Intimacy Flashcards
“______-_____” interactions impact interpersonal relations
What some ways this is done?
Macro-micro
Different ways:
Gender role socialization
○ Racial, body size and other inequities
○ Sexual stigmitization
○ Stereotyping
○ Mainstream media depictions, etc.
What is shame?
How can this affect sex?
Shame:
“An intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance and belonging.”
“something wrong with me” “I am bad / wrong”
Shame is one way we are impacted by stigmatizing/ judging msgs
Invites conformity to dominant ideas/ behaviours etc.
They are often shaped by negative societal meanings, leading to feelings of shame
Shame around sex varies by culture, and in many societies, including the U.S., it is used to regulate sexual expression
Our beliefs about sex are influenced by family, culture, and religion, which can negatively judge certain behaviors, like sex outside marriage or LGBTQ+ identities
What is vunerability?
How can this affect sex?
Vulnerability is emotionally trusting, dismantling walls of isolation
○ Even when it is hard
○ Even after you have been hurt
Vulnerability as being raw, real, emotionally trusting, and choosing to gently dismantle your walls of protection
Vulnerability allows us to feel joy (and fear) and connect with others
Sex IS vulnerable
What is intimacy?
How does this affect sex?
Intimacy - “Into me you see”
Physical, emotional, mental, spiritual connection
At its core = requires vulnerability
Show up - be our authentic selves (not performative)
This is what intimacy is about – the things that matter most to us as humans in the long run
Once we know this, we can start to build skills and make new choices, even if they are difficult and uncomfortable
Fear of being vulnerable = leads to avoiding “_________” up = which results in avoiding “________”
Opening; intimacy
Summarize Ted talk power of vulnerability Brene Brown
.
Vulnerability is the building block…
What are the 4 aspects that balance upon it?
Performance & disconnect
Fear & shame
Intimacy
Joy & love
What is mindfulness?
How does this affect sex?
Strategies to support vulnerability & intimacy
Know yourself:
○ Non-judgmental observation
○ Non reactive - stay with feelings
○ Not about feeling good, but tapping into feelings/bodily sensations, etc
Her studies have also found that an increase in mindfulness skills can assist in overall sexual sat-
isfaction, and a reduction in vulva pain and emotional distress (including from past sexual trauma)
Researchers are also finding that mindfulness interventions can help with erectile concerns and anxiety issues connected to low sexual
desire
Greater mindfulness skills are also correlated with a host of positive aspects for relationships, including greater relationship satisfaction, effective communication, being more nonjudgmental and open with one’s partner, increased feelings of closeness, and decreased feelings of relationship distress
Linked to self-acceptance and higher sexual satisfaction
What is compassion?
How does this affect sex?
Notice discomfort and want to do something about it
Self or other focussed
*Not pity (looking down/ power )
See all humans deserving of kindness and understanding
Opposite of sexual coercion
What is compassion?
How does this affect sex?
In sexual relationships, compassion is essential for respect and mutual well-being, while coercion (pressuring or guilt-tripping) is its opposite.
Self-compassion and setting boundaries are important even though they can feel challenging.
Healthy sexuality requires balancing care for yourself with care for others, ensuring respect, comfort, and mutual consent.
