ch9 - relationships & attraction

Question 1

Why do we need relationships from an evolutionary perspective?

Answer 1

Romantic - to pass on offspring
Parental - to ensure kids survive past independence
Kin - Cooperation & reciprocity for survival

Question 2

Do people survive better single or in relationships?

Answer 2

in relationships

Question 3

What are the 2 fundamental kinds of relationships?

Answer 3

Communal relationships
Exchange relationships

Question 4

Communal relationship

What cultures favour this?

Answer 4

A relationship in which the individuals feel a special responsibility for one another and give and receive according to the principle of need. Such relationships are often long term.

East asian

Question 5

Exchange relationship

What cultures favour this?

Answer 5

A relationship in which individuals feel little responsibility toward one another; giving and receiving are governed by concerns about equity and reciprocity. Such relationships are short term.

Western.

Question 6

Social exchange theory

Answer 6

A theory based on the idea that how people feel about a relationship depends on their assessments of its Costs & Benefits

Question 7

Comparison level

Answer 7

Expectations people have about what they should get out of a relationship

Question 8

Comparison level for alternatives

Answer 8

Expectations people have about what they can get out of available alternative relationships

Question 9

Equity theory

Answer 9

The idea that people are motivated to pursue fairness, or equity, in their relationships, or equity, in their relationships. A relationship is considered equitable when the ratio of C&B is similar for both parties.

*Equity is less of a goal in collectivist cultures

Question 10

Attachment theory

Answer 10

The idea that early attachments with parents & other caregivers can shape relationships for a person’s whole life.

Question 11

Ainsworth’s strange situation

Answer 11

Infants + caregivers in room with many interesting toys
Stranger walks in, caregiver leaves

-Securely attached infants had caregivers who responded quickly & reliably to distressed cries.
-Anxiously attached infants were anxious even when parent was in room, and caregivers were less reliable in responding to infant distress, and responded inconsistently; children were