CHAPTER TEN: ATTRACTION & INTIMACY Flashcards
1
Q
the need to belong
A
- a motivation to belong with others in relationships that provide ongoing positive interactions (pain killer)
- the pain of rejection: physical pain
2
Q
what leads to friendship/attraction?
A
- proximity
- physical attractiveness
- liking those who like us
- rewards
3
Q
proximity/familiarity
A
- interaction = similarities, social unit
- anticipation of interaction
- mere exposure effect: tendency for novel stimuli to be liked after repeated exposure (things become familiar = liking)
4
Q
physical attractiveness
A
- men focus on it more
- halo effect: when we find someone attractive, we give them other positive attributes
- the matching phenomenon
- ## the physical attractiveness stereotype
5
Q
the matching phenomenon
A
- tendency for men and women to choose partners who are a “good match” to their attractiveness and other traits
6
Q
the physical attractiveness stereotype
A
- presumption that physically attractive people possess other socially desirable traits as well
- first impressions
- attractive people are treated better in society
7
Q
who is attractive?
A
- evolutionary standpoint: men were attracted based on offspring availability (women with youthful, wide hips); females seeked for a provider (big + strong)
- social comparison
- who we love: we downplay the physical flaws to stay in a “mating” position
8
Q
similarity vs. complementarity
A
- likeness brings liking
- dissimilarity breeds dislike
- complementarity: popular tendency in a relationship for each to complete what is missing in the other
9
Q
liking those who like us
A
- attribution: fake likeability can only work if the target attributes it to your personality
- self-esteem and attraction: low SE (the sweater is nice); high SE (the sweater is nice on me)
- honesty is a highly valuable trait
10
Q
relationship rewards
A
- reward theory of attraction
- social exchange theory
- liking by association: associating attraction based on how rewarding we feel with someone
- influences on attraction: proximity, associating with attractive people, sharing our views (rewarding), mutual
11
Q
reward theory of attraction
A
we like those whose behaviour is rewarding to us or who we associate rewarding events with
12
Q
passionate love
A
- a state of intense longing for union with another
- two-factor theory of emotion: intense arousal = love
13
Q
companionate love
A
- the affection we feel for those with whom our lives are deeply intertwined
14
Q
secure attachment
A
attachments rooted in trust and marked by intimacy
15
Q
avoidance attachment
A
attachments marked by discomfort over, or resistance to, being close to others
