Increasing Likeability

Question 1

How can I make more friends in 2 months than in 2 years?

Answer 1

Be genuinely interested in them, rather than getting them interested in me

Question 2

The authors who don’t care about others can be spotted within the first few paragraphs

Answer 2

I have to be interested in people if I want to be successful

Question 3

Many magicians look at the audience and say “there’s a bunch of suckers out there. I’ll fool them all right”

What does Thurston say?

Answer 3

“I am grateful because these people come to see me. They make it possible for me to make my living in a very agreeable way. I’m going to give them the very best I possibly can.”

Question 4

How can I get the most sought after people’s attention?

Answer 4

Be genuinely interested in them. All people, including kings like people who admire them

Question 5

How are some ways to show genuine interest?

Answer 5

Put myself out to do things for other people - things that require time, energy, unselfishness, and thoughtfulness

E.g. remember all friends’ birthdays. Say “hello” in pleasing tones.

Question 6

Famous Roman poet, Publilius Syrus (100 BC) said…

Answer 6

“We are interested in others when they are interested in us.”

Question 7

Face expression vs clothes. Which is more important?

Answer 7

The expression one wears on one’s face

Question 8

What happened in the doctor’s waiting room, when all patients were feeling distraught?

Answer 8

A mum with a baby came in. The baby gave a great big smile: conversation struck up, soon the entire reception room joined in.

Boredom and tension was converted into a pleasure and enjoyment.

Question 9

How can I make a positive impression through phone calls?

Answer 9

Smile as I am talking. The smile comes through the voice.

Bonus - be passionate in talking and be interested in them. Praise them.

Question 10

What should I do when I don’t feel like smiling?

Answer 10

Act as if I am happy

• Sit up cheerfully
• Act and speak cheerfully
• Force a smile

Question 11

Where can happiness be found?

Answer 11

It relies on inner conditions. Not outward

Question 12

What did Shakespeare say about the way of thinking?

Answer 12

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so”

Question 13

Whenever I go outdoors…

Answer 13

Draw the chin in
Carry the crown of my head high
Fill my lungs to the upmost
Drink in the sunshine 
Greet friends with a smile 
Pour soul into every handshake

Question 14

How can I hold the right mental attitude when going outdoors…

Answer 14

Keep my mind on the great that I want to do
Picture myself as the able, earnest, and useful person that I desire to be
Be courageous and have a good cheer

We become what our hearts are fixed on

Question 15

What did the ancient Chinese say about smiling?

Answer 15

“A man without a smiling face must not open a shop.”

Question 16

How can I relieve pressure from myself and/or others?

Answer 16

Smile. It makes one realise that all is not hopeless

Question 17

What was Jim Farley’s secret to success? And what’s his method?

Answer 17

He can recall 50,000 people by their first names.

Every new person, he found out their complete name, some facts about their family, and opinions in that certain topic. A year from then, he should be able to talk about them.

Question 18

What method did Andrew Carnegie use to feed his rabbits?

Answer 18

He told the boys and girls in the neighbourhood that if they collected enough clover and dandelions to feed rye rabbits, he would name the bunnies in their honour

Question 19

How can I be interesting?

Answer 19

Be legitimately interested. Ask questions that the other person will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments

Question 20

What can I hold (body) to encourage them to feel listened?

Answer 20

Eyes mild and genial - soul penetrating gaze
Voice low and kind
Gestures few
Full attention given
Appreciation of what’s being said, even if it’s said badly

Question 21

How does one get laughed at behind their backs and despised?

Answer 21

Never listening to anyone for long
Talk incessantly about oneself
If one has an idea while other person is taking, don’t wait for them to finish: busy right in and interrupt their sentence

Question 22

When irritated, dissatisfied, or hurt people want to talk, what is their intentions?

Answer 22

They do not want advice. They want merely a friendly, sympathetic listener to whom he could unburden himself

Question 23

What’s the problem with thinking about what to say next?

Answer 23

One fails to make a favourable impression because he doesn’t listen intensively.

Question 24

How can I show my love and that I care for another person?

Answer 24

Whenever they want to talk, stop whatever I’m doing and listen to them

Question 25

What did Mr Chalif do to get 5 boys + himself to stay in Europe for a week when he hoped for only 1?

Answer 25

He found out what fee was interested in (got him warmed up) and let him speak about that (his interests)

Question 26

Why isn’t knowing the other person’s interests crucial? And what did Roosevelt do about it?

Answer 26

The royal Ross to a person’s heart is to talk about the things he or she treasures most. Roosevelt sat up the night before reading upon the subject in which he knew his guests were interested in.

Question 27

Many people do not appreciate nice things about other people. How can I be different?

Answer 27

Everybody craves a little human warmth and a little genuine appreciation. When I give that, they will express gratitude and be willing to help me. But, I need to genuinely mean that praise.

Question 28

What is the unvarnished truth that almost all people feel about themselves compare to me?

Answer 28

They all feel superior to me in some way. A sure way to their hearts is to let them realise in some subtle way that I recognise their importance. “Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him”

Question 29

Courtesies are the hallmark of good breeding. What are some examples?

Answer 29

``` “I’m sorry to trouble you” “Would you be so kind as to...” “Won’t you please?” “Would you mind?” “Thank you” ```

Question 30

How? When? Where? Should I give importance to others?

Answer 30

All the time. Everywhere

Question 31

Do I always need to expect something in return by complimenting?

Answer 31

No! The feeling that I have done something for him without his being able to do anything whatever in return for me - that’s a feeling that flows and sings in my memory long after the incident is past!