Relationships (U4) Flashcards
Where does teen violence often happen?
Teen dating violence often takes place at the home of their partners
In an unhealthy relationship, one partner…
- Is isolated from friends, family and acitives
- Uses guilt to control partner
- Trying to embarrass partner especially in front of friends
- Tells them what clothes to wear and not wear, makeup, etc.
- Makes all the decisions
- Uses jealousy to justify actions
- Always wants to be together
- Doesn’t let partner talk or be seen with the opposite sex
Types of abuse?
Physical, emotional, sexual, economic, isolation, social status, verbal, harassment
Examples of physical abuse?
Pushing, shoving, hitting, kicking, biting, pulling hair, throwing, stomping, cutting, grabbing, punching, choking, using a weapon, not letting you sleep
Examples of emotional abuse?
Put downs, calling names- stupid, ugly, fat, crazy, etc., playing mind games, making you feel crazy, making you always feel wrong, humiliating you, not allowing any privacy
Examples of sexual abuse?
Rape, forced intimacy
Examples of economic abuse?
Controlling someone’s money without their consent, taking someones paycheck
Example of isolation abuse?
Using jealousy, preventing you from going out, getting a job, going to school, seeing your family and friends, intimidating family and friends so they won’t see you anymore
Example of social status abuse?
Using your background against you (sexism, homophobia, racism, anti-immigrant)
Example of verbal abuse?
Aggressive/demanding communication, non-affirming, name calling, silencing you
Examples of harassment abuse?
Nagging, threatening, being forceful/won’t let up, aggressive
What are the three stages of the cycle of abuse and violence?
- Tension building
- Explosion
- Honeymoon
What can an abuser do in stage one of violence?
- Pick fights
- Act jealous and possessive
- Criticize, threaten
- Drink, use drugs
- Be moody, unpredictable
What can a victim do in stage one of violence?
- Feel like he/she is walking on egg shells
- Try to reason with the batterer
- Try to calm the abuser
- Try to appease the batterer
- Feeling afraid or anxious
What can an abuser do in stage two of violence?
- Verbal abuse
- Sexual assault
- Physical abuse
- Increase control over money
- Restrain partner
- Destroy property, phone
- Emotionally Assault
What can a victim do in stage two of violence?
- Experience fear, shock
- Use self-defense
- Call for help
- Try to flee, leave
- Pray for it to stop
What can an abuser do in stage three of violence?
- Ask for forgiveness
- Promise it wont happen again
- Stop drinking, using drugs
- Go to counseling
- Be affectionate
- Minimize or deny abuse
What can a victim do in stage three of violence?
- Forgive
- Return home
- Arrange for counseling
- Feel hopeful
- Feel manipulated
- Blame self
- Minimize or deny abuse
Ingredients for a healthy realtionship?
Mutual respect
Trust
Honesty
Support
Fairness/Equality
Separate identities
Good communication
What do both partners have in a healthy relationship, in terms of communication?
- Can share their feelings and needs
- Are equally committed to the relationship
- Can share person with other without feeling jealous
- Are willing to compromise
- Do not lose sight of who they are
- Share a basic value system
- Have common goals and a sense of direction
What do both partners have in a healthy relationship, in terms of respect?
- Can share their sexual history
- Respecting each others sexual boundaries
- Are able to say no to sex
What to do if a friend needs help (four)
Approach your friend and say, “I’m worried about you because …”
Listen and believe what your friend tells you. Don’t judge or blame. Say, “this is not your fault.”
Show concern.
Offer support. “What can I do to help?”
