Mathematics & Money Jokes Flashcards
Incorporate humorous scenarios or dialogues involving numbers, calculations, or financial situations.
What’s that joke about gross pay?
It’s called gross pay because it’s disgusting to see how much money you would have made before taxes.
Explanation: Gross pay is an individual’s total earnings throughout a given period before any deductions are made.
What’s that nerdy joke about an imaginary girlfriend?
My girlfriend is like the square root of -100.
A solid 10, but also imaginary.
What’s that joke about math problems?
Q: Why did the math book look so sad?
A: Because of all its problems.
What’s that joke about going to a cheap concert?
Q: What concert only costs 45 cents?
A: 50 Cent featuring Nickleback.
What’s that joke about relationships and algebra?
Relationships are a lot like algebra.
Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
What’s that joke about Sherlock Holmes?
Why didn’t Sherlock Holmes pay a lot of taxes?
Because he made brilliant deductions.
What’s that joke about a pessimistic accountant?
Q: What does the pessimistic accountant think?
A: It’s accrual world.
Tip: Pay close attention to the pronunciation of the word “accrual,” as there is a double meaning here.
In accounting, an “accrual” of something is the adding together of interest or different investments over a period of time.
When pronounced differently, it can sound like “a cruel.”
What’s that joke about ear piercings?
Q: How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?
A: A buccaneer.
What’s that joke about failing math class?
I failed math so many times at school, I can’t even count.
What’s that joke about counting?
There are three kinds of people: Those who can count and those who can’t.
What’s that joke about an accountant’s balance?
When do accountants fall over?
When they lose their balance.
Explanation: A tax balance is the difference between an amount due and an amount paid.
What’s that joke about a accountants?
Q: Why are accountants always tired after work?
A: Because their job is so taxing.
What’s that joke about multiplication tables?
Q: Where do New York City kids learn their multiplication tables?
A: Times Square.
What’s that joke about a Roth IRA?
OR that joke about soup?
My workplace offered to fund my retirement account exclusively in soup…
…I’m the first person to have a Broth IRA.
Fun fact: A Roth IRA is an individual retirement account that offers tax-free growth and tax-free withdrawals in retirement.
What’s that joke about about the IRS and a seafood restaurant?
Q: Why was the seafood restaurant being investigated by the IRS?
A: They were suspected of being a shell company in some fishy business.
Explanation: A “shell company” is often a fake business that is a front for corrupt activity or tax evasion.
