3 - Observing without evaluating Flashcards
If you want to motivate someone, what’s a statement with an observation, feeling, and need that is better than calling someone irresponsible for not completing their chores?
I feel disappointed you didn’t finish unloading the dishwasher last night because you said you would and consistency is important to me
We need to separate the observation from what?
The separation of observation from evaluation.
It’s difficult to make _____________s that are free from judgement, criticism, or other forms of analysis.
Observations
Which is a proper observation according to NVC?
“The principal talks too much.”
“He has a big mouth.”
“In meetings, he tells long stories, often 15 minutes long, that prevent others from being able to express themselves.”
C
Are these statements correct observations?
“You are always busy”
“She is never there when she’s needed.”
No, they are exaggerations
Which is an evaluation and which is an observation:
“He frequently comes over.”
“He comes over at least three times a week.”
A - evaluation
B - Observation
Which is an evaluation and which is an observation:
“The last three times I initiated an activity, you said you didn’t want to do it.”
“You seldom do what I want.”
A - observation
B - evaluation
Why is it bad to combine observation and evaluation when communicating?
Others hear criticism and resist what we are saying.
What’s a better way of saying, “Hank Smith is a poor soccer player”?
Hank Smith has not scored a goal in twenty games.
