3Idiots - 2 Flashcards

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1
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Time up.

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2
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Time up, sir.

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3
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No one got the answer?

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4
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Now rewind your life by a minute.

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5
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When I asked this question, were you excited? Curious?

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6
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Thrilled that you’d learn something new?

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7
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Anyone? … Sir?

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8
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No. You all got into a frantic race.

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9
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What’s the use of such methods, even if you come first

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10
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Will your knowledge increase? No, just the pressure.

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11
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This is a college, not a pressure cooker.

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12
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Even a circus lion learns to sit on a chair in fear of the whip.

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13
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But you call such a lion ‘well trained’, not ‘well educated’

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14
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Hello!

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15
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This is not a philosophy class. Just explain those two words

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16
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Sir, these words don’t exist.

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17
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These are my friends’ names. Farhan and Raju

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18
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Quiet!

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19
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Nonsense! Is this how you’ll teach Engineering?

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20
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Sir, I wasn’t teaching you Engineering.

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21
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You’re an expert at that.

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22
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I was teaching you… how to teach.

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23
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And I’m sure one day you’ll learn.

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24
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because unlike you, I never abandon my weak students.

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25
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Bye, sir.

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26
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Quiet!

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27
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Quiet, I said.

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28
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I regret to inform you that your son…

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29
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Farhan… Raju…

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30
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has fallen into bad company.

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31
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Without urgent corrective steps, his future will be ruined.

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32
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Virus’s letters dropped on our homes like atom bombs.

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33
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Hiroshima and Nagasaki plunged into gloom.

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34
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Our parents invited us - for a dressing down.

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35
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Come in.

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36
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See that?

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37
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We could afford just one air-conditioner.

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38
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We put it in Farhan’s room, so he could study in comfort.

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39
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I didn’t buy a car. I manage with a scooter.

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40
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We put all our money into Farhan’s education.

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41
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We sacrificed our comforts for Farhan’s future. Understand?

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42
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You took these pictures, Farhan?

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43
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He had that useless obsession for a while.

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44
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Went around taking pictures of animals.

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45
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Wanted to be a wildlife photographer.

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46
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Son, what was your score that year?

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47
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91%

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48
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Hear that? Straight drop from 94% to 91%.

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49
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You find it funny?

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50
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No sir, sorry. I’m just amazed at the photos

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51
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Why make him an engineer… Why not a wildlife photographer?

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52
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Enough!

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53
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I humbly request you - Don’t ruin my son’s future.

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54
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Food’s on the table, boys. C’mon.

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55
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If you ever visit again, do eat with us.

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56
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Dad denied us a meal…

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57
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So, to fill our bellies with food…

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58
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and ears with more reprimands, we reached Raju’s house.

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59
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Raju’s house was straight out of a 50’s black and white film.

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60
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A small, dingy room…

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61
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a paralyzed father…

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62
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a coughing mother…

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63
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and an unwed sister

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64
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A sofa sprouting springs…

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65
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a 24 hour water supply - from the leaking roof.

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66
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Mother was a retired school teacher and a tireless complainer.

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67
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Father was once a postmaster.

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68
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Paralysis shut down his body partly…

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69
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his salary completely. And the sister…

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70
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Kammo’s turned 28. They demand a car in dowry.

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71
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If you don’t study and earn, how will she marry?

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72
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Some okra?

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73
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Okra is now 12/- per kilo, cauliflower is 10/-

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74
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It’s daylight robbery!

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75
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What will we eat if we get warnings from your college?

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76
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Mom!

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77
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Cottage cheese?

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78
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Cottage cheese should be sold at the jewelers, in velvet pouches

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79
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  • Cottage cheese? - No, no, it’s ok.
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80
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Mom, please.

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81
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Alright, I’ll shut up

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82
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Earn for the family, slave like a maid.

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83
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and then take the vow of silence.

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84
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If not with my son, with whom do I share my woes - his friends?

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85
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Hey Raju.

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86
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We were in a huge dilemma.

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87
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Do we comfort our friend or console his mom?

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88
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Screw it, we thought, let’s focus on the cottage cheese.

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89
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Even his eczema cream costs 55/- now

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90
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Another roti?

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91
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No, thank you. We’re through.

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92
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Okra for 12/- - Cauliflower for 10/-

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93
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At least you were offered a meal

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94
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Unlike your sadistic dad… ‘Hitler’ Qureshi!

