Ch. 9 Flashcards
changes in adolescent romance
1970s: characterized by ‘dating’
-former rules followed (set time and date, parental permission, being home by curfew)
now: less structured
-‘seeing someone’ or ‘hanging out’ has replaced ‘dating’
-know e/o as friends and spend unstructured social time w/ e/o before becoming romantically involved
-adolescents can be found in mixed-gender groups > alone on a date
reasons teens give for having relationships
recreation
-learning
-status
-companionship
-intimacy
-courtship
age and gender differences
younger adolescents motivated by recreation, intimacy and status
-older adolescents motivated by intimacy and recreation, but not status
-girls list interpersonal qualities as what they’re looking for at all ages
-boys initially list phys. qualities and progress to being motivated by interpersonal qualities in later adolescence
-by late high school, boys and girls are interested in: support, intimacy, communication, commitment and passion
-boys are more likely to be proactive (initiating contact), while girls are more likely to be reactive, but more assertive in initiating than they used to
benefits of romantic relationships vs. friendships
involve more intense emotion, including pos. (love, joy) and neg. (anxiety, sadness)
-more likely to involve sexual activity and being cared for by companion
drawbacks of romantic relationships vs. friendships
restricting social freedom, emotional vulnerability, and more conflict
Sternberg’s 3 features of love relationships
1) passion
2) intimacy
3) commitment
passion
phys. attraction and sexual desire, as well as intense jealousy, anxiety, anger and delight
intimacy
feelings of closeness and attachment, including understanding, support and exclusive communication
commitment
pledge to love someone over long haul, through ups and downs, persisting through fluctuations in passion
Sternberg’s 7 love forms
1) liking
2) infatuation
3) empty love
4) romantic love
5) companionate love
6) fatuous love
7) consumate love
liking
intimacy alone, most similar to friendship
infatuation
passion alone, physiological and emotional engagement
empty love
commitment alone, together but disengaged
romantic love
passion and intimacy, “in love” but fleeting
companionate love
intimacy and commitment, family but lacking passion
fatuous love
passion and commitment, ‘silly’ whirlwind romance
consummate love
passion, intimacy and commitment; the ideal
applying Sternberg to adolescents
commitment is missing or tentative until emerging adulthood
-infatuation or romantic love are the love forms that apply to adolescents
-passion and intimacy can be high
–communicating, support and sharing are important
-due to rising marriage age, some adolescents achieve consummate love and remain together throughout lives
falling in love
adolescents are more likely to fall in love with those similar to them in intelligence, social status, ethnicity, spirituality, personality, and phys. characteristics
consensual validation
find others who are similar and give support and strength to own characteristics
-gives sources of agreement and functions to limit conflicts
4 phases of adolescent love
1) initiation
2) status
3) affection
4) bonding
initiation
superficial, brief, but exciting explorations of romance
status
gaining confidence, aware of social status disparities and motivated by how friends will perceive match
affection
deeper feelings and expression, increasing likelihood of sexual involvement
-longer commitments and decreasing friend involvement
bonding
enduring connections forming, discussion of possible life-long commitment
-usually doesn’t happen until emerging adulthood
same-sex romance
some Western parents still react w/ anger or rejection when same-sex sexual identity is disclosed
-substance abuse, depression, suicide, school difficulties and running away are risks for being rejected following disclosure, by society or family
post break-up
young men who are broken up with take it harder than women
–become more lonely, depressed, and less willing to be friends after
–social media surveillance increases issues
-increased substance abuse is common, leading to unwanted pursuit or conflicts w/ ex-partner
romantic harassment
persistent use of phys. or psychological abuse in attempt to continue dating someone after they’ve indicated a desire to end a relationship
-when confronted, men were unlikely to acknowledged harassment
–insisted they were trying to break through resistance to reinitiate the relationship
cohabitation
living together before marriage has become more common in West
–2/3 of people engage in cohabitation
-young people choose to live together to ensure good lifestyle and reduce potential to divorce
-cohabitation related to higher divorce rates
–cohabitating couples live separate lives, esp. financially, so they’re not ready for adjusting to marriage status
–less religious, more accepting of divorce, and more skeptical of marriage
–inertia of cohabitation may funnel couples into marriage when they may might’ve not gone there
marriage partners
-90% of people marry
-mutual attraction or love ranked highest for important quality in marriage partner
–next were dependable character, emotional maturity and pleasing disposition
-chastity rated highly in Eastern and Middle-Eastern cultures, but not in Western cultures
arranged vs. romantic marriages
arranged: commitment is primary and intimacy is welcomed but not demanded
romantic: spouse as soul mate, first and foremost
-intimacy necessary and primary
adolescent sexual activity
puberty and sexual maturation are central adolescent changes
-bring changes in relationships, identity, feelings, beliefs and behaviors
-research focused on intercourse due to focus on preventing pregnancy and STDs
–most sexual activity is spectrum from touching own bodies, kissing, touching bodies of others -> sex
-research is self-report and susceptible to bias
intercourse timing
most (77%) of adolescent sexual activity takes place in romantic relationship
-60%+ of sexually active adolescence reported ‘hooking up’ w/ uncommitted partner (friend exploring possibility of sexual connection)
-average length of sexual relationship is 6 mths.
