L11 Flashcards
兆
PORTENT // a pictograph of a turtle’s shell, with very individual marks on its back, and a leg sticking out. turtle’s backs can forcast the future, like football results.
// 丬turtle
桃
PEACH // japanese mythology, a couple can’t have kids, but then they catch a giant peach that falls from a tree. a boy jumps out of the peach, but this bizzare start to life is a portent of evil to come.
犬
POOCH // large is a st bernard, but this is just a drop of one in a kennel.
// chihuahua, for memory’s sake
// 犭pack of wild dogs, little nippers!
尤
REMARKABLE // the only thing that distinguishes this from a small dog is it’s remarkable human legs. it got hit by a car, then picked up by a mad sciencist/magician who, after cutting a volunteer audience member in half, stiched on their legs. “the remarkable frankenpooch, he called it”
厌
DETEST // there’s already a lot to hate about chihuahua industry, but if they were to start mass producing them, that would be detestable
状
STATE OF AFFAIRS // did you hear of the turtle who fell in love with a chihuahua? Their families were horrified, but that’s what the young do; upset the state of affairs in the name of love.
妆
PUT ON MAKEUP // you’re on the tube. the woman opposite you pulls out her pocket mirror & foundation. to your astonishment, you see it’s actually a turtle, who giggles every time she dips her brush
将
GENERAL (n.) // shown here in formal evening attire, the 5 star general is at a ball. to mark the occasion, he’s replaced his normal 5 stars with 5 turtle shells, which he’s glued to his lapel. no wonder nobody wants to dance with him… what a werido.
获
SEIZE // “sieze the day” is classically extended to “sieze the flower of the day”. Here, a Chihuahua has done just that, and is now being chased down by a pack of wild dogs. “Sieze him!”
默
SILENT // look, it’s a black chihuahua! Wait, he’s gone… there he is! Dressed in ninja gear. but wait, you can hardly hear him move… silence
然
SORT OF THING // this character has loads of uses as a suffix. “Sort of thing” chosen because we see chihuahua flesh roasting on a cooking fire, a “hot diggity, dog diggity” sort of thing
吅
CHATTERBOX // two mouths. Mark Twain “if we were meant to talk more than listen, we would have two mouths and one ear”. Wind up teeth, have a mouth at front and back. chat chat chat
哭
CRY // listen to the chihuahua chattering away, sounds a lot like a toddler sobbing
器
UTENSIL // ah. oh dear. so in the middle we’ve got a chihuahua. at the edges we have four hungry mouths. all they’re waiting for is utensils, and the carnage will then begin
臭
STINKING // our little chihuahua has got his nose in the air, jumping up towards the stinking bishop on the kitchen counter
狗
DOG // a generic term for dogs, each dog in the pack representing a letter. the pack chase you down, catch you, then line up to spell the sentence “the quick brown dog jumped over the lazy fox”
牛
COW // who has just been run over by a steamroller. his head’s lopped off, but you can still see the legs splayed.
// 牜or same as main but with bottom stick lopped off to make a flat bottom
特
SPECIAL // something in a special class, like the holy cows of india. although that’s generally a hindu practice, the Buddha’s refusal to take a life of any animal means that the grounds of a buddhist temple is a good place for such special beings.
告
DECLARE // folklore often tells of super-smart animals, and here’s a cow who’s become a judge. “by the power invested in by by the state of tennessee (he drawls with an open mouth)… I do declare…”
浩
VAST // an endless quanity of water, but in this case it’s located in the enormous mouth of an oversized mother cow. peer inside and see the watery saliva.
先
BEFORE // physical placement, not temporal. a cow with human legs, can only be a panto cow. and who’d want to be the butt? you should have got there before to be at the fore of the animal
洗
WASH // water… before. obviously. Mum says “wash your hands before you get to the table” so many times, that eventually she installs taps beside everyone’s place setting. wet, but better than it was before, without washed hands.