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95
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And your mom is Mother Teresa… Feeding us ‘eczema roti’!

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96
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  • Don’t poke fun at my mom! - Enough, you guys.
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97
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I’m famished. Let’s eat out.

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98
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It’s month end. Who’ll pay? His Mother Teresa?

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99
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To eat out, you don’t need money. Just a uniform. Look…

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100
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  • C’mon. - Come.
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101
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Good evening, good evening.

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102
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Oh, Uncle.

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103
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NAME?

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104
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If we’re caught, we’re dead.

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105
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  • What’s for starters? - Get double portions.
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106
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Leave this here and start some peppy music.

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107
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Pia, what the hell?

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108
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Why’re you wearing this ancient piece of junk?

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109
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What’ll people say - My fiancee…

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110
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a doctor in the making, wearing a cheap, 200/- watch!

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111
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Please take it off. Thank you.

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112
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Hi handsome.

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113
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Hey Aunty. You’re looking good.

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114
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  • Don’t miss my set, darling. - Rubies?
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115
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  • From Mandalay - Mandalay… Wow!
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116
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  • Hey, let’s go meet David. - Of course.
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117
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Excuse me.

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118
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Yes?

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119
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Flowers.

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120
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NAME?

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121
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So you don’t break it on my head

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122
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Why would I do that?

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123
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For the free advice I’ll now impart

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124
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What?

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125
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Don’t marry that ass

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126
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Excuse me?

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127
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He’s not a human, he’s a price tag.

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128
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He’ll turn your life into a nightmare of brands and prices.

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129
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He’ll ruin your life. Your future will be finished.

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130
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Want a demonstration?

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131
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Shall I find out the price of his shoes?

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132
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I won’t ask. He’ll announce it himself.

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133
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What the hell… Mint sauce on my $300 shoes!

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134
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Run for your life! It’s free advice. Take it or leave it.

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135
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Genuine Italian leather - hand-stitched!

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136
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Dad, are they your guests?

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137
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My students. What’re they doing here?

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138
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Hold on, Dad.

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139
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These beans smell great.

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140
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NAME?

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141
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NAME?

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142
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That was an eye-opener. Thank you so much.

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143
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It was my moral responsibility.

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144
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Can I ask you for little more help?

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145
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Dad won’t let me break off this engagement.

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146
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You explain so well. Can you give him a demo too?

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147
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Certainly. Raju, the mint sauce

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148
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You’re really sweet

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149
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NAME?

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150
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Aal izz well

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151
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Run for your life! It’s free advice. Take it or leave it

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152
Q

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What’re you doing here?

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153
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We’ll hand these gifts to the couple.

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154
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I’ll do that for you. It’s my sister’s wedding.

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155
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Sister?

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156
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Sir, what’s the sum total of your daughters?

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157
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Empty. No gift cheques.

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158
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Forgot the cheques, Raju … Farhan?

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159
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We didn’t invite you, you must be from the groom’s side.

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160
Q

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No sir, we’re here as the emissaries of science.

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161
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How? Can you explain?

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162
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Dad, he explains superbly. I’m sure he’ll give us a demo.

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163
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Won’t you?

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164
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Well, Delhi has plenty of power cuts that…

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165
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disrupt wedding celebrations.

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166
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So I thought of making an inverter that…

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167
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A

draws power from guests’ cars.

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168
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I see.

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169
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Wow!

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170
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So where’s the inverter?

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171
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Sir, the design is ready.

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172
Q

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Where’s the design, Farhan?

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173
Q

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A

NAME?

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174
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Raju, design?

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175
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Never mind the design. I’ll make the inverter and show you.

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176
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You can only invent stories, not an inverter.

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177
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I’ll make one, I promise.

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178
Q

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And I’ll name it after you. After all, it was invented…

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179
Q

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at your daughter’s wedding. So it’ll be an honor…

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180
Q

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Farhan, Raju. I’ll see you in my office tomorrow.

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181
Q

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Sir, what was the cost per plate? We’ll reimburse you…

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182
Q

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… in installments.

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183
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  • We’ll never crash a wedding again. - Not even my own.
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184
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In fact, I won’t even marry. Nor will he.

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185
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Uh… right. No marriage.

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186
Q

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Your parents shouldn’t have married either.

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187
Q

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A

The world would have to feed two less idiots.

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188
Q

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A

Sit!

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189
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A

Pay attention.

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190
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This is Ranchoddas’s father’s monthly income.

