Scene 11

Question 1

[scene up]

Answer 1

so you don’t want to work here?

Question 2

not particularly

Answer 2

then why are you here?

Question 3

i have no interest working anywhere

Answer 3

why

Question 4

they can’t push you down

Answer 4

sounds like you’re speaking from experience

Question 5

do you still care?

Answer 5

me? I suppose it depends. i care about some things, not about others

Question 6

what do u still care about virginia?

Answer 6

i care about this job. my family. i care about my boyfriend

Question 7

doesn’t it feel like an eternity

Answer 7

uh. sure the job can be monotonous sometimes, and i don’t know if you’re a loser..

Question 8

don’t know if i’ve ever won

Answer 8

i’m just having a tough day, but the work needs to be done

Question 9

can you even remember your last easy day?

Answer 9

of course. on sunday I–

Question 10

why do you care

Answer 10

they’re my family

Question 11

so?

Answer 11

you’re just going to pick it apart anyway

Question 12

why do you care?

Answer 12

my parents raised me. i grew up alongside my brother

Question 13

because of proximity

Answer 13

they’re my blood!

Question 14

why. do you. care?

Answer 14

ok maybe i don’t at this point. maybe i feel so distant from them that.. it’s just biology that keeps me in contact

Question 15

how about this boyfriend?

Answer 15

i’m supposed to be interviewing you

Question 16

the boyfriend

Answer 16

i love him. he washes dishes. he cleans the toilet

Question 17

so?

Answer 17

the toilet’s a pretty big deal

Question 18

he does chores

Answer 18

no. but his love language is acts of service

Question 19

is he a complete server?

Answer 19

he’s not perfect. but no one is perfect

Question 20

the services where he falls short

Answer 20

i couldn’t do that. it wouldn’t be right. it would destroy him

Question 21

not once

Answer 21

how…

Question 22

through that kind of hell?

Answer 22

he’s a good man!

Question 23

why not enjoy every single moment between sufferings

Answer 23

i don’t think i can give you this job

Question 24

don’t you want that?

Answer 24

what i want.. is to find the right candidate for this human resources positions. and i’m sorry stan, that’s not you.

Question 25

tell lou to stop stealing my bit

Answer 25

what the actual fuck.. hi joel, i’m guessing you’re busy right now.. look, when i get home we need to have a talk…. welp, one last chance. come in! hi greg. thanks for coming in today

Question 26

i appreciate the opportunity

Answer 26

so tell me a little about yourself

Question 27

college for 10 years

Answer 27

i see that, but that was 7 years ago. and no employment since?

Question 28

pension for the medical bills

Answer 28

so if you’re drawing a pension, why are you applying for this position instead of focusing on your family?

Question 29

more than my pension could handle

Answer 29

i see. but then who will take care of your wife?

Question 30

funeral expenses that put me upside down

Answer 30

oh. i’m sorry to hear that

Question 31

thank you

Answer 31

obviously you have experience as a teacher, and a degree in history. but do you have any experience in human resources?

Question 32

i’m afraid that i don’t

Answer 32

ok. any experience with google suite?

Question 33

microsoft at the college

Answer 33

i see

Question 34

i’m willing to learn

Answer 34

let’s try going at this from a different angle. is there anything in your experience, training, or education that you believe could help you as an HR worker?

Question 35

alighieri and milton

Answer 35

and how does that qualify you for the position

Question 36

what not to do in an hr position

Answer 36

that kind of sounds like bullshit

Question 37

it totally is

Answer 37

i am sorry. i wish i could help but i really do need to find the perfect candidate

Question 38

thank you for considering me

Answer 38

i really do hope you find something that is the right fit