Chapter 1 - LISTENING AS A COACH Flashcards
What is the primary difference between listening as a coach and everyday listening?
Listening as a coach includes intentional focus and the intention to be of service without an agenda.
Who is considered the father of modern counseling?
Carl Rogers
What does active listening, accompanied by unconditional positive regard, support?
Tremendous positive changes.
What does a coach’s ability to listen communicate to the client?
Fundamental acceptance of the client.
Why can coaching feel therapeutic?
Clients experience patient listening that they seldom receive from others.
What is meant by creating a ‘sacred, inspiring space’ in coaching?
A space where clients experience the impact of powerful listening.
What happens if a coach fails to listen patiently?
The client’s trust will erode.
List one form of lapse in a coach’s listening ability.
- Interrupting clients
- Speaking too soon after clients finish
- Attending superficially
- Multitasking
- Random movements
What is the importance of being present in the moment for a coach?
It models and emphasizes the value of presence during a session.
What are the three main forms of listening used by coaches?
- Listening to
- Listening for
- Listening with
What is ‘Listening To’ in the context of coaching?
Listening to what the client says and does not say, including the story behind the words.
What is a basic skill in active listening?
Knowing when and how to mirror what was heard.
What is ‘Listening For’ in coaching?
Listening in search of the client’s vision, values, commitment, and purpose.
What should coaches avoid listening for?
Solutions or problems.
How does listening for a solution affect the coaching process?
It turns the client into a problem and distorts the process.
What is a metaphor used to explain different coaching styles?
Flying from Los Angeles to New York versus driving.
What does ‘Listening With’ involve?
Listening with the whole self, including heart, intuition, and body.
What does listening with the heart allow coaches to do?
Resonate with clients and notice emerging emotions.
What is the significance of the heart’s intrinsic nervous system?
It sends more signals to the brain than vice versa.
What is the difference between ‘me too’ listening and appropriate self-disclosure?
‘Me too’ listening shifts focus away from the client, while appropriate self-disclosure enhances learning or connection.
What are the two purposes of self-disclosure in coaching?
- To increase connection with the client
- To function as a learning point
What is the link between authenticity and leadership according to Dr. Robert Terry?
Authenticity calls us to be true to ourselves and the world.
What is transference in psychological terms?
The projection of feelings or attitudes from one person to another.
What is the primary difference between listening as therapists and listening as coaches?
Coaches share their intuition freely with clients in a partnership relationship.
Define transference in the context of coaching.
Transference is when a person unconsciously brings their experience and feelings from another situation into a current one.
What is countertransference?
Countertransference occurs when coaches have internal reactions based on something in their own life during coaching conversations.
What is the ‘Big Five’ in coaching?
The Big Five is a coaching template that includes: * Intention and Attention * Mindset * Skills and Capabilities * Habits and Behaviors * Energy.
What does ‘Intention and Attention’ refer to in coaching?
It refers to the elements of clients’ life and work that draw their attention and are related to their goals.
Why is clarity of focus important in coaching?
Clarity of focus helps clients articulate goals and understand what needs to change to achieve them.
Fill in the blank: Clarifying focus in coaching is like charting a course on a _______.
[sailboat]
What mindset do coaches look for in clients?
Coaches look for whether clients have a helpful or limiting mindset regarding their experiences and goals.
How can a client’s mindset affect their progress?
A limiting mindset can hinder clients from moving forward, even towards set goals.
What are skills and capabilities in coaching?
Skills are learnable and teachable, while capabilities are developed and generally not taught.
What is a common example of a capability in coaching?
A client’s ability to tolerate ambiguity without rushing to action.
What are habits and behaviors in the context of coaching?
They are automatic actions, practices, and patterns in physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual realms.
True or False: Coaches should label clients’ habits as good or bad.
False
What does TOMA stand for in business coaching?
Top-of-Mind Awareness.
What does energy refer to in coaching?
Energy refers to the clients’ ability to bring forth appropriate amounts of physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual energy.
How can a coach perceive a client’s energy during sessions?
Coaches can sense clients’ energy through the enthusiasm they express about their goals.
What should coaches avoid focusing on during listening?
Coaching is not about listening for problems or pathologies.
What is a significant barrier for individuals in moving forward?
Energy drainers
Individuals often lack the energy required to progress due to various drainers in their lives.
What should coaching focus on instead of problems?
Possibilities, goals, dreams, and aspirations
Coaching aims to harness and expand on clients’ strengths rather than identifying and solving problems.
How does listening for solutions affect the coaching process?
It diminishes the humanness of the client
Listening for solutions can distort the coaching process by imposing an artificial agenda.
What is the recommended listening approach for coaches?
Listening for possibilities
Coaches should remain open to clients’ creativity and avoid pushing for quick conclusions.
What is the role of advising or training in coaching?
Limited and requires client permission
Coaches may teach skills briefly but must label this work and obtain permission from clients.
What distinguishes awareness-based coaching from solution-focused coaching?
Focus on identity-level shifts
Awareness-based coaching emphasizes understanding beliefs and fears rather than just altering activities.
What percentage of time should coaches spend listening according to Dave Ellis?
80 percent
This emphasizes the importance of listening in creating a strong coaching foundation.
What is one method coaches use to affirm clients?
Feeding back what inspires clients
This helps clients feel heard and acknowledged in their goals.
What should be clarified when coaches feed back clients’ desires?
Key points from clients’ descriptions
This helps clients focus their attention on what they truly want.
What type of question might a coach ask to generate new possibilities?
What can you think of that would help you take the first steps toward this goal?
This encourages clients to explore options and take initiative.
What is the primary goal of a coach’s listening in the early relationship?
Helping clients discover their wants and beliefs
The coach’s listening aids clients in understanding themselves better.
