Personality and Personal history. Flashcards

1
Q

What is the most critical component when looking at relationship dynamics?

A

That it is made of two separate individuals

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2
Q

What is a personality

A

The characteristics that make you who you are, distinct from everyone else

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3
Q

What are the three main points that describe personality?

A
  • Stable over time
  • Consistent across situations
  • Internal coherence for the individual
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4
Q

What are the big five personality traits?

A
  • Negative affectivity
  • Extraversion
  • Openness
  • Agreeableness
  • Conscientiousness
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5
Q

What is “Negative affectivity”?

A

Inclination to experience unpleasant emotions

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6
Q

What is Extraversion?

A

Preferences for social interactions and lively activity.

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7
Q

What is openness?

A

Receptiveness to ideas, approaches, and experiences

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8
Q

What is agreeableness?

A

Selfless concern for others; generous, trusting

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9
Q

What is conscientiousness

A

Degree of discipline and organization

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10
Q

In regards to scientific research, what personality trait has the greatest effect on a relationship?

A

Neuroticism/negative Affectivity

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11
Q

People with higher neuroticism interpret their partners behaviors in what way?

A

They see them more negatively.

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12
Q

Are the interpretations of people who are neurotic stable or fluid over time?

A

They are stable and rigid over time.

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13
Q

Interactions in problem solving are….

A

More negative with higher neuroticism.

It is seen as more threatening for Neurotic individuals.

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14
Q

What is a key predictor with relationship quality in adulthood?

A

Observing Neurotic behaviors in children as young as 3 years old predict lower relationship quality as an adult.

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15
Q

Do the effects of neuroticisim change whether one or both partners are highly neurotic?

A

Nope, it is very stable.

Having one being neurotic and the other not will not have any different impact if they both were

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16
Q

What is one aspect of Neurotisim that has one of the biggest effects on Relationships?

A

Self-esteem.

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17
Q

like aspects of personality, self esteem tends to have a __________ stability over time

A

Rank - order

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18
Q

How does self-esteem effect relationship functioning?

A

Through behavior and through perceptions of the partners behavior

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19
Q

What are the four steps in the Dependency Regulation model?

A
  1. The personal experiences of low self esteem
  2. leads individuals to underestimate he partners positive feelings for them and their relationship
  3. causing them to devalue the partner, to feel hurt and neglected
  4. Leading them (and their partner) to be pessimistic and unsatisfied in the relationship, further reinforcing….Back to 1.
20
Q

Can personality change?

A

Yes, to a degree.

They are more stable than fluid overall.

21
Q

When people start new intimate relationships, what increases and what decreases?

A

Their conscientiousness, ectraversion, and self-esteem all increase

Their neuroticism decreases

22
Q

Of all relationships, what has the most pronounced effects on personality?

A

partnership.

23
Q

Is it just being on a relationship positively effect a persons personality?

A

Yes, kinda.

Being in a GOOD and healthy relationship see greater changes in personality

24
Q

What are the two forces that all relationships have within them?

A

The push to be together

The push to be apart

25
Q

What is relationship differntation?

A

The process through which one manages the forces of togetherness and Independence

26
Q

What happens with well-differentiated people?

A
  • they maintain one’s identity when faces with pressures for togetherness
  • Maintain emotional connection while holding unique beliefs, values, and opinions.
27
Q

What are the characteristics of a solid sense of self?

A
  • Understanding of self comes from within
  • Acceptance of self comes from within
  • Ability to tolerate differences
28
Q

what are the characteristics of a pseudo sense of self?

A
  • Beliefs, values, and opinions come from the population at a larger or are adopted from others
  • Looks to others for validation of self worth
  • Differences cannot be tolerated because they represent a threat to the self.
29
Q

Those who have low differentiation maintain individuality and togetherness in extreme ways, how so:

A

Extreme individuality

Extreme togetherness

30
Q

What is extreme individuality

A
  • Cut-off: Holds own beliefs, values, and opinions but cannot maintain connections with those that do not hold the same beliefs, values, and opinions
31
Q

What is Extreme Togetherness?

A
  • sacrifices own sense of self to maintain connection, at all costs
  • Enmeshment: Emotional system is shared between multiple people
32
Q

Highly differentiated people ________their partners.

A

do not need

33
Q

Are people who are highly differentiated scared of conflict?

A

No, they are able to manage their own emotions thus they don’t mind conflict.

34
Q

Differences in differentiation represent what effect on relationships?

A

It is a threat, only if you cannot handle the differences.

Some people cannot handle the idea that their partner does not need them.

35
Q

True or false:

Highly differentiated people are able to tolerate pain for growth

A

True.

This allows for greater intimacy within a relationship

36
Q

Can someone become more differentiated?

A

The context of an intimate relationship is the best environment to become more differentiated

37
Q

True or false:

Deeper intimacy is a potent motivator for increasing differentiation?

A

True

38
Q

What is the greatest foundation to allow differences to be confronted?

A

Effective communication.

39
Q

Who knows you best, scientifically?

A

Your intimate partner

40
Q

What are the four foundations fro change?

A
  1. solid flexible self
  2. Quiet mind-calming heart
  3. Grounded responding
  4. Meaningful endurance.
41
Q

What is a key factor of a highly differentiated person?

A

The ability to stand on your own two feet.

42
Q

What is a solid flexible self?

A

The ability to be clear about who you are and what you are about

43
Q

What is quiet mind-calm heart

A

Allows you to regulate your own emotions, feelings, and anxieties.

44
Q

What is grounded responding?

A

The ability to stay calm and nit overreact, rather than creating distance and withdrawing when your partner gets upset or anxious

45
Q

What is meaningful endurance?

A

Being able to step up and face issues that bedevil you and your relationship, and the ability to tolerate discomfort for the sake of growth.