Odd Couple

Question 1

(Lights up)

Answer 1

What’ll I do with the rest of my life, Olive? I have so much of it left. If only I was seventy, seventy five I could get through it.

Question 2

I’ll tell you what you’re going to do. You’re going to start your life over and stand on your own two feet. Be independent!

Answer 2

You’re right

Question 3

Of course I am

Answer 3

That’s what I was before I was married. I was a great bookkeeper. I could have been price Waterhouse today. You’re right. Go back to work. Be independent A self sufficient woman

Question 4

You’re damn right

Answer 4

Maybe I should ask for my old job back

Question 5

Why not? Who did you work for?

Answer 5

Sidney. God, the mistakes I’ve made. Goddamn idiot! I hate me

Question 6

You don’t hate you. You love you. You think no one has problems like you

Answer 6

If only I could change. I should call Sidney

Question 7

What for?

Answer 7

To talk it out again. Maybe we left something unsaid

Question 8

Where’s your self respect? You want to crawl back on your hands and knees?

Answer 8

He wouldn’t notice. He’d think I was scrubbing the floors

Question 9

Florence listen to me… and move in here with me.

Answer 9

Won’t I be in the way?

Question 10

Of course you will

Answer 10

I’m a pest

Question 11

I know you’re a pest. I was the one who gave you the name

Answer 11

Then why do you want me to live with you?

Question 12

Because- I can’t stand living by myself either…because I’m lone,t, that’s why

Answer 12

I never thought of you as being lonely. You have so many friends

Question 13

Friends go home at eleven o’clock…. what do you want a dang ring?

Answer 13

If you really mean it olive, there’s a lot I can do around here. I’ll save us a fortune. Well need it. Because I’m not taking one single penny from Sidney

Question 14

Wait a minute lets not be hasty

Answer 14

You told me to have self respect, didn’t you? How am I going to have self respect if I take money from Sidney?

Question 15

Money is the one area where self respect doesn’t work

Answer 15

I don’t need anything from Sidney I’ll show him. I,l show him what I can do (phone rings). That’s him. That’s Sidney. I can tell his ring.

Question 16

Hello? Oh. Hello Sidney.

Answer 16

I’m not here. You didn’t see me. You don’t know where I am. I didn’t call. You can’t get in touch with me. I’m not here

Question 17

Yes. She’s here

Answer 17

DONT TELL HIM THAT, DIDNT I TELL YOU NOT TO TELL HIM THAT

Question 18

Yes. She told me everything

Answer 18

Hoe does he sound! Is he worried? What is he saying? Does he want to speak to me? Because I don’t want to speak to him.

Question 19

I agree with that Sidney

Answer 19

You agree with what? Don’t agree with him. Agree with me! I’m your friend. I can’t believe you agreed with him.

Question 20

Well, personally I think she’s taking it very well, Sidney.

Answer 20

I am NOT taking it well. I’m taking it like a crazy woman. You call thus taking it well?

Question 21

Oh I know you have, Sidney. You’ve been wonderful that way, God bless you

Answer 21

WHAT DO YOU MEAN GOD BLESS YOU DONT GOD BLESS HIM

Question 22

He sneezed, what do you want from me?

Answer 22

I’m sorry. Does he want to speak with me? Ask him if he wants to speak with me?

Question 23

Um, Sidney, would you like to talk to her?

Answer 23

Give me the phone. I’ll talk to him.

Question 24

Oh, you don’t want to talk to her?

Answer 24

He doesn’t want to talk to me?

Question 25

Yes. I see… you take care too. Good bye

Answer 25

He did t want to speak to me?

Question 26

No

Answer 26

Then why did he call?

Question 27

He just wanted to make sure you were alright

Answer 27

He did?

Question 28

He said he loves you very much and that you’re a wonderful mother and a wife.

Answer 28

He said that? … What else did he say?

Question 29

It wasn’t important

Answer 29

What else did he say.

Question 30

It was nothing

Answer 30

What else did he say?

Question 31

But as a woman, you’re crazy as a bedbug

Answer 31

Oh, really?… is that what that short, hairless, cowboy said?… well, tell him he’ll never find another woman like me if he lives to be a thousand.

Question 32

Which bedroom do you want? One you can see New Jersey, the other you can see a guy who sleeps naked

Answer 32

You know. I’m glad. Because he finally made me realize. It’s over! It didn’t sink in until just this minute

Question 33

You want some sleeping pills? Take some sleeping pills.

Answer 33

I can’t swallow them

Question 34

You can suck on them all night

Answer 34

I don’t think I believed him until just now. My marriage is really over.

Question 35

Florence, lets go to bed. I have another career besides you.

Answer 35

Somehow is doesn’t seem so bad now. I mean I think I can live with this thing