The Funeral- Section 1- The Value of the Funeral Flashcards
- Barbaric and plastic
- Funeral directors prey on families when most vulnerable
- Waste of money/rip off
- Sophisticated people are above grieving
- More civilized to take care of things in a private manner
Perceptions of Funerals
This is easier than reality.
Denial
A minimal and private affair usually means:
A longer Grief Process
The best thing to do with grief is to grieve, but finding the ___ and the ____ where that can happen is most diffucult.
Place and People
People in grief need ____. They need safe places and safe people. People who will not try to “fix” it or tell them how they should, or should not feel.
Safety
We become ___ when we get comfortable enough to allow people to grieve without feeling like we should immediately step in to try to stop the tears or express some platitude that will make them calm down.
Safe
People in grief are sensitive to our ____.
Fears
- Hang around
- Hug them
- Hush
Three H’s for Helping People in Grief
- Trust presence
- Trust touch
- Trust silence
What Makes us Safe
When ______ is not there, there seems to be a lack of connection for the family.
Participation
Allowing the family to participate in the whole process in whatever degree they desire and are comfortable doing.
Personalization
- A way of showing love
- Helps us face reality
- Draws the family into the process
Participation
People need to establish the significance of their loved one.
Participation is a way of Showing Love
As we involve ourselves in the process, the death becomes real. This reality turns our grieving loose and realeases our feelings. This is the first step towards healing.
Participation Helps us Face Reality
Families will usually build barriers between each other and will try to act stronger than they are. Participation wil break these barriers and the family will begin grieving in front of each other.
Participation Draws the Family Into the Process