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191
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Couple of zeroes less, and it’s still a sizeable income.

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192
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But erase another zero, and I would worry a little.

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193
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Isn’t that your fathers income, Farhan?

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194
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Yes, sir.

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195
Q

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A

Now take away another zero…

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196
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and that’s your family income, Raju Rastogi.

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197
Q

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A

Big reason to worry.

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198
Q

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A

Take my advice and shift into Chatur Ramalingam’s room.

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199
Q

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A

Exams are here. Stay with Rancho and you’re sure to fail.

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200
Q

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A

NAME?

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201
Q

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A

Then get lost!

202
Q

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A

Raju, don’t worry. This is Virus’s move to split us. Divide and rule.

203
Q

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A

I have to worry.

204
Q

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A

He grades us, and I need good grades for a good job.

205
Q

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A

Unlike you, I don’t have a rich dad I can live off.

206
Q

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A

Shut up, Raju.

207
Q

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A

Must we follow all his hogwash? ‘Aal izz well’.

208
Q

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A

I won’t be his flunky… like you.

209
Q

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A
  • You’re crossing the line. - No, I’m drawing one.
210
Q

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A

I have a family to support.

211
Q

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A

Dad’s medicines swallow up mom’s pension.

212
Q

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A

My sis can’t marry because they want a car in dowry.

213
Q

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A

Mom hasn’t bought a single saree in five years.

214
Q

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A

Now don’t get your mom’s wardrobe into the debate.

215
Q

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A

By the way, how many sarees per annum is reasonable?

216
Q

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A

Hey… no wisecracks about mom.

217
Q

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A

We’ll study with all our heart, but not just for grades.

218
Q

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A

To quote a Wise One - Study to be accomplished, not affluent.

219
Q

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A

Follow excellence. And success will chase you, pants down!

220
Q

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A

Which Wise One says this? His Holiness Guru Ranchoddas?

221
Q

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A

Go rot in the bogs!

222
Q

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A

Raju, don’t stress. We’ll top our class. Nothing is impossible.

223
Q

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A

Oh yeah?

224
Q

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A

Shove this back into the tube.

225
Q

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A

Raju got onto another train.

226
Q

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A

His travails with Chatur began. Yes, I mean travails, not travels

227
Q

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A

Chatur was called ‘Silencer’.

228
Q

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A

To sharpen his memory, he popped pills from a local quack.

229
Q

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A

And then let off silent… but lethal farts.

230
Q

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A

I didn’t do it… Raju?

231
Q

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A

He always blamed others for the output.

232
Q

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A

Silencer crammed 18 hours a day.

233
Q

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A

On exam eve, he would distract others.

234
Q

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A

His belief - There are only two ways of topping.

235
Q

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A

Elevate your own grades or shrink your opponents’ grades.

236
Q

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A

Rancho decided to subdue Silencer and rescue Raju…

237
Q

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A

with one master plan.

238
Q

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A

Our Director has unceasingly served… ‘Served’ means…

239
Q

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A

Damn the meaning, I’ll memorize it.

240
Q

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A

Chatur was the introductory speaker at the Teachers’ Day function.

241
Q

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A

To impress Virus, he got his speech written by the librarian…

242
Q

add

A

in highbrow Hindi.

243
Q

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A

Hello. Hold on. Chatur, call for you.

244
Q

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A

Please collect the printout. I’ll be right back.

245
Q

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A

Oh… the things I have to do…

246
Q

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A

Mr. Dubey, the Director was remembering you.

247
Q

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A

NAME?

248
Q

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A

I’ll see him right away. Give this to Chatur.

249
Q

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A

NAME?

250
Q

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A

Yes?

251
Q

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A

I’m calling from the police station

252
Q

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A

NAME?

253
Q

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A
  • Your life is in danger! - What? … How?
254
Q

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A

Listen carefully, or else…

255
Q

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A

you’ll get killed as you step out of the college gate.

256
Q

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A

Why? What happened?

257
Q

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A

While Chatur was kept engaged,

258
Q

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A

Rancho altered a few words in his speech, for eg…

259
Q

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A

‘served’ became ‘screwed’.

260
Q

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A

Yes sir?

261
Q

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A

NAME?

262
Q

add

A

I’m permanent staff, sir.

263
Q

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A

Congratulations!

264
Q

add

A

Hold on a moment. The chief is on the other line.

265
Q

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A

Excuse me, sir…

266
Q

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A

Yes… so where was I?

