Chapter 5 - Intimate Relationships and Communication

Question 1

Carl Rodgers Conditions for healthy relationships

Answer 1

• Genuineness
• Empathy
• Unconditional Positive Regard

Question 2

Genuineness

Answer 2

Refers to honest and accurate communication of thoughts and feelings.

Question 3

Empathy

Answer 3

Stepping into anothers’ shoes and trying to understand someone else’s position regardless of personal feeling

Question 4

Unconditional Positive Regard

Answer 4

The ability to experience another person without judgement and negative feelings.

Question 5

When does identity begin to form?

Answer 5

Childhood

Question 6

Gender Role

Answer 6

The activities, abilities, and characteristics deemed culturally appropriate for us based on our sex.

Question 7

Gender Identity

Answer 7

Internal sense of self
(May not match with assigned gender role)

Question 8

Socialization

Answer 8

The process of learning to behave in a way that is acceptable to society.

Question 9

Attatchment

Answer 9

The emotional tie between an infant and their caregiver or between two people in an intimate relationship.

Question 10

Anxious/Avoidant Attachment

Answer 10

Present in people whose parents were either engulfing or neglectful.
These people are theorized to run from relationships and be uncomfortable being close to others

Question 11

Characteristics of Healthy Friendships

Answer 11

Companionship
Respect
Acceptance
Help
Trust
Loyalty
Mutuality
Reciprocity

Question 12

Companionship

Answer 12

The good feeling you have when you’re with someone else. Friends are usually relaxed and happy together. They typically share common interests and values. Friends can also be tense and unhappy with each other, but even on bad days, they support one another.

Question 13

Respect

Answer 13

Friends respect each other’s feelings and opinions and work to resolve their differences without demeaning or insulting eachother.

Question 14

Acceptance

Answer 14

Friends accept each other “Warts and All.” They feel free to be themselves and express their feelings honestly without fear of ridicule or criticism.

Question 15

Help

Answer 15

Friends know they can rely on each other in times of need. Help may include sharing time, energy, and material goods.

Question 16

Trust

Answer 16

Friends will not intentionally hurt each other. They feel safe confiding in one another.

Question 17

Loyalty

Answer 17

Friends can count on one another. In conflicts, friends will stand up for one another rather than joining the opposition.

Question 18

Mutuality

Answer 18

Friends retain their individual identities, but close friendships are characterized by a sense of mutuality. “What affects me affects you”. Friends share ups and downs in each other’s lives.

Question 19

Reciprocity

Answer 19

Friendships are reciprocal. There is give and there is give-and-take between friends and mutual exchange of joys and burdens.

Question 20

% of 18-25 year olds who have had sex

Answer 20

65% of 18-year-olds and 93% of 25-year-olds have had sexual intercourse

Question 21

Challenges in Relationships

Answer 21

Honesty and Openness
Emotional Intelligence
Unequal or Premature Commitment
Unrealistic Expectations
Competitiveness
Balancing Time Together and Apart
Jealousy
Supportiveness

Question 22

Jealousy

Answer 22

Jealousy is the angry, painful response to a partner’s real, imagined, or possible involvement with something outside the relationship, like a person or activity.

Question 23

Unhealthy Intimate Relationships

Answer 23

Relationships in which there is abuse between partners. This can be caused by a difference in social status and/or power.

Question 24

Ending a Relationship

Answer 24

• Give the relationship a fair chance before breaking up
• Be fair and honest
• Be tactful and compassionate
• If you feel rejected, give yourself time to resolve your anger and pain.
• Recognize the value in the experience

Question 25

Problems with Digital Communication

Answer 25

• Missing nonverbal cues such as body language and tone of voice
• Promoting an idealized version of oneself
• Spying
• Checking one’s phone rather than staying present
• Publicizing more areas of one’s life

Question 26

Relationships & Expectations

Answer 26

Each partner brings hopes and expectations to a relationship. Some may be unrealistic, unfair, and ultimately damaging to the relationship. These include the following:
- Expecting your partner to change
- Assuming that your partner has all the same opinions, priorities, interests, and goals as you
- Believing a relationship will fulfill all your personal, financial, intellectual, and social needs.

Question 27

Effective Listening

Answer 27

• Provide nonverbal feedback (nodding, smiling, etc.)
• Don’t interrupt
• Listen reflectively, without jumping to “fix” the problem
• Don’t offer unsolicited advice
• Clarify your understanding by restating what they say and asking if your understanding is correct
• Be sure you are really listening, and not rehearsing a reply in your head
• Let them know you value what they are saying and that you want to understand

Question 28

Effective Speaking

Answer 28

• State your concern or issue as clearly as you can
• Use “I” statements rather than “You” statements
• Focus on behavior and not the whole person. Avoid generalizations.
• Make constructive requests (“I would like…”)
• Avoid blaming, accusing, or belittling.
• Tell the other person what you would like to have happen in the future, instead of waiting for them to mess up and then expressing anger or dissapointment.

Question 29

3 Communication Skills

Answer 29

1. Self Disclosure - revealing personal information you ordinarily wouldn’t reveal because of risks involved.
2. Listening - requires that we spend more time trying to understand another person’s “story” and less time judging, evaluating, blaming, advising, analyzing, or trying to control.
3. Feedback - a constructive response to another’s self-disclosure, acknowledging that their feelings are valid - no matter how upsetting - and offering self-disclosure in return.

Question 30

Conflict in a relationship

Answer 30

Conflict is normal in a relationship.
If it is not handled properly, it can damage or destroy the relationship
Conflict is often accompanied by anger, losing control or holding it in could be bad for the relationship and the people, so addressing the problem is crucial to resolve it.
Let yourself calm down before expressing yourself

Question 31

Steps of Conflict Resouloution

Answer 31

1. Clarify the Issue
2. Find out what each person wants
3. Determine how you can both get what you want
4. Decide how to negotiate
5. Solidify the Agreements
6. Review and Renegotiate

Question 32

Sexual Orientation

Answer 32

Who you are drawn to emotionally, romantically, and sexually.

Question 33

Queer

Answer 33

Sexual orientations other than heterosexual/straight.

Question 34

Straight/Heterosexual

Answer 34

Attraction to people of the opposite sex.

Question 35

Characteristics of Strong Families (US)

Answer 35

• Commitment
• Appreciation
• Communication
• Time Together
• Spiritual Wellness
• Stress and crisis management
• Affectionate physical contact

Question 36

Predictors of Happy Marriages

Answer 36

• Partners have realistic expectations about their relationship
• Each feels good about the personality of the other
• Partners develop friendships with other couples
• They communicate well
• They have effective ways of resolving conflicts
• They agree on religious/ethical values
• They have an egalitarian role relationship (the benefits, duties, and obligations are equally shared by the relationship partners)
• They have a good balance of individual versus joint interests and leisure activities

Question 37

Parenting styles vary according to how parents approach each of the following:

Answer 37

Demandingness - Encompasses the use of discipline and supervision, the expectation that children act responsibly and maturely, and the direct reaction to disobedience

Responsiveness - refers to the parent’s warmth and intent to facilitate independence and self-confidence in their child by being supportive, connected, and understanding of their child’s needs.

Question 38

Effective Communication

Answer 38

Comprised of Effective Speaking, Effective Listening, and generally valuing each other and what you are saying.