chapter 8 textbook

Question 1

Eros

Answer 1

The erotic lover finds good looks compelling and seeks an intense, passionate relationship.

Question 2

Ludus

Answer 2

The ludic lover considers love to be a game and likes to play the field.

Question 3

Mania

Answer 3

The manic lover is demanding, possessive, and excitable.

Question 4

Agape

Answer 4

The agapic lover is altruistic and dutiful.

Question 5

Pragma

Answer 5

The pragmatic lover is practical, careful, and logical in seeking a mate.

Question 6

Coolidge effect,

Answer 6

novelty causes sexual arousal in other species: If a male rat is caged with a female in estrus, he’ll mate with her repeatedly until he appears to be sexually exhausted; however, if the first female is then replaced with another receptive female, the male will mount her with renewed interest and vigor. By continuing to replace an old partner with a new one, researchers can elicit two to three times as many ejaculations from the male as would have occurred with only the single female

Question 7

A Brief History of Love

Answer 7

Different societies have held very different perspectives on love, and only recently has love been associated with marriage.

Question 8

The Triangular Theory of Love.

Answer 8

Intimacy, passion, and commitment are thought to
combine to produce eight different types of love.

Question 9

Romantic, Passionate Love

Answer 9

Passion (which increases when a person becomes aroused for any reason) and intimacy combine to form romantic love. It is characterized by idealized evaluations of one’s partner.

Question 10

Companionate Love.

Answer 10

Commitment and intimacy combine to form companionate love, a deep friendship with someone with whom one’s life is intertwined. Happy spouses usually say that they are good friends.

Question 11

Compassionate Love.

Answer 11

Intimacy combines with selfless caring for the beloved to form compassionate love. Compassionate acts enhance relationships.

Question 12

Styles of Loving.

Answer 12

Six themes in love experiences that are differentially correlated with the various types of love have also been identified.

Question 13

Culture and love

Answer 13

Love is much the same around the world, but cultural nuances exist.

Question 14

attachment style and love

Answer 14

Secure people enjoy stronger experiences of romantic, companionate, and compassionate love than insecure people do.

Question 15

Age and love

Answer 15

People mellow with age, experiencing less intense love as time goes by.

Question 16

Men and Women and love

Answer 16

Men and women are more similar than different when it comes to love. However, women pick their lovers more carefully and fall in love less quickly than men do.

Question 17

Does Love Last?

Answer 17

In most—but not all—cases, romantic love decreases after people marry, sometimes quite rapidly.

Question 18

Why Doesn’t Romantic Love Last?

Answer 18

Romance and passion involve fantasy, novelty, and arousal, and each fades with time. The Coolidge effect occurs when novelty increases sexual arousal.

Question 19

intimacy

Answer 19

which includes the feelings of warmth, understanding, trust, support, and sharing that often character- ize loving relationships.

Question 20

passion

Answer 20

hich is characterized by physical arousal and desire, excitement, and need. Passion often takes the form of sexual longing, but any strong emotional need that is satisfied by one’s partner fits this category.

Question 21

commitment

Answer 21

which includes feelings of per- manence, stability, and the decisions to devote oneself to a relationship and to work to maintain it. Commitment is mainly cognitive in nature, whereas intimacy is emo- tional and passion is a motive, or drive.

Question 22

Nonlove

Answer 22

If intimacy, passion, and commitment are all absent, love does not exist. Instead, you have a casual, superficial, uncommitted relationship between people who are probably just acquaintances, not friends.

Question 23

Liking

Answer 23

Liking occurs when intimacy is high but passion and commitment are very low. Liking occurs in friendships with real closeness and warmth that do not arouse passion or the expectation that you will spend the rest of your life with that person. If a friend does arouse passion or is missed terribly when he or she is gone, the relationship has gone beyond liking and has become something else.

Question 24

Infatuation

Answer 24

Strong passion in the absence of intimacy or commitment is infatua- tion, which is what people experience when they are aroused by others they barely know. Sternberg (1987) admits that he pined away for a girl in his 10th-grade biology class whom he never got up the courage to get to know. This, he now acknowledges, was nothing but passion. He was infatuated with her.

Question 25

Empty love.

Answer 25

Commitment without intimacy or passion is empty love. In Western cultures, this type of love may occur in burned-out relationships in which the warmth and passion have died, and the decision to stay together is the only thing that remains. However, in other cultures in which marriages are arranged, empty love may be the first, rather than final, stage in the spouses’ lives together.

Question 26

Romantic love.

Answer 26

When high intimacy and passion occur together, people experience romantic love. Thus, one way to think about romantic love is as a combination of liking and infatuation. People often become committed to their romances, but Stern- berg argues that commitment is not a defining characteristic of romantic love.

Question 27

Companionate love.

Answer 27

Intimacy and commitment combine to form love for a close companion, or companionate love. Here, closeness, communication, and sharing are coupled with substantial investment in the relationship as the partners work to maintain a deep, long-term friendship. Companionate love is epitomized by a long, happy marriage in which the couple’s youthful passion has gradually died down.

Question 28

Fatuous love.

Answer 28

Passion and commitment in the absence of intimacy create a foolish experience called fatuous love. (“Fatuous” means “stupid” and “lacking substance.”) This type of love can occur in whirlwind courtships in which two partners marry quickly on the basis of overwhelming passion but don’t know (or necessarily like) each other very well. In a sense, such lovers invest a lot in an infatuation—and that’s a risky business.

Question 29

Consummate love

Answer 29

Finally, when intimacy, passion, and commitment are all present to a substantial degree, people experience “complete,” or consummate, love. This is the type of love many people seek, but Sternberg (1987) suggests that it’s a lot like losing weight: easy to do for a while, but hard to maintain over time.