267
Q

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A

You said I may die… outside the gate.

268
Q

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A

Right. As you get out of the gate, you’ll see a traffic signal.

269
Q

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A

Traffic signal. Ok.

270
Q

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A

When it turns red, all the cars will halt.

271
Q

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A

Ok. Then?

272
Q

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A

Then cross the road with great caution.

273
Q

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A

Because son, in rush hour if a car hits you, you’re dead.

274
Q

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A

What nonsense! I know that.

275
Q

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A

You know that? Excellent. Then you’re safe my boy.

276
Q

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A

From the librarian, Silencer.

277
Q

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A

You don’t call me that, Chanchad.

278
Q

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A

Hey. The Director said he didn’t call for me.

279
Q

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A

Who said ‘called’? I just said he ‘remembered’ you

280
Q

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A

Remembered? Rascals!

281
Q

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A

Distinguished Mr. Chairperson.

282
Q

add

A

Chief guest, the Honorable Minister of Education….

283
Q

add

A

respected teachers and friends.

284
Q

add

A

ICE has now soared beyond the stratosphere.

285
Q

add

A

The credit goes solely to…

286
Q

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A

Dr. Viru Sahastrabuddhe. Give him a big hand.

287
Q

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A

Sir, the voice is his but the words are mine.

288
Q

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A

He’s a great guy, really you are.

289
Q

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A

For 32 years, he has unceasingly screwed students.

290
Q

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A

He means - ‘served’ students.

291
Q

add

A

I’m sure his endeavors will continue.

292
Q

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A

We are astounded at how one man, in one lifetime

293
Q

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A

can screw so many, so well.

294
Q

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A

With rigorous training he’s built up his stamina.

295
Q

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A

He’s spent every living minute just screwing.

296
Q

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A

Let’s replicate his methods.

297
Q

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A

Tomorrow ICE students will go across the globe.

298
Q

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A

Wherever we go, we promise to screw.

299
Q

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A

We’ll hoist this screwer’s flag all over the world.

300
Q

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A

We’ll show the world that our capacity to screw…

301
Q

add

A

cannot be matched by any student…

302
Q

add

A

anywhere on the planet.

303
Q

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A

Mr. Minister. Good evening.

304
Q

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A

You have given this institution what it sorely needs…

305
Q

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A

NAME?

306
Q

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A

It’s booty, stupid. Bosom means…

307
Q

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A

What nonsense! That’s insulting.

308
Q

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A

Everyone has a bosom, but it remains pocketed.

309
Q

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A

No one offers it so readily.

310
Q

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A

Vulgar fellow!

311
Q

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A

You have generously offered your bosom…

312
Q

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A

to this relentless screwer.

313
Q

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A

Now see how he makes it grow.

314
Q

add

A

Is this what you teach here, Director?

315
Q

add

A

On this august occasion, here’s a Sanskrit verse…

316
Q

add

A

Listen to this - the might of his fart in verse.

317
Q

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A

A good loud fart is honorable.

318
Q

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A

‘Fart’? Go, Silencer.

319
Q

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A

A medium fart is tolerable.

320
Q

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A

Softer windbreaks are terrible.

321
Q

add

A

And the silent ones unbearable.

322
Q

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A

That’s what mindless cramming does to you.

323
Q

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A

Cramming may see you through four years of college,

324
Q

add

A

but it will ‘screw’ you for the next 40 years.

325
Q

add

A

He still doesn’t get it.

326
Q

add

A

‘Medium fart is tolerable’… Unbelievable!

327
Q

add

A

You’re a poet, Rancho. How did you think of this?

328
Q

add

A

That was fun. He didn’t know what hit him.

329
Q

add

A

You swines! What did I ever do to you?

330
Q

add

A

Sorry man. Don’t take it personally.

331
Q

add

A

I will.

332
Q

add

A

Chatur Ramalingam will never forget this insult.

333
Q

add

A

I’ll think of it every minute, every second of my life.

334
Q

add

A

Sorry man. That was a demo for Raju - Don’t cram blindly.

335
Q

add

A

Understand and enjoy the wonders of Science.

336
Q

add

A

I’m not here to enjoy Science.

337
Q

add

A

So You’re here to screw Science?

338
Q

add

A

Go ahead. Laugh at my methods.

339
Q

add

A

But one day these methods will bring me success.

340
Q

add

A

That day I’ll laugh and you’ll cry.

