Week 9 Flashcards
What is curiosity relatively independent from?
personality (extraversion/intraversion)
What are the 2 main responses to novelty?
Curiosity & Anxiety
What are the different desires of curiosity vs anxiety?
curiosity gives the desire to explore whereas anxiety brings the desire to escape
What does becoming a curious person also mean?
managing anxiety
Can we learn to become curious?
positive psyc says yes
How can we begin to learn to become curious?
starts with remaining where we are despite anxiety
What are 6 reasons why to improve curiosity?
1) helps build healthy social relationships
2) curiosity and anxiety walk together (increasing curiosity decreases anxiety - nudges anxiety out of the way - great strategy)
3) related to optimal well-being
4) related to flow (intrinsic interest in task)
5) related to wisdom
6)seems to be a protective factor against aggression
What is courage?
perseverance amidst, or in the face of, fear/stress
What are the 3 main types of courage (including what are the two subsets of the 2nd type)?
1) physical - act amidst/despite physical danger - trying to prevent an injury or help an injured person
2) Psychological
a - stepping out of comfort zone to help another (this is not an accident)
b - strength to face one’s own destructive actions/habits (my thought: think about people going to counselling)
3)Morally standing up to others for what is right/taking responsibility for a situation or standing against opposition
What is vital courage?
pushing beyond an illness or other personal limiting factors to do something good ot great
What are the 3 basic features of courage?
1) Willing & intentional (work towards causing it to happen)
2) Nobel & Worthy
3) Risk (internal or external) or Difficulty
What do our heroes do?
they inspire us to be our best selves (provide a roadmap)
Are forgiveness & reconciliation the same?
No. They are 2 different entities which sometimes overlap.
What is forgiveness NOT?
-it doesn’t mean condoning/justifying/minimizing/tolerating
-it doesn’t mean forgive and forget
-it doesn’t necessarily mean reconciliation (this is controversial)
-it isn’t sentimental or quick (it can take a long time to process - it is a deep process of the heart)
What do you ideally see in forgiveness?
A shift in thinking: reduction in the desire to harm and an increase in the desire to help
What are 3 potential negative issues of forgiveness in some circumstances?
1) domestic violence (IPV - those who forgive their partners are more likely to return to violent partner)
2)maladaptive behaviors (these can sometimes be maintained through self-forgiveness)
3)cultural shame (when forgiveness reduces shame, may isolate from some cultures)
What are 2 truths regarding revenge and forgiveness?
1) desire for revenge is a built in feature of human nature
2)the capacity for forgiveness is also a built in feature of human nature (widespread in humanity & animals like chimps as well)
Is there a “silver bullet” for forgiveness?
No - but all people can learn to forgive
What makes forgiveness easier?
if presume that people have forgiveness in their nature
What did Everett Worthington study & what did he find?
The dilemma of unforgiveness
-found that may compromise immune system
What are 3 benefits of forgiveness?
1) Physical (seem to increase with age - older people seem to forgive more and feel forgiven by God)
2) increased satisfaction with life, more positive emotions, less negative emotions and fewer symptoms of physical illness
3) regulation of negative emotions
What are 3 conditions that make up the first of three variables in forgiveness? (think of my thought process)
1) Care worthiness (do we believe that the person who harmed us is worth caring + concern
2) Expected value (do we believe that we will/need to continue to interact with this person)
3)Safety (what’s the likelihood of further hurt)
What is the second variable in forgiveness?
FFM (5 Factor Model) of Personality
a) Agreeableness & neuroticism
1. Correlated with 3 conditions of love.
2. Predicts less resentment + more forgiveness
· Neuroticism is the opposite
b) Extraversion
a) Related to revengefulness
1. Extroverts need excitement and revenge provides the excitement
B) related to forgiveness
c) Conscientiousness
1. Related to vengefulness.
2. Consciences individuals are concerned with justice and duty
3) Forgiveness and Faith
What are the 2 types of forgiveness?
1) Self-forgiveness (challenging because it is 1 person playing 2 roles & because of the tendency to confuse self-compassion with self-forgiveness)
2) Forgiving God (“resolving anger towards God” – theological & ethical issue because ‘how can you forgive someone who does no wrong?’)
What are Lyubomirsky’s 2 tips to aid in forgiveness & (a 3rd from Worthington & Wade)?
1) appreciate being forgiven (brings gratitude & humility - it is a heroic & courageous choice to forgive)
2)learn about others who have successfully forgiven
3) Amount of time spent trying to forgive makes a difference
What does 1 hour of trying to forgive do?
Bring you 1 S.D. closer to forgiveness
Why is deciding to try to forgive a good thing?
because it shows effort and intention
What does pos psych add to religion regarding forgiveness?
pos psych gives us mechanisms for forgiveness - the Bible is not a cookbook and is not meant to be one
What does forgiveness easily veer to?
self-interest
What is SO important in forgiveness?
focus on others
What kind of act is forgiveness?
it is a spiritual act, an act of worship, a community act (not an individual act), and an act that fosters healing & growth
What does the Church do regarding forgiveness?
reminds us why it matters - that we were 1st forgiven so it is a social responsibility
(all cultures say to give back when we are given something)
