Chapter 7: Life-Situation Interventions: Interpersonal Flashcards
assertive behavior
expressing yourself and satisfying your own needs.
(acting in a way to get what one is entitled to, one’s rights, but not at the expense of someone else’s rights)
feeling good about this and not hurting others in the process
nonassertive behavior
denying your own wishes to satisfy someone else’s
sacrificing your own needs to meet someone else’s needs
(giving up what one is entitled to, one’s rights, in order not to upset the other person)
aggressive behavior
seeking to dominate or to get your own way at the expense of others
(acting in a way to get what one is entitled to, one’s rights, but at the expense of someone else’s rights)
health implications of assertiveness
assertive college students are more likely to employ safe sex, help anticipate and respond to sexual assault
more likely to communicate better with physicians, view physicians as health advisors and get mammogram
better able to resolve conflicts and communicate more effectively in response to verbal abuse
relationship of assertiveness behavior to stress
satisfaction of needs
you are usually achieving your needs while maintaining effective interpersonal relationships
relationship of non assertiveness behavior to stress
you are not satisfying your own needs, and those unsatisfied needs will become stressors
relationship of aggressiveness behavior to stress
your needs are met but at the expense of your relationship with others
assertion theory is based on…
the premise that every person has certain basic rights
assertiveness is not only a matter of WHAT you say, but also a function of ____ you say it
HOW
assertive people express themselves by …
standing straight, remain steady, directly face the person they are talking to with eye contact
speak in clear, steady voice, loud enough to be heard
speak fluently, without hesitation
nonassertive people express themselves by…
lack of eye contact, looking down or away
swaying and shifting of weight from foot to foot
whining and hesitancy when speaking
aggressive people express themselves by…
leaning forward, with glaring eyes
pointing a finger at the person
shouting
clenching fists
putting hands on hips and wagging head
DESC form
a formula for verbally expressing assertiveness consisting of …
describe the situation
express feelings
specify of how you want behavior or situation to change
consequences of behavior or situation if it doesn’t change
modus operandi
how you usually deal with conflict situations
simple procedure to resolve interpersonal conflict
active listening (paraphrasing the speakers words and feelings, also called REFLECTIVE listening)
identifying your position (stating thoughts and feelings about situation)
exploring alternative solutions (brainstorm other possibilities)
components of communication
SENDER conveys a MESSAGE through some MEDIUM to the RECEIVER of the message
to communicate effectively requires attention to each of these components
sender must be knowledgable about topic. must be believable and trusted.
message must be credible. include evidence
medium through which message is communicated should be effective.
for the message to be received as intended, the sender should know a lot about the receiver
nonverbal communication
communicating with our bodies
body posture
communication by body posture often says as much as spoken word
verbal communication
plan time to talk:
- make sure you allow enough time to discuss
- disconnect phone and don’t let others come in
- accept all feelings and verbal expression of feelings
- take a risk and describe your thoughts and feelings
- approach discussion with both of you understanding that the goal is to improve relationship
listening
beginning with agreement
replace the word “but” with “AND”. but erases everything you just said.
focus on the word “I” not “you”
avoid “why” questions
emotional intelligence is…
is the ability to accurately identify and understand one’s own emotional reactions and those of others, and to regulate ones emotions and to use them to make good decisions and act effectively
Daniel goodman was first person to define and popularize emotional intelligence
emotional intelligence model by Goleman
accurately perceive emotions in oneself and others
use emotions to facilitate thinking
understand emotional meanings
manage emotions
why is emotional intelligence important?
without it, you would not pick up on others’ feelings, or your own, that are keys to human interaction
counteract technology influence through …
meditation which enhances self awareness
technostress
is our relation to technology and how our lives are changing as a result
it lets us do more and more that we often take on too much, ending up feeling overwhelmed and stressed
type A behavior is called
polyphasic behavior
what percent of people feel uncomfortable with technology?
85%
cyberbullying
any behavior performed through electronic or digital media by individuals or groups who repeatedly communicate hostile or aggressive messages intended to inflict harm or discomfort on others
send messages or threats
spread rumors
posting hurtful or threatening message on social sites
stealing a persons account to send bad messages
pretending to be someone else to hurt someone
taking unflattering photos of someone and spread them around
sexting or sending sexually suggestive pictures about someone
those who are cyberbullied experience …
decline in academic performance
increase in dropping out of school
physical violence
suicide
depression
abuse of alcohol and other drugs
low self esteem
family problems and delinquent behavior
what community experience a greater amount of cyberbullying?
LGBTQ community
time management
assess how you spend your time -analyze how you spend your time
set goals - daily, monthly, weekly, yearly, long range
prioritize (ABC lists) - focus on goals of major importance. A list are those things that must get done. B list are things you would like to do today and need to get done. C list are things you want to do if A and B are done
schedule - schedule into day
maximize rewards
saying no
delegating
evaluating tasks once
using circular file - throw away stuff without opening and reading if you know its junk
limiting interruptions
investing time
what is social support?
belonging, being accepted, being loved, or being needed
social support comes in different forms…
tangible support ( money or use of car)
emotional support (love or caring concern)
informational support (facts or advice)
direct effect theory
views social support as a means of preventing stressors from occurring in the first place
stress buffering theory
social support helps after a stressor is encountered to help prevent that stressor from resulting in negative consequences
common sense dictates that …
social support can help prevent stressors from leading to negative consequences