341
Q

add

A

You’re on the wrong track again. Don’t chase success.

342
Q

add

A

Become a good engineer and success will chase you.

343
Q

add

A

These ideals don’t work in the real world.

344
Q

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A

You take your train, l’ll take mine.

345
Q

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A

Ten years from now we’ll meet at the same station.

346
Q

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A

Same day. Same place. We’ll see who’s more successful.

347
Q

add

A

You… or me.

348
Q

add

A

Have the balls? C’mon, bet!

349
Q

add

A

lt’s a challenge.

350
Q

add

A

Watch it!

351
Q

add

A

What’s he writing?

352
Q

add

A

Don’t forget this date.

353
Q

add

A

l’m not used to such expensive gifts, Suhas.

354
Q

add

A

Get used to them, Pia.

355
Q

add

A

You’re gonna be Suhas Tandon’s wife.

356
Q

add

A

Where’s the bill, man?

357
Q

add

A

l’ll be back.

358
Q

add

A

NAME?

359
Q

add

A

Don’t lie.

360
Q

add

A

Um… Yeah.

361
Q

add

A
  • What’s your problem with dad? - l have no problem.
362
Q

add

A

l’m making an inverter named after him. Look… Oh.

363
Q

add

A

Why’re you harassing him?

364
Q

add

A

‘Cause he runs a factory, not a college.

365
Q

add

A

Churning out asses. Like that one.

366
Q

add

A

She destroyed it, man.

367
Q

add

A

How dare you call him an ass?

368
Q

add

A

He is one! First Engineering, then MBA…

369
Q

add

A

then becomes a banker in the USA.

370
Q

add

A

Because it rakes in more money?

371
Q

add

A

Life for him is just a profit-loss statement.

372
Q

add

A

He sees profit in you, so he’s with you.

373
Q

add

A

Director’s daughter, doctor in the making… Good for his image!

374
Q

add

A

lt’s not you he cares for.

375
Q

add

A

Who do you think you are?

376
Q

add

A

What do you mean he doesn’t care for me?

377
Q

add

A

New watch? One moment.

378
Q

add

A

You always need a demo.

379
Q

add

A

Hey Suhas!

380
Q

add

A

Where were you?

381
Q

add

A

She’s looking for her watch.

382
Q

add

A

What? You lost the watch?

383
Q

add

A

Never mind. Get another.

384
Q

add

A

lt cost 400,000!

385
Q

add

A

Mine’s just 250/- but keeps the same time.

386
Q

add

A

Shut up! How could you be so careless, Pia?

387
Q

add

A

This callous attitude is disgusting. lt’s disrespectful!

388
Q

add

A

That was a limited edition watch.

389
Q

add

A

Now wear your ancient piece of junk at dinner.

390
Q

add

A

What’re you staring at?

391
Q

add

A

Here come the tears! Real mature, Pia.

392
Q

add

A

l can’t handle this.

393
Q

add

A

Stop crying and look for it.

394
Q

add

A

Find another wrist for this watch… Ass!

395
Q

add

A

Hey, you’re awesome. Called him an ass to his face.

396
Q

add

A

Get lost!

397
Q

add

A

lt’s too noisy here.

398
Q

add

A

She’s saying ‘Thank you’, l hear ‘Get lost’.

399
Q

add

A
  • l said ‘Get lost’. - Don’t get so uptight.
400
Q

add

A

Actually, you never really loved him.

401
Q

add

A

What do you mean?

402
Q

add

A

When you see him, do the winds whisper a melody?

403
Q

add

A

Your scarf flies in slow motion?

404
Q

add

A

The Moon appears gigantic?

405
Q

add

A

That happens in movies, not in life.

406
Q

add

A

Happens in life too - if you love a person…

407
Q

add

A

not an ass.

408
Q

add

A

Hello. What?

409
Q

add

A

Oh God! Ok, l’m on my way.

410
Q

add

A

You’re a medical student, right? Need your help.

411
Q

add

A
  • lt’s an emergency, please. - What?
412
Q

add

A

Please come with me. What’s that oath you doctors take -

413
Q

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A

You’ll never deny a patient help… The Hippocratic Oath.

414
Q

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A

Please help me, it’s an emergency.

415
Q

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A

You gatecrash my sister’s wedding, break off my engagement…

416
Q

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A

my dad is popping BP pills because of you…

417
Q

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A

and here l am, helping you!

418
Q

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A

Unbelievable!

