took a knife and cut the pigs belly here and there with a timid hand. Without delay, sausages and black puddings poured out from the growing slits.