Love Actually - Parent-Infant Love and Love in Childhood (Week 6) Flashcards
Harry Harlow Monkey Experiment
-Two mothers, one clothed without milk and one hard wired with milk
-The child preferred the clothed mother over the wired one
-Went against the original hypothesis
Serve and Return Response
-Baby makes a noise expecting parent to respond
-The baby puts something out to the environment and the environment returns something back
-This back-and-forth interaction is critical to brain development in infancy
Still face experiment
-Baby cries when mother has a blank face since she’s not giving a response
-When a baby is not being attended to it is biologically stressful for the baby
-The baby’s brain is full of stress hormones
Occasional inattention
-It is okay to not pay attention to children all the time
-Can be beneficial as the baby can learn independence and self-smoothing
John Bowlby
-Belief in his time was that if kids were given too much attention they would be spoiled
-Was a traumatic experience for him
-Developed the attachment theory
-Concluded that infants and young children should experience a warm, intimate and continuous relationship with a mother or permanent mother substitute in which both find satisfaction and enjoyment
Anna Frued
Had a foster center during WW2 to house children and encouraged parents to keep contact
Rene Spitz
-Studied children in institutions
-Coined anaclitic depression and hospitalism
Anaclitic Depression
-The loss of a loved object
-Depression associated with separation from caregiver
-Child will make recovery if there’s a reunion in 3-5 months
Hospitalism
-If a child is deprived for longer than five months they become depressed
-Theoretically irreversible
John Bowlby Career
-Focused on intergenerational influences on attachment
-Theorized that attachment was evolutionary to protect infants
-Published Maternal Care and Mental Health to document the mental health of homeless children in post-war Europe
Impact of Bowlby’s Works
-Significant changes in foster and hospital institutions
-Controversial because it clashed with psychoanalytic theories which saw an infant’s internal life as fantasy instead of reality
-Used for political agenda to keep women from the workforce
Imprinting
-Konrad Lorenz
-Phenomenon where animals become attached to the first thing that they see
-Observed in young geese who imprinted on him
Mary Ainsworth
-Student of Bowlby
-Developed a standardized procedure to test infant attachment
-The strange situation procedure
-The procedure puts an infant in a controlled stressful situation
-Not used clinically or for diagnostic purposes only used in research
Strange Situation Procedure
-Mother and child enters a room
-A stranger enters
-Mother leaves and child starts crying
-Stranger tries to comfort child, no success
-The mother comes back
-The baby is only comforted when they’re reunited with their mother
Secure Attachment
-A parental style that is in tune with the child
-Child grows to be empathetic, have good boundaries and meaningful relationships
Avoidant Attachment
-Results from unavailable or rejecting parents
-Child grow up to be more distant, critical, and rigid
Ambivalent Attachment
-Results from inconsistent parenting styles
-Child grow up to be controlling or unpredictable in relationships
Disorganized or Reactive Attachment
-Traumatic parenting experiences
-Child grows to be abusive, untrusting and unable to build positive relationships
Attachment Theory Summary
-Infants need to develop a relationship with at least one primary, consistent caregiver–does not have to be biological–so that they can develop
-In the presence of a responsive caregiver, the baby feels safe to explore and play
-There are no perfect parent
-A sensitive caregiver is one that managed and repaired distractions so that they come back to the infant’s serve and return needs
-Early patterns of attachment can shape an individual’s expectations and behavior later in life
Communication
-Kissing, eye contact, checking in
-We see communication in early infancy
-Babies communicate through imitation
Attunement
-How reactive a person is to another’s emotional needs and mood
-Well attuned individuals will respond with appropriate language and behavior based on another person’s emotional state
-Parents should be attuned to what the baby is paying attention to
Between parent and child
-Haim Ginott
-Never deny a child’s feelings
-Focus on the behavior, not on the child (don’t blame the child they may internalize that they are a bad person)
-Attach rules to things; tell them what to do
-Allow independence for children and give choices within safe limits
-Limit criticism to a specific event avoid “never” or “always”
-Refrain from using words that you don’t want the kid to repeat
Erich Fromm’s The Art of Loving
-Babies are born into a state of narcissism because they only care about other people if they can provide something for them
-The ability to love others develop as they begin to be more independent
-Love develops from the concept of giving gifts
-Giving becomes more enjoyable than receiving
-“I am loved because I love” & “I need you because I love you” vs. “I love because I am loved” & “I love you because I need you”
-Mature unconditional love vs. immature conditional love
Fatherly love
-Is conditional unlike motherly love
-The negative is that it has to be earned; usually though obedience
-Disobedience is seem as punishable; withdrawal of fatherly love
-The positive is that you have control over your father’s love unlike your mother’s