419
Q

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A

This Hippocratic Oath - lt’s really done us in!

420
Q

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A
  • Where’s Raju, ma’am? - Gone to get a cab.
421
Q

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A

Called the ambulance two hours ago.

422
Q

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A

ln this country, pizza reaches in 30 minutes…

423
Q

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A

but an ambulance…

424
Q

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A

He needs hospitalization. Urgently!

425
Q

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A

Hey stop!

426
Q

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A

Move, it’s an emergency!

427
Q

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A

Move… move…

428
Q

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A

Doctor, emergency!

429
Q

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A

That’s the patient.

430
Q

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A

Keep this. Hey, here’s Raju.

431
Q

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A

What the hell! You brought dad on the scooter.

432
Q

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A

Should l’ve sent him by courier?

433
Q

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A

No wisecracks on dads profession! Where is he?

434
Q

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A

Go ask the doctor.

435
Q

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A

Close call, Pia. A little delay, we’d have lost him.

436
Q

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A

Glad you didn’t wait for an ambulance and got him on the scooter.

437
Q

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A

Call me if there’s a problem.

438
Q

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A

Rancho! Thank you…

439
Q

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A

Thanking your buddies! Silencer teaching you manners?

440
Q

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A

Didn’t he teach you - A friend is man’s greatest bosom?

441
Q

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A

Go on now. You have an exam tomorrow.

442
Q

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A

Exams we have many… Dad mostly just one!

443
Q

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A

We won’t budge from here without the Postmaster.

444
Q

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A

Don’t worry!

445
Q

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A

Rancho, forgive me. l was scared.

446
Q

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A

lt’s ok. Quiet, now.

447
Q

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A

Please forgive me.

448
Q

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A

lt’s ok, calm down. Go see your dad.

449
Q

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A

And don’t go with that weepy face.

450
Q

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A

Thanks buddy.

451
Q

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A

Natty scooter. Saved a life. How much does it cost?

452
Q

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A

Pour some mint sauce on it. l’ll tell you.

453
Q

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A

Hey, happy lndependence Day.

454
Q

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A

Today isn’t lndependence Day.

455
Q

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A

For you it is! Now you’re free to wear your mom’s watch.

456
Q

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A

No ass can say it’s an ancient piece of junk.

457
Q

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A

Hey.

458
Q

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A

How do you know it was mom’s watch?

459
Q

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A

At your sister’s wedding, you wore sparkling new clothes.

460
Q

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A

Only the watch was old.

461
Q

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A

What could that mean?

462
Q

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A

You really missed your mom that day, didn’t you?

463
Q

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A

Yes.

464
Q

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A

Your mom must’ve been really beautiful.

465
Q

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A

Yes. How do you know?

466
Q

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A

Seen your dad.

467
Q

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A

‘Life is a race. lf you don’t run fast

468
Q

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A

you’ll be a broken egg … cuckoo bird.’

469
Q

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A

You…

470
Q

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A

Hello. Wake up.

471
Q

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A
  • Huh… Postmaster’s dead? - What!
472
Q

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A

No, stupid.

473
Q

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A

lt’s 8.30, your exam is at 9.

474
Q

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A

But we can’t leave him alone.

475
Q

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A

I’m here. It’s a matter of three hours.

476
Q

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A

Take my scooter. It’s getting late.

477
Q

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A

Hey…

478
Q

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A

Gosh, what an ancient watch.

479
Q

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A

Go.

480
Q

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A
  • Sorry, we’re late. - It was an emergency.
481
Q

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A

Settle down there.

482
Q

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A

Sir, they’re still writing.

483
Q

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A

Hello. Time up.

484
Q

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A

Please, five minutes. We started half an hour late.

485
Q

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A

It was an emergency.

486
Q

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A

He glared at us like we’d asked for both his kidneys.

487
Q

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A

But we continued writing.

488
Q

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A

He continued arranging the answer sheets.

489
Q

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A

Done, sir.

490
Q

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A

You’re late. I can’t accept these.

491
Q

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A

Sir, please, sir.

492
Q

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A

Sir, do you know who we are?

493
Q

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A

Prime Ministers son? Even then…

494
Q

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A

I will not accept your paper.

495
Q

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A

Do you know our names and roll numbers?

496
Q

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A

No…

497
Q

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A

Who are you?

498
Q

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A

He doesn’t know - Run!

499
Q

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A

Hey, what’s your roll number?

500
Q

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A

Where the hell are their papers?