CHAPTER 11 Dealing with Resistance Flashcards
What is meant by ‘overcoming resistance’ in the context of client relationships?
The phrase suggests treating resistance as an adversary to be subdued, which is ineffective because resistance is an emotional process.
Why is resistance considered essential to learning?
Resistance is the early stage of surprise and is linked to underlying feelings and concerns that must be addressed.
What is the basic strategy for helping clients through resistance?
Help the resistance blow itself out, like a storm, rather than fighting it head-on.
How can a consultant encourage authenticity in clients?
By also behaving authentically and expressing observations without judgment.
What happens when you fight against client resistance?
It intensifies the resistance, leading to increased frustration and commitment to finding faults.
What are the three steps for handling resistance?
- Identify the form of resistance
- Name the resistance in neutral language
- Be quiet and let the client respond
What is the first step in handling resistance?
Identify in your own mind what form the resistance is taking by picking up cues from the manager.
What should you trust more, verbal or nonverbal messages from a client?
Trust what you see more than what you hear.
What are some signs that a client is feeling uneasy?
- Constantly moving away
- Tied up in knots
- Shaking their head
- Taking urgent calls
- Leaning into the next meeting
What is the second step in handling resistance?
State the form of resistance in a neutral, unpunishing way, known as ‘naming the resistance.’
How can you describe a client who is avoiding responsibility?
You can say, ‘You don’t see yourself as part of the problem.’
What should you do after naming the resistance?
Be quiet and let the client respond to your statement.
What is a common mistake consultants make after naming resistance?
They continue talking instead of allowing the client to take responsibility for their feelings.
What is the purpose of giving two good-faith responses to client questions?
To address the discomfort and doubts the client is expressing before recognizing the questions as resistance.
What should you do if a client repeatedly asks the same question?
Interpret it as a form of resistance and address the underlying reluctance to commit.
What is a ‘stone’ client?
A client who is resistant, withholding, and uncommunicative, making progress difficult.
List some strategies for consulting with a ‘stone’ client.
- Don’t look for approval
- Expect argument and criticism
- Minimize elaboration
- Show confidence
What should you avoid doing when dealing with a resistant client?
Taking the client’s responses personally.
True or False: A client’s behavior is a direct reflection of the consultant’s abilities.
False.
Fill in the blank: Resistance is the indirect expression of client _______.
[reservations].
What is the goal of encouraging clients to express their concerns?
To help them state their reservations directly and stop the subterfuge.
What does it mean to ‘name the resistance’?
Describing the form of resistance in neutral language to encourage direct statements from the client.
How can expressing your own feelings help in dealing with resistance?
It may encourage the client to respond authentically about their own feelings.
What should you do if a client remains a stone client?
Minimize your investment in the project and avoid pressure to be heroic.
If a stone client is someone you work with constantly or is your boss, what are two options you have?
Plan your escape or invest energy in activities outside the job.
What should you do to avoid becoming a stone yourself?
Limit the time spent around stone clients.
True or False: A client’s behavior is a direct reflection of your abilities.
False
What habit do many consultants have regarding their performance?
They often focus on self-criticism and analyze what they did wrong.
In a workshop, how many negative qualities did engineers list compared to positive ones?
8 to 10 negative qualities and an average of two positive qualities.
What is the suggested time to process a client’s reactions personally?
After six o’clock in the evening.
What should you do if you have made a mistake as a consultant?
Own up to it and improve your performance.
Why is it important to express client defenses?
Suppressing them can lead to more dangerous outbursts later.
What is a sign that you have touched something important with a client?
Defenses and resistance from the client.
What should you try to articulate when faced with a client’s question?
The underlying statement behind the question.
What is often harder than data collection in a consulting project?
Dealing with resistance from clients.
What are the critical relational moments of every project?
Staying engaged in the face of hard moments.
According to Gil Gordon, what is important in dealing with client resistance?
Picking up cues from the client is separate from putting the resistance into words.
