SP: Relationships and Love Flashcards
Why can studying love, relationships and attraction be difficult?
it is not always possible to make use of an experimental design
What has been utilised for a lot of research and where does this fall short?
speed dating sessions, but there is a lack of cross-cultural research.
What is attraction based on?
alluring face, a pleasant interaction or the perception of similarity.
What is the effect of a symmetrical face and body?
more attractive and likeable.
Name three more factors which are rated more attractive and give a reason for this
A clear rosy skin, average weight and shiny hair seem to signal good health
Outside of looks what else can elicit attraction?
People that look like they have access to adequate resources are deemed more attractive.
Who may find heavier women more attractive?
Men living in a culture with scarce resources find heavier women more attractive.
Why are there strong individual differences in what we deem attractive?
because judgements of attractiveness are influenced by our experience and expectations.
What is the relationship between liking and perceived physical attractiveness?
Liking increases perceived physical attractiveness and perceived physical attractiveness increases liking.
What factors effect the strength of liking someone similar?
It is greater if the qualities we share are important to us and salient.
Give four reasons why similarity helps us move from attraction to liking?
Valuing me and mine, Strive for mastery, familiarity and strive for connectedness
Why does ‘me and mine’ seem more attractive? (3)
People tend to view their own characteristics as desirable. Similarity is a significant cue to in- group membership. We also like people who like us.
How does similarity contribute to mastery?
Similarity is a key predictor of cooperation, trust and helping increases the rewards of interaction and again increases liking. People tend to interact with similar others
Give two reasons why physical proximity may increase liking
Mere exposure and positive interactions
Give three reasons why interaction can lead to increased liking
Familiarity, mastery (rewarding interactions) and connectedness (relatedness and interaction as a reward of interaction.)
When can interaction lead to disliking?
When it does not satisfy needs or is hurtful
When does acquaintanceship progress towards friendship?
Acquaintanceship will progress toward friendship when liking, attractiveness, similarity and interaction become mutually reinforcing processes.
What kind of interactions does friendship develop through?
Friendship develops through interactions that fulfil mastery and connectedness needs. The rewards that each partner gets from interaction are key in determining the course of the relationship
What do you call relationships which people offer rewards in order to receive benefits in return?
Exchange relationships
What can cloud both partners feelings about the transition?
Uncertainty and anxiety
What are meant by self disclosures?
facts about one’s life and situation, as well as inner thoughts, feelings and emotions
What are the effect of self disclosures?
Self-disclosure makes people like you more. Those who disclose more than is appropriate for the closeness of the relationship make people uncomfortable.
What is the effect of gender on self disclosure?
Women more than men
When is this s.d difference larger?
same sex relationships
How should one react to these disclosures and what effect does it have?
Reacting to disclosures with sympathetic concern is a crucial means of building greater intimacy and closeness in relationships.
Define a close relationship
A close relationship is a relationship involving strong and frequent interdependence in many domains of life
What is the effect of interdependence?
Interdependence in a relationship means that each partner’s thoughts, emotions and behaviours influence the other’s.
What is Love
Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me no more
No really, define love
Love refers to thoughts, feelings, and actions that occur when a person wishes to enter or maintain a close relationship with a specific person.
Name three forms of interdependence involved in close relationships
Cognitive, affective and behavioural interdependence
What is cognitive interdependence?
Cognitive interdependence refers to thinking about the self and the partner as parts of a whole.
What is the effect of cognitive interdependence?
Partner knowledge becomes self-knowledge.
What effect does relationship closeness have on response time to a particular stimulus?
The closer the relationship, the slower the responses that require differentiation of the two partners.
What bias becomes applicable to the other partner as the relationship becomes closer?
The self-serving bias
What is meant by behavioural interdependence?
Behavioural interdependence means that each person has a great deal of influence on the partner’s decisions, activities and plans.
What is meant by communal relationships?
Communal relationships refer to relationships in which people reward their partner out of direct concern and to show caring.
What can help relationships endure over time?
When people make decisions and take action that reflects the other rather than the self, relationships tend to endure over time.
What is meant by affective interdependence?
Affective interdependence refers to the affective bond that links close relationship partners. Each partner’s emotional well-being is deeply affected by what the other does.
Define intimacy
A positive emotional bond that includes understanding and support
How does intimacy develop? (3)
Intimacy is a positive emotional bond that includes understanding and support. Intimacy develops through self-disclosure (1), acceptance, acknowledgement and understanding in the response (2) and increased responsiveness
What is meant by social support?
Social support refers to emotional and physical coping resources provided by other people.
What can induce the effects of social support?
Believing that you have social support
What is meant by commitment?
The combined forces that hold the partners together during a relationship
How does commitment emerge? (3)
Personal satisfactions, realising you won’t get the benefits in another relationship and the number of barriers preventing you from leaving the relationship
What are the four attachment styles in close relationships?
