Week 9: Sexuality Flashcards
What are the prevalent attitudes toward casual sex?
Most believe that sex among unmarried people is acceptable as long as it occurs in an affectionate committed r/s
How much do people approve of: a) premarital sex, b) same sex, and 3) extramarital sex?
Premarital and same sex: More people approve today than in the past
Extramarital sex: Ppl do not approve much across time
How do sexual attitudes differ across gender?
Men are more permissive than women
Men are more accepting of casual, uncommitted sex
– i.e. men have less restricted sociosexuality
What is a sexual double standard?
Judges permissive women more harshly than permissive men
What are the two key points regarding sexual behaviours?
1) Enormous variability in behaviour from person to person
2) Sexual behaviour that is common is not necessarily more desirable or appropriate than less typical behaviour
How do sexual behaviours differ from couples and singles?
Spouses and cohabiting partners have sex more often than singles do
What is the sex recession?
Around 2000, Americans have been having sex less frequently
How do men and women differ on feelings of sexual jealousy?
Men: More distressed by sexual infidelity
Women: More distressed by emotional infidelity
What are the explanations for differences in men and women’s sexual jealousy?
1) Evolutionary explanation: Paternity uncertainty
2) Cultural explanation: Social gender theory
What is the evolutionary explanation for differences in men and women’s sexual jealousy?
In contrast to women men can never be completely sure they are the genetic father of their children (i.e. paternity uncertainty)
What is the cultural explanation for differences in men and women’s sexual jealousy?
Social gender theory: When people think about hypothetical mate infidelities, men and women base their judgments on STEREOTYPES ABOUT GENDER DIFFERENCES
How does the evolutionary explanation and the cultural explanation for differences in men and women’s sexual jealousy complement each other?
Sex diffs in mating strategies –> Stereotypes form based on behaviour –> Stereotypes trigger sexual jealousy differently for men and women
How often do husbands and wives have extradyadic sex?
1/5 wives and 1/3 husbands
– Men are more likely to have extramarital affairs than women
Why are husbands more likely to have extradyadic sex than wives?
Men are more likely to have extramarital affairs than women
– Because men are more permissive towards casual sex
What is consensual nonmonogamy (CNM)?
A relational arrangement in which partners agree that it’s acceptable to have more than one sexual and/or romantic partnership at the same time
What are the 3 types of CNM?
- Open r/s
- Swinging
- Polyamory
What is an open relationship?
Partners pursue independent sexual r/s outside of their primary dyad
What is swinging?
Partners engage in extradyadic sex, usually at social events where both of them are in attendance
What is polyamory?
Partners have consensual loving and romantic r/s with more than one partner
How do monogamous r/s and CNM r/s differ on r/s outcomes?
- Both are relatively equal on satisfaction, commitment and passion
- Mono couples and CNM couples do not differ on jealousy
How do people communicate desire?
People often never tell their partners that they’re interested in sex - they signal their desire and consent through INDIRECT, NONVERBAL MEANS
How does sexual communication relate to satisfaction?
Partners who talk candidly about sex have more fulfilling sexual interactions with each other than those who do not
How does sexual communication and satisfaction differ by sexual orientation?
Gays and lesbians routinely enjoy better sex than heterosexual couples do
What are some prevailing patterns in sexual coercion?
- Men are more likely to engage in sexually aggressive behaviour than women
- Women are more often victims than perpetrators
- Perpetrators underestimate the force they use and the harm they do
How does complication arise in the context of sexual coercion?
- Some women offer token resistance to sex by initially saying “no” when they really mean “yes”
- Sometimes, men get rewarded if they ignore a partner’s apparent reluctance and persist in their pursuit of sex
What is the culture surrounding sex and sexual communication?
As long as we support a culture that:
- regards male sexual activity as a form of conquest
- encourages women to ‘play’ hard-to-get
- trains us to be embarrassed by honest talk with a sexual partner
How does culture affect sexual communication and responsibility?
As long as we support the culture, it will be difficult to disentangle power and violence from issues of sexual communication and responsibility
What are the characteristics of consent?
Consent is clear, coherent, willing and ongoing
How does sex relate to r/s satisfaction?
Couples who are happy with their sex lives tend to be happy with their r/s as well
What is the feedback loop involving sex and r/s satisfaction?
Feedback loop:
- Good sex probably makes a partnership more gratifying
- But a happy, loving r/s makes the sex better too
What are the norms regarding sexual fantasies?
Many of us feel ashamed about our fantasies
Problematic for sexual fulfillment and also mental health
What do people tend to fantasise about?
Almost everybody fantasies, at least occasionally, about: 1) group sex; 2) power, control, and rough sex (BDSM); 3) novelty, adventure and variety
How does sex relate to well-being?
- The frequency and quality of sex predict psychological and physical well-being
- Sex is our most pleasurable daily experience, by a lot
How does sexual frequency relate to well-being?
- More frequent sex is linked to greater happiness with life in general
- BUT: More frequent than weekly isn’t better
What is sexual afterglow?
A short-term surge in r/s satisfaction following sex
How does the intensity of sexual afterglow affect relationship satisfaction?
Spouses who experience esp. strong afterglow during a 2-week period were buffered against reductions in satisfactions over the ensuing six months
– i.e. attenuated decline
How does frequent sex buffer our r/s against other risk factors?
Highly neurotic partners tend to have less satisfying marriages, but that effect disappears among couples who have frequent sex
How do men and women differ on sexual desire?
Men tend to have higher sex drives than women do
What are the characteristics of sexual desire for men?
- Men exp more frequent and more intense sexual desires than women do
- Men are routinely more motivated to engage in sexual activity than women are
How does the difference in sexual desire for men and women affect relationships?
- Frustration and annoyance may result as heterosexual couples negotiate their sexual interactions
- Women are usually the ‘gatekeepers’ who decide when sex occurs
- And they may find men willing to offer various concessions in exchange for sex
How do men estimate a woman’s interest in sex within a long-term relationship?
- Underestimation of woman’s sexual interest as a self-protective motive
- More adaptive to protect feelings and avoid feeling hurt from rejection; gene propagation is certain in r/s
What are destiny and growth beliefs in sexual context?
Sexual chemistry vs. sexual growth
What is objectification theory?
- In general, we do not want to be objectified
- But: If women are objectified in their r/s, it may not be bad for their well-being as it attaches a value to them for sex
What is the general trajectory for sexual desire in a r/s?
Sexual desires tends to decline as the longevity of a r/s increases
Why does sexual desire decrease over time in a r/s?
- There’s an inherent tension at the heart of romantic r/s
- Intimacy thrives on familiarity and security
- But passion thrives on novelty and risk
