Creating Belonging Flashcards
What are 2 necessary comments of flourishing relationships?
Attachment and love
What must love and attachment be accompanied by?
Purpose positive relationship behaviours
Who identified infant attachment?
John Bowlby
What are 2 parental behaviours identified by Bowlby?
- Maladaptive: chaotic, unplanned attempts to meed a child needs
- Adaptive: responsive to a childs behavioural cues
What is the primary function of infant attachment?
Protection and emotional security
What id insecure attachment a precursor of?
Numerous developmental struggles
What are the 2 infant attachment types?
- Secure
- Insecure-avoidant
- Insecure-resistant/ambivalent
What is secure attachment?
Characterised by a balance between exploration of the environment and contact with the caregiver
What is incsecure-avoidant attachment?
They avoid the caregiver when they are reintroduced
What is incsecure-resistant attachement?
Child demonstrates hostility towards caregiver whilst wanting to be held at the same time
What are the 3 romantic relationship types of attachment found by Hazan and Shaver?
- Secure
- Avoidant
- Anxious
What are the 2 types of adult avoidance in attachment?
- Dismissive and fearful
What is the adult secure attachment type?
- Easy to be emotionally close to other
- Can depend on others & vice versa
- Don’t worry about being alone
What is the adult dismissing attachment type?
- Comfortable without close emotional relationships
- Important to deel independent and self sufficient
- Prefer to not depend on others
What is the adult preoccupied type of attachment?
- Completely emotionally intimate with others
- Often find other are reluctant to get as close
- Worry sometimes worry that others don’t value me as much as I value them
What is the adult preoccupied type of attachment?
- Completely emotionally intimate with others
- Often find other are reluctant to get as close
- Worry sometimes worry that others don’t value me as much as I value them
What is the adult fearful type of attachment?
- Uncomfortable getting close to others
- Want emotionally close relationships
- Find it difficult to trust
- Worry I will be hurt if I get too close to others
What does a nurturing relationship between a child and a caregiver do?
promotes regulatory activity in the HPA
What is realised during touch and social contact?
Oxytocin
When does oxytocin increase?
Pregnancy and childbirth
Does being married make you happier?
No - score stayed at 7.28 before and after marriage, went up a little on wedding day
What are the 4 traditions that define love?
- Eros
- Philia
- Nomos
- Agape
What is eros?
Search for the beautiful
What is philia?
The affection in friendship
What is nomos
Submission and obedience to the divine
What is agape?
Bestowal of love by the divine
What is agape?
Bestowal of love by the divine
What is passionate love?
Intense arousal that fuels a romantic union
What is the compassionate form of love?
The soothing steady warm that sustains a relationship
What is the strongest predictor of marital satisfaction
Passionate love
What is it said is loves 3 components?
- Passion or the physical attractiveness and romantic drives
- Intimacy or feelings of closeness and connectedness
- Commitment involving the decision to initiate and sustain a relationship
What is the ratio of negative to positive interaction to sustain a healthy relationship?
5:1
What are the 7 principles of making a marriage work?
- Seek help early
- Edit yourself
- Soften your start up
4.
What are the 7 principles of making a marriage work?
- Seek help early
- Edit yourself
- Soften your start up
- Accept influence from partner
- Have high standards
- Learn t repair and exit argument
- Focus on the bright side
What is an active-constuctive partner?
That great sure you’ll get more
Whats a passive constructive partner?
Thats nice dear
Whats an active-destructive partner?
Are they going to expect more from you?
What a passive-destructive partner?
It rained all day here
