Integrative - Gottman Flashcards
Who are the Gottmans?
John Gottman; Julie Gottman.
Goals of Gottman Method Couples Therapy?
- Empower the couple
- Increase respect, affection, closeness = positive affect
- Break through & resolve conflict & Keep conflict discussions calm
- Problem solving skills
- Generate greater understanding between partners = shared meaning
What are the elements of the Sound Relationship House, in Gottman therapy?
- Creating Shared Meaning
- Making Dreams Come True
- Managing Conflict
- Taking a Positive Perspective
- Turning Towards, not Away
- Sharing Fondness & Admiration
- Building Love Maps
What are core elements of managing conflict, in Gottman therapy?
- Accept your partner’s influence
- Dialog about problems
- Practice self-soothing
What are the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, in Gottman therapy?
Criticism - verbally attacking the partner’s personality or character
Contempt - moral superiority; attacking the partner’s sense of self with intention to insult or psychologically abuse
Defensiveness - seeing yourself as the victim in efforts to ward off a perceived attack and reverse blame onto the partner
Stonewalling - withdrawing as a way to avoid conflict in efforts to convey disapproval, distance, and separation
What is the antidote to criticism, in Gottman therapy?
Softened startup using “I” statements
What is the antidote to defensiveness, in Gottman therapy?
Taking responsibility: Accept your partner’s perspective and own/apologize for your own wrongdoing.
What is the antidote to contempt, in Gottman therapy?
Building a culture of appreciation:
Finding gratitude for positive action; focusing on partner’s positive qualities.
What is the antidote for stonewalling, in Gottman therapy?
Taking a break to self-soothe, then coming back to re-engage
What are some assumptions of Gottman therapy?
- Therapy is primarily dyadic
- Couples need to be in regulated emotional states in order to learn how to cope with conflict and change themselves
- Therapy should be a primarily positive affective experience
- Positive Sentiment Override and a friendship base are needed for communication and to effect change
What is a Love Map, in Gottman Therapy?
When partners make the effort to get to know the little things about each other’s internal world and their life. Love Maps create a strong foundation for friendship and intimacy.
What is the role of the therapist in Gottman therapy?
- Coach
- Provide tools the couple can use and make their own
What does a therapist do in the assessment phase of Gottman therapy?
- Check if the 4 Horsemen are present and if repair is ineffective
- Check for positive affect and bids for connection
- Check what levels couple has in the Sound Relationship House
What are interventions in Gottman therapy?
- Reflecting
- Build up the Sound Relationship House
- Dreams-within-conflict
- Rapaport intervention (reflective listening)
- Labeling destructive patterns
- Teaching to take a break & self-soothe
- Encouraging positive sentiment override
- Encouraging 4 Horsemen antidotes
- Enhancing the marital friendship
How does change happen, in the view of Gottman therapy?
When the couple…
- Accept ea/o’s influence
- Decrease negative interactions
- Increase positive affect
