Module 5: Love and Sexuality Flashcards
what are the 3 elements of Robert Sternberg’s triangle of love
- intimacy
- passion
- commitment
define intimacy
- emotional connectedness
- not sex
define passion
romantic feelings and physical sexual desire
define commitmentt
desire to maintain the relationship
how many types of love are in Sternberg’s triangle of love
8
describe infatuation love
- passion only
- lust
- heart rules head
- can become obsessed with “loved” one
- rejects advice from friends and family
describe liking love
- intimacy only
- desire to be connected to another person but not long term
- sex would ruin the friendship
- can grow to full love relationship (consummate love) and often is the start of strong marriage
describe empty love
- commitment only
- fallen out of love but stay together for children, finances, habit, etc.
- often one or both have affairs (physical or emotional)
describe romantic love
- passion and intimacy
- they are the one for you, for now
- often different lifetime plans/goals and/or different values
- personalities are often too much alike
- high school or college relationships
describe companionate love
- intimacy and commitment
- live together but no sex
- best friends
- may be result of dysfunction (emotional or physical) or perceived dysfunction
- sometimes not a mutual decision
- may start as consummate love but lose passion
describe fatuous love
- passion and commitment
- lose ability to communicate emotions
- big life changes can cause consummate love to become fatuous (kids, etc.)
describe non-love
no passion, intimacy, or commitment
describe consummate love
intimacy, passion, and commitment
list expressions of intimacy
- communicating feelings through deep conversations and being vulnerable
- sharing one’s possessions
- sharing oneself
- sharing one’s time
- offering emotional support
list expressions of passion
- kissing
- hugging
- touching
- having sex
list expressions of commitment
- fidelity (physical and emotional)
- staying with the relationship through hard times
- getting engaged
- getting married
who is more likely to be upset by an emotional affair
women
who is more likely to be upset by a physical affair
men
list similarities between sex and love
- represents intense emotions
- involves physiological changes
- has a cognitive component
- is expressed in various ways
- need increases with deprivation
describe physiological changes of love
- happy hormones like dopamine are released
- blushing
describe physiological changes of sex
- increased heart rate and respiration rate
- erection, elongation of vaginal canal
what is the cognitive component of sex
- consent
- was it enjoyable
how is love different from sex
- love is crucial to human happiness
- love is pervasive (in many different areas of life)
- love is more selective
how is sex different from love
- the value of sex does not supersede love
- sexual feelings are localized (erogenous zones)
- sex is less selective
what are cultural factors for selecting a mate
- endogamy
- exogamy
describe endogamy
cultural expectation that one will find a mate within own social class, race, religion, age group
describe exogamy
expectation that one will marry outside own family group (no incest)
what is the sociological theory for selecting a mate
homogamy
describe homogamy
- we become attracted to one who has characteristics similar to ourselves (race, age, religion, IQ, and social/sexual behavior)
- not about personality
what are psychological theories for selecting a mate
- complementary needs theory (ego-deal theory)
- exchange theory
describe complementary needs theory (ego-ideal theory)
one tends to select a mate who has personality characteristics lacking is oneself (opposites attract)
describe exchange theory
- assesses which potential mate has greatest rewards at lowest costs (weighing pros and cons)
- rewards: behaviors, resources, words you value
- costs: unpleasant aspects
- profit occurs when rewards exceed costs