pornography
interest in sexuality and sexual topics high in adolescence
-sexual exp. limited by parents, cultural expectations, or social opportunity
-by age 17, 20% Amer. males and 5% of females viewed pornography
–by the end of emerging adulthood, 87% males and 31% females viewed pornography
-majority of adolescents and emerging adults felt watching pornography was okay
–expressed concerns about it’s unrealistic nature and degrading ways women are portrayed in it and the way it separates sex from intimacy
cultural acceptance of premarital sex
restrictive cultures prohibit premarital sexual behavior by separation of males and females
-female premarital sexual activity to marriage is important, and violations are punishable in some cultures
-U.S. is semi-restrictive, with 55% of adults accepting premarital sex, but 45% disapprove
–parents tolerate sexual behavior even when they don’t encourage it
gender differences in interpreting sex
double standard in view on adolescent sexuality means that girls and boys are taught different ‘sexual scripts’
-frameworks for understanding how a sexual exp. is supposed to proceed and how to interpret it
-can be found from first sexual experience
–boys: excited, satisfied, happy, and tell friends w/ pride
–girls: ambivalent w/ fear and guilt mixed w/ happiness, less likely to tell friends
sexually active adolescents similarities
self esteem and life satisfaction
sexually active adolescents differences
later phys. maturation and higher academic aspirations in non-active students
-non-active students may be more religious and conservative
-adolescents who have first sexual experience under 15 are more likely to be users of drugs and alcohol, exp. poverty, and lack supervision
emerging adulthood sexuality
sexual experience is normalized as an emerging adult
-emerging adults who abstain from sexual activity do so from:
–fears (pregnancy, STDs), religious or moral beliefs about premarital sex
–feeling of not having met ‘right person’
-sex most often takes place in context of relationship
–emerging adults are more likely to have sexual contact w/ casual, non-commitment partners
-1/2 of men and 1/3 of women agreed it was okay to have sex w/o enduring emotional connection
–majority noted benefits and importance of incorporating emotional intimacy and sex
sexual harassment
jokes, name-calling, leering, unwanted phys. contact
-common and pervasive in adolescence
–starting by 5th grade, targets early developing and LGBT youth the most
-result in anxiety and depression and school trouble
-experienced by half of all girls by the time they’re in 9th grade
coercion
unwanted sexual contact due to social pressure, alcohol, or psych./phys. force
-most coercion occurs when adolescents are sober
-power and control issues cause coercion, and communication differences
effective sex edu.
aims to reduce teen pregnancy, STDs, and other side effects before adolescents are emotionally mature enough to process experience
8 features of effective sex edu.
1) narrow focus
2) based on theoretically endorsed program like CBT
3) clear and frequently reinforced message
4) give basic and accurate info about reducing risks
5) include activities that teach skills for dealing w/ social pressures
6) model and practice in negotiation and refusal skills
7) vary teaching methods and personalize info to engage students
8) incorporate behavior goals, teaching methods, and materials specific to age, culture, and exp.
