Sweeney Todd: Ms. Lovett Flashcards
Start of “WORST PIES IN LONDON”
A customer!
“TIMES IS HARD. TIMES IS HARD”
Spit it out, dear. Go on. On the floor. There’s worse things than that down there. That’s my boy.
TODD: Isn’t that a room up there over the shop? If times are so hard, why don’t you rent it out? That should bring in something.
Up there? Oh, no one will go near it. People think it’s haunted.. You see–years ago, something happened up there. Something not very nice.
“AH, BUT THERE WAS WORSE YET TO COME–POOR THING”
Johanna, that was the baby’s name… Pretty little Johanna…
TODD: Go on.
My, you do like a good story, don’t you?
TODD: Would no one have mercy on her?
So it is you–Benjamin Barker.
TODD: Not Barker! Not Barker! Todd now! Sweeney Todd! Where is she?
So changed! Good god, what did they do to you down in bloody Australia or wherever?
TODD: Where is my wife? Where’s Lucy?
She poisoned herself. Arsenic from the apothecary on the corner. I tried to stop her but she wouldn’t listen to me.
TODD: And my daughter?
Johanna? He’s got her.
TODD: He? Judge Turpin?
Even he had a conscience tucked away, I suppose. Adopted her like his own. You could say it was good luck for her almost.
TODD: Fifteen years sweating in a living hell on a trumped up charge. Fifteen years dreaming that, perhaps, I might come home to a loving wife and child. Let them quake in their boots–Judge Turpin and the Beadle for their hour has come.
You’re going to–get ‘em? You? A bleeding little nobody of a runaway convict? Don’t make me laugh. You’ll never get His ‘Igh and Mightiness! Nor the Beadle neither. Not in a million years. You got any money? Listen to me! You got any money?
TODD: No money.
Then how are you going to live even?
TODD: I’ll live. If I have to sweat in the sewers or in the plague hospital, I’ll live–and I’ll have.
Oh you poor thing! You poor thing! Wait! See! It don’t have to be the sewers or the plague hospital. When they come for the little girl, I hid ‘em. I thought, who knows? Maybe the poor silly blighter’ll be back again someday and need ‘em. Cracked in the head, wasn’t I? Times as bad as they are, I could have got five, maybe ten quid for ‘em, any day. See? You can be a barber again.
Start of MY FRIENDS
My, them handles is chased silver, ain’t they?
TODD: That’s him? Over there?
Yes dear. He’s always here Thursdays.
TODD: Haircutter, barber, toothpuller to His Royal Majesty the King of Naples.
Eyetalian. All the rage, he is.
TODD: Not for long.
Oh Mr. T, you really think you can do it?
TODD: By tomorrow they’ll all be flocking after me like sheep to a storm.
Oh no! Look. The Beadle–Beadle Bamford.
TODD: So much better.
But what if he recognizes you? Hadn’t we better–?
TODD: I will do what I have set out to do, woman.
Oops. Sorry dear, I’m sure.
TODD: I do. I am Sweeney Todd and I have opened a bottle of Pirelli’s Elixir, and I have to say to you it is nothing but an arrant fraud, concocted from piss and ink.
He’s right. Phew! Better to throw your money down the sewer.
TODD: And furthermore I have serviced no kings, yet I wager that I can shave a cheek with ten times more dexterity than any street mounteback! You see these razors?
The finest in England.
TODD: I lay them against five pounds you are no match for me. You hear me, sir. Either accept my challenge or reveal yourself a sham.
Bravo, bravo.
BEADLE: THE WINNER IS TODD.
Smooth as a baby’s bottom!
PIRELLI: Here, sir. And may the good Lord smile on you–until we meet again. Come, boy. Signori! Bellissime signorine! Buon giorno a tutti!
Who’d have thought it dear! You pulled it off!
MAN WITH CAP: Oh, sir, Mr. Todd, sir, do you have an establishment of your own?
He certainly does. Sweeney Todd’s Tonsorial Parlor–above my meat pieshop on Fleet Street.
BEADLE: Mr. Todd.. Strange, sir, but it seems your face is known to me.
Him? That’s a laugh–him being my uncle’s cousin and arrived from Birmingham yesterday.
BEADLE: Well, sir, I try my best for my neighbors. Fleet Street? Over your pieshop, ma’am?
That’s it, sir.
BEGGAR WOMEN: ALMS… ALMS… FOR A MISERABLE…
Alms… Alms… How many times have I told you? I’ll not have trash from the gutter hanging around my establishment!
BEGGAR WOMEN: Not just a penny dear? Or a pie? One of them pies that gives stomach cramps to half the neighborhood? Come on, dear. Have a heart, dear.
Off. Off with you or you’ll get a kick on the rump that’ll make your teeth chatter!
BEGGAR WOMEN: Stuck up thing! You and your fancy airs! ALMS… ALMS… FOR A DESPERATE WOMEN…
It’s not much of a chair, but it’ll do till you get your fancy new one. It was me poor Albert’s chair, it was. Sat in it all day long he did, after his leg give out from the dropsy. Kinda bare, isn’t it? I never did like a bare room. Oh, well, we’ll find some nice little knickknacks.
TODD: Why doesn’t the Beadle come? “Before the week is out,” that’s what he said.
And who says the week’s out yet? It’s only Tuesday.
TODD: And the Judge? When will I get him?
Can’t you think of nothing else? Always broodin’ away on yer wrongs what happened heaven knows how many years ago–
TODD: Yes.
Gillyflowers, I’d say. Nothing like a nice bowl of gillies.
ANTHONY: I congratulate you. And… er..
Mrs. Lovett, sir.
ANTHONY: A pleasure, ma’am. Oh, Mr. Todd…The surest sign that Johanna loves me.
Johanna?
ANTHONY: That’s her name…if I could lodge her here just for an hour or two!
Bring her, dear.
ANTHONY: I shall be grateful for this to the grave. Now I must hurry for surely the Judge is off to the Old Bailey. My thanks! A thousand blessings on you both!
Johanna! Who’d have thought it! It’s like Fate, isn’t it? You’ll have her back before the day is out.
TODD: For a few hours! Before he carries her off to the other end of England.
Oh, that sailor! Let him bring her here and then, since you’re so hot for a little… that’s the throat to slit, dear. Oh Mr. T. we’ll make a lovely home for her. You and me. The poor thing. All those years and not a scrap of motherly affection. I’ll soon change that, I will, for if ever there was a maternal heart, it’s mine.
PIRELLI: Good morning, Mr. Todd–and to you, Bellissima Signoria.
Well, ‘ow do you do, Signor, I’m sure.
PIRELLI: A little business with Mr. Todd, Signora. Perhaps if you will give the permission?
Oh yes, indeed, I’ll just pop on down to my pies. Oh lawks, look at it now! Don’t look like it’s had a kind word since half past never! What would you say, son, to a nice juicy meat pie, eh? Your teeth is strong, I hope?
TOBIAS: Oh yes, ma’am.
Then come with me, love.
TODD: Why?
That’s my boy. Tuck in.
TODD: Why do you call me that?
At least you’ve got a nice full head of hair on you.
TOBIAS: Oh gawd, he’s got an appointment with his tailor. If he’s late and it’s my fault–you don’t know him!
I wouldn’t want to, I’m sure, dear.
TOBIAS: Oo, sir! Gin, sir! Thanking you, sir, thanking you kindly. Gin! You’re a Christian indeed, sir! Oh ma’am, the gentleman says to give me a nice tot of gin, ma’am.
Gin, dear? Why not!
End of KISS ME.
Maybe you should run along, dear.
TOBIAS: Oh no, ma’am, I daren’t budge till he calls for me.
I’ll pop up and see what Mr. Todd says. Ah me, me poor knees is not what they was, dear. How long before the Eyetalian gets back?
TODD: He won’t be back.
Now, Mr.T, you didn’t! You’re crazy mad! Killing a man wot done you no harm? And the boy downstairs?
TODD: He recognized me from the old days. He tried to blackmail me, half my earnings forever.
Oh well, that’s a different matter! What a relief, dear! For a moment I thought you’d lost your marbles. Ooh! All that blood! Enough to make you come all over gooseflesh, ain’t it. Poor bugger. Oh, well! Three quid! Well, waste not, want not, as I always say. Now, dear, we got to use the old noggin.
BEADLE: Thank you, sir. Thank you.
Well, first there’s the lad.
TODD: Send him up here.
Him, too! Now surely one’s enough for today, dear. Shouldn’t indulge yourself, you know. Now let me see, he’s half seas over already with the gin…
TODD: Providence is kind!
Who is it?
TODD: Judge Turpin.
Him, him? The Judge? It can’t be! it–
TODD: Quick, leave me!
What are you going to do?
TODD: Leave me, I said!
Don’t worry dear, I’m–out! Excuse me, you Lordship.
TODD: At your service, sir. An honor to receive your patronage, sir.
Now, dear, seems like your guvnor has gone and left you high and dry. But don’t worry. Your aunt Nellie will think of what to do with you. Come on into my lovely back parlor.
TODD: Out. Out, I say!
All this running and shouting. What is it now, dear?
TODD: I had him–and then–
The sailor busted in. I saw them both running down the street and I said to myself: “The fat’s in the fire, for sure!”
TODD: I HAD HIM! HIS THROAT WAS BARE BENEATH MY HAND!–!
There, there, dear. Don’t fret.
End of EPIPHANY.
That’s all very well, but all that matters now is him. Listen! Do you hear me? Can you hear me? Get control of yourself? What are we going to do about him? And there’s the lad downstairs. We’d better go and have a look and be sure he’s still there. When I left him he was sound asleep in the parlor. Come on! No problem there. He’s still sleeping. He’s simple as a baby lamb. Later I can fob him off with some story easy. But him! What are we going to do with him?