Securely attached: Feel good about themselves and unafraid of intimacy
Dismissing: Feel good about themselves but do not trust others, avoid intimacy and not worried about the lack of it
Preoccupied: worries others don’t want their intimacy but want it
Fearful attached: Anxious about abandonment and a fear of intimacy
Define romantic love
Romantic love involves sexual feelings, a sense of intense longing for the partner, euphoric feelings of fulfilment and ecstasy when the relationship goes well and anxiety and despair when it does not.
What is passion linked to?
Passion is linked to a set of beliefs about the beloved and motivations for specific types of action
Compare what women and men may place importance on in a partner
Reproduction has a higher cost for women than for men, so men try to reproduce as often as possible, so it is important for men to focus on physical cues and since the investment for women is bigger, they tend to focus on resources.
What can arise from the threatened loss of a valued relationship
Depression and anxiety
What can result from being rejected by the partner in favour of someone else?
anger may arise due to the loss of self-esteem
What can problems in a relationship lead to?
a cycle of dissatisfaction and decline.
What is meant by accommodation?
responding to a negative action by the partner.
What is meant by constructive accomodation?
actions that help maintain the relationship, including actively discussing problems
What are four problematic types of communication that foreshadow the end of a relationship?
criticism beyond complaining about a specific event (1), a lack of respect (2), defensiveness (3) and stonewalling (4
What are the different resources for constructive criticism?
Attachment style, Commitment, Idealization of partner, Beliefs about relationships; The belief that relationships are the result of hard work can help relationships last longer.
How does a persons unhappiness predict the happiness of the other partner?
The more depressed, lonely and unhappy one partner felt after the break-up, the less the other partner did.
What function may attributing the break up to the other person?
Attributing the break up to the other person may protect the self.
What can help people adjust better in a divorce?
People who attribute the cause of a divorce to the relationship rather than to themselves tend to adjust better
What is considered the most stressful major life event?
Death of a spouse
Where does loneliness arise from
unmet needs for affection and self affirmation
How can lonely individuals negatively spiral?
individuals become increasingly focused on social threats and the possibility of rejection until they hold negative social expectations for themselves and begin to behave in ways that confirm their negative views of themselves.
What is meant by homophily?
The tendency for similar people to be attracted to each other
What is an important indicator of marital status regarding similarity
Score on conscientiousness
What kind of relationship exists between similarity and liking?
Positive and liner
did research find a gender difference in the want for similarity?
Slightly more for women according to research
Name three ways this myth may have arose
Hollywood, “completing” ourselves, a few interesting differences between partners can actually spice up a relationship
Name some benefits of social support
It’s a buffer against stress
• It’s related to healthy behaviour
• It helps in finding solutions to your problems
50% increased likelihood of survival for participants with stronger social relationships
How does hunger effect perception of beauty
Hungry men prefer bigger women
What teds to be the preference of men with more traditional view of gender roles?
Stronger preference hourglass/v-shape among men with a more traditional view of gender roles
Name three factors of similarity that can determine successful matching
speech patterns, match in attractiveness and their face “merging” with another
Name the three factors in the causal triangle of attractiveness
Liking, similarity and interaction
What factors does online dating add?
Anonymity/ invisibility; More self-awareness in interaction, Less “informative” interaction, More extreme positive and negative behaviour towards interaction partner, More (superficial) self-disclosure
(a)synchronicity; More control over self-presentation, More idealisation conversational partner
Availability; Availability of potential partners, Availability of information about potential partners, Data & Matching Algorithms
Why does physical contact remain important?
More spontaneous affective response that occurs with direct contact does not always correspond to explicitly formulated preferences
What is the negative impacts of having a large pool of possible partners
Paradox of choice/ choice stress, Evaluating many dating profiles stimulates a mindset that hinders a smooth interaction in a (always uncomfortable) first social interaction.
What two mindsets stem from evaluating many dating profiles?
In a deliberation mindset (or assessment mindset) we are more concerned with evaluating different options
In an implementation mindset we are more concerned with the effective and enjoyable pursuit of important goals.
Can the success of a relationship be determined by algorithms?
No
What is meant by the social exchange theory?
Maximizing rewards of relationship
• Minimizing cost of relationship
• Comparison with ideal relationship & other possibilities
Why may people stay in an abusive relationship according to the Rusbult commitment investment model?
Investment to the relationships and quality of alternatives contribute to the commitment to a relationship
What does the reinforcement effect model suggest
We associate a person with contextual factors ( bad in a hot room)
Is self disclosure more important in individualistic of collectivist cultures?
Individualistic
What is meant by compannionate love?
Friendship based love, Based on affection, trust and a deep sense of friendship
What determines compannionate love?
Equality, proximity, Reciprocal self-disclosure
Could lead to romantic love
What structures in the brain are related to romantic love?
reward structures in the brain; Activation of ventral areas that are also activated during the experience of (dopamine controlled) kicks, such as cocaine, gambling, drinking
What cultural differences are there towards passion?
Passion is seen as much less important in non- western countries (China, India), and many Chinese words for love carry negative connotations.
How does positive bias contribute to a relationship?
Dissatisfied partners will attribute negative behaviour partner to person, positive outcomes to external circumstances
