Attaching and detaching Flashcards
Basic premises of attachment and detachment
- Humans are pirmarily object seeking
- The human context is one of relatedness
- “To be” is to mean something to someone else
- A human being is a message that becomes alive when understood
Define attachment:
Attachment is connecting with someone in an emotionally significant manner
-A relatively enduring emotional bond with another person that forms in response to exposure, interaction, and familiarity
Define Detachment
Disconnecting from another - normal part of attachment/detachment
- enables us to distance ourselves from threats, increase autonomy,
- may involve a sense of loss
Problems with too much attachment
Loss of autonomy
Loss of identity
Inability to move on
Dependency
Problems with too little attachment
Loss of connection
Loneliness
isolation
loss of meaning
What are the three key things for attachment?
Exposure
Interaction
Familiarity
Characteristics of attachment
person specific
persistent
Emotionally significant
Behaviors indicative of attachment and how they are activated
Proximity seeking
Separation protest
These are activated by internal distress or external threat
Determinants of attachment hierarchy
- Quantity of time spent and repetition
- Quality of care
- Emotional investment of adult in child
- Responsiveness of adult
Core functions of attachment
- Protection/survival
- Provide safe haven
- secure base - Regulation of physiological arousal and emotional distress
- Sense of self
- Mentalizing.
Safe haven
A place that provides protection, comfort.
- hurts healed
- be totally known
- sanctuary from problems
Secure Base
promotes exploration, refueling, support.
-Secure attachment
Regulation
Help keep a child’s emotions within manageable bounds
-fosters development of child’s self regulation
Mirroring
The process of understanding how we are being experienced by another person, in a way that is affirming to us.
Mentalizing
The process of making sense of one’s own mind and the mind’s of others.