SCENE THREE

Question 1

(Scene three: donkey) Enter

Answer 1

Now this can’t be right, I’m all turned around. I took a right at the candy house, passed that weird old woman in the shoe and then took a left at Mary’s Little house of Lambchops

Question 2

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARDS: Ugh, it’s hideous

Answer 2

Aw that’s not very nice. It’s just a donkey

Question 3

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARDS
Step aside shrek, and let us at him

Answer 3

Why, what did he do?

Question 4

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARDS
He’s a talking donkey. A freak of nature. As are you, you unsavoury beast

Answer 4

Hey now, you’re going the right way for a smackdown

Question 5

CAPTAIN OF THE GUARDS
Bu the order of lord farquaad, I am authorised to place you both under arrest

Answer 5

Under arrest eh
PAUSE
Boo

Question 6

GUARDS
AHHHHHHH

Answer 6

(Whispers)
This is the part where you run away
(They leave)
And don’t come back! Now, which way to duloc

Question 7

DONKEY
Can I just say, that was incredible man, they were trippin all over themselves to get away from you. I like that

Answer 7

Oh good, I’m glad. Now, why don’t you go celebrate your victory with your friends

Question 8

DONKEY
But I don’t have any friends

Answer 8

Now there’s a shocker

Question 9

That’s funny, say, you lost or something?

Answer 9

No, I’m just trying to figure out the best route to duloc

Question 10

DONKET
oh duloc, I know duloc! You gotta let me show you the way, because I am like a GOS with fur

Answer 10

I’ll be fine on my own thanks

Question 11

DONKEY (very big paragraph… I did six years in solitary for impersonating a piñata)

Answer 11

Alright look, only because I’m lost, you can come-

Question 12

DONKEY
Yeah! WHOO-hoo alright

Answer 12

On one condition! You keep the jabbering to a minimum

Question 13

DONKEY
You got it! No jabbering! Man, you will not regret this.

Answer 13

Too late