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Psychology > Intimate Relationships > Flashcards

Intimate Relationships Flashcards

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1
Q

Why We Form Relationships

A
  • Attraction
  • Intimacy
  • Rewards
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2
Q

Attraction

A
  • Similarity and complementarity
  • Reciprocal Attraction
  • Competence
  • Disclosure
  • Proximity
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3
Q

Intimacy

A
  • Dimensions of Intimacy
  • Masculine and Feminine Intimacy Styles
  • Cultural Influences on Intimacy
  • The Limits of Intimacy
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4
Q

Rewards

A

Social Exchange Theory:
•We often seek out people who can give us rewards that are greater than or equal to the costs we encounter in dealing with them.
•Rewards – Costs = Outcomes

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5
Q

Models of Relational Development and Maintenance

A
  • Developmental Models

- Dialectical Perspectives

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6
Q

Developmental Models

A
  • Initiating
  • Experimenting
  • Intensifying
  • Integrating
  • Bonding
  • Differentiating
  • Circumscribing
  • Stagnating
  • Avoiding
  • Terminating
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7
Q

Social Exchange Theory:

A

We often seek out people who can give us rewards that are greater than or equal to the costs we encounter in dealing with them.

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8
Q

Developmental Models: Relational Maintenance

A 
communication aimed at keeping relationships operating smoothly and satisfactorily
•Integrating
•Bonding 
•Differentiating
•Circumscribing
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9
Q

Developmental Models: Coming Together

A
  • Initiating
  • Experimenting
  • Intensifying
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10
Q

Developmental Models: Coming Apart

A
  • Stagnating
  • Avoiding
  • Terminating
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11
Q

“The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse”

A
  1. Criticism versus Complaint
  2. Contempt
  3. Defensiveness
  4. Stonewalling
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12
Q

A complaint identifies specific action a criticism is global eg “you forgot to put gas in the car” vs “you never keep your word”

A

Criticism versus Complaint

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13
Q

A set of behaviours that communicate disgust eg eyerolling, sneering, name calling

A

Contempt

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14
Q

The behaviours send the message “it’s you, not me” –avoid any responsibilty

A

Defensiveness

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15
Q

As a result of the above one partner tunes out and acts as if they could not care less

A

Stonewalling

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16
Q

Dialectical Perspectives

A
  • Connection vs. Autonomy
  • Predictability vs. Novelty
  • Openness vs. Privacy
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17
Q

We seek involvement but at the same time we are unwilling to sacrifice our entire identity

A

Connection vs. Autonomy

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18
Q

The balance between too much familiarity and the need for change or novelty

A

Predictability vs. Novelty

19
Q

Disclosure is large part of our relationship, however we still need to maintain some space between ourselves and others

A

Openness vs. Privacy

20
Q

Strategies for Managing Dialectical Tensions:

A
  • Denial
  • Disorientation
  • Alternation
  • Balance
  • Integration
  • Recalibration
  • Reaffirmation
21
Q

Characteristics of Relational Development and Maintenance

A

Relationships are constantly changing

-Movement is always to a new place

22
Q

The process of deliberately revealing information about oneself that is significant and that would not normally be known by others

A

Self-Disclosure

23
Q

Degrees of Self- Disclosure: Social penetration model

A
  • Breadth

- Depth

24
Q

Degrees of Self- Disclosure

A
  • Cliches
  • Facts
  • Opinions
  • Feelings
25
Q

Ritualized stock responses to social situations, virtually the opposite of self disclosure- “nice weather we are having, hey?”

A

Cliches

26
Q

“I’m engaged and getting married on September 14th” when meeting a stranger

A

Facts

27
Q

“I wish we were getting married at Christmas” or “I want a small wedding”

A

Opinions

28
Q

“I feel worried about the whole thing” or “I am so excited and happy!”

A

Feelings

29
Q

A Model of Self Disclosure: Johari Window

A
  • open area
  • blind area
  • hidden area
  • unknown area
30
Q

Information of which both you and the other person are aware

A

open area

31
Q

Information of which you are unaware but of which the other person is aware

A

blind area

32
Q

Information you know but will not share

A

hidden area

33
Q

Information unknown to you and others

A

unknown area

34
Q

Characteristics of Self-Disclosure

A
  • Self-disclosure usually occurs in dyads.
  • Self-disclosure occurs incrementally.
  • Relatively few transactions involve high levels of self-disclosure.
  • Self-disclosure is relatively scarce.
  • Self-disclosure usually occurs in the context of positive relationships.
35
Q

Reasons for Self-Disclosure

A
  • Catharsis
  • Self-Clarification
  • Self-Validation
  • Reciprocity
  • Identity Management
  • Relationship Maintenance and Enhancement
  • Social Control
  • Manipulation
36
Q
  • Is the other person important to you?
  • Is the risk of disclosing reasonable?
  • Is the disclosure relevant to the situation at hand?
  • Are the amount and type of disclosure appropriate?
  • Will the effect be constructive?
  • Is the self-disclosure clear and understandable?
  • Is the disclosure reciprocated?
A

Guidelines for Self-Disclosure

37
Q

Alternatives to Self-Disclosure

A
  • Lying
  • Equivocating
  • Hinting
  • The Ethics of Evasion
38
Q

Is defined (at least by the teller) as unmalicious, or even helpful to the person to whom it is told

A

White Lie

39
Q

Reasons for Lying

A
  1. To save face
  2. To avoid tension/conflict
  3. To guide social interaction
  4. To expand or reduce relationships
  5. To gain power
40
Q

Ambiguous language that has two or more equally plausible meanings.

A

Equivocal language

41
Q

The value of equivocation:

A
  • It spares the receiver from embarrassment.
  • It can save face for both the sender and receiver.
  • It provides an alternative to lying.
42
Q

Hinting

A

A hint seeks to get a desired response from another person

43
Q

Some argue that the morality of a speaker’s motives for lying ought to be judged, not the lie itself, and others ask whether the effects of a lie will be worth the deception.

A

The Ethics of Evasion

Psychology (5 decks)

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