Difficult People Flashcards
“I don’t mean to sound rude but…”
“You’re right, that did sound rude”
Step 1 of 2 in arguing better
Show them you’re listening before you attack or disagree. Ask them to elaborate elaborate elaborate.
Step 2 of 2 for better arguing
Use the word “together” and tackle the problem, not the person
If someone is saying something with no evidence
“What information would change your opinion?”
Way 1 of showing authority
“In these types of situations, I typically like to…”
Replace the word “help” with __________
Whatever you need. If a jar needs opening, use “strength”. If the printer isn’t working, use “printer skills”. Etc…
When someone yells
“I don’t respond to that volume”
When someone interrupts you
“I can’t hear you when we interrupt each other”
1 Golden Rule
NO HESITATION
When you feel the first sign of anger from someone
Treat it like panic symptoms. “Is that the best you got? Bring it on, bitch!”
“and these Trump supporters.. don’t get me started on them”
“I see we have different views on this topic. Let’s change the subject.”
How do I ease tension in interactions?
Each second spent looking for your reflection in the other person’s eyes eases tension
What do I say after telling someone they seem very intelligent?
“and I’m not saying that to patronize you”
What do you do when you can absolutely feel someone is annoyed by you?
Treat it like panic. “Is that all you’ve got, bitch?”
What to do when someone laughs at what you’re saying
Laugh with them
What do you say (and what shouldn’t you say) when someone apologizes?
Say “thank you (for the apology)” not “it’s okay”
If someone is brief with their response - ex. “I am in a hurry”
You repeat the last few words. Ex. “In a hurry”?
“Wait so if you hate when people talk too much, what about me? Do you think I talk too much?”
“I think what I really value is when there’s a good back and forth conversation, where everyone gets a chance to speak. It keeps things more interesting for me.”
If someone doesn’t say hi back or you’re welcome or something else
Instead of having thoughts of how annoyed you are, imagine them as vividly as you can not only having replied with the minimum, but imagine a whole great interaction ending amazingly
Manager: “You should have known better”
Please provide specific feedback so I can correct this and avoid similar mistakes
Manager: “I don’t care about your personal problems”
“I need to manage work and personal issues effectively. How can we address this situation professionally?”
How to never be told you sound aggressive again?
MELODY and end on a low pitch!
Someone talks negatively about Trump
“You’re not a fan, huh?”
Phrase to repeat during confrontations
“I want to work together to find a solution”
