The Art of Listening

Question 1

What is one of the toughest challenges in being helpers?

Answer 1

Listening

Question 2

List the four steps involved in the listening process

Answer 2

1) Hearing and remembering verbal and non-verbal messages
2) Selecting and sorting information, ideas and feelings
3) Understanding meaning and emotions
4) Responding

Question 3

List three qualities of effective listeners

Answer 3

1) Set aside own judgements, pre-occupations and values to avoid interfering with the process of listening
2) Are not passive
3) Are busy with the task of trying to comprehend

Question 4

What are the twelve roadblocks of listening (3A-2D-2P-WM-R-JS)

Answer 4

• Advising
• Agreeing
• Analyzing
• Distracting
• Directing
• Persuading
• Probing
• Warning
• Moralizing
• Re-assuring
• Judging
• Shaming

Question 5

What is directing

Answer 5

Telling someone with a force of authority behind ti what to day, as if giving an order or a command. Authority can be actual or implied

Question 6

What is warning?

Answer 6

Involved pointing out the risk or dangers or consequence of what a person is doing. This can also be a treat or a prediction of a bad outcome

Question 7

What is advising?

Answer 7

Includes making suggestions and providing solutions, usually with the intention of being helpful. The counselor uses expertise and experience to recommend a course of action.

Question 8

What is persuading?

Answer 8

Can be lecturing, arguing, giving reasons or trying to convince with logic. The counselor believe that the client has not adequately reasoned through the problem and need help doing so.

Question 9

What is moralizing?

Answer 9

Is preaching and telling people what they should do

Question 10

What is judging?

Answer 10

Can take the form of blaming, criticizing, or imply disagreeing. Implies that something this wrong with the person or with something that has been said

Question 11

What is agreeing?

Answer 11

Usually sounds like taking sides with the person, perhaps through approving or praising. This message gives sanction or approval to what i being said. This stope communication process and may imply an uneven relationship between the speaker and listener

Question 12

What is shaming?

Answer 12

Can include attaching a name or a stereotype to what the person is saying or doing

Question 13

What is analyzing?

Answer 13

Offers interpretation or explanation of what the person is saying or doing. This is a very common and tempting activity for counselors: to seek out the real problem or hidden meaning and give an interpretation

Question 14

What is probing?

Answer 14

Asks question to gather facts, or press for more information to find out more

Question 15

What is reassuring?

Answer 15

Can sound like sympathizing or consoling. The intent is to make the person feel better.

Question 16

What is distracting?

Answer 16

Tries to draw people away from what they are experiencing by humouring, changing the subject or withdrawing.

Question 17

What are the problems with roadblocks responses?

Answer 17

• These responses might not actually be wrong

- There are times and places where each of these might be appropriate

Question 18

Roadblocks tend to what?

Answer 18

Tend to divert people from their natural flow of experience

Question 19

List 4 non-verbals that could indicate a good listener?

Answer 19

• Show variations in facial expression that in part mirror what the speaker is saying
• Posture communicated interest and attention
• Vocal sound such as “Ah, huh, Hmm. I hear you”

Question 20

Why should questions be avoided during listening?

Answer 20

Asking questions is NOT the same as listening, and can actually in fact become a roadblock because you are directing the persons attention towards a topic of particular interest, rather than just listening

Question 21

What is a simple guide regarding questions?

Answer 21

DON’T ask more than three questions in a row, and both closed and open ended question have a place.
–> After asking a question, then resume the listening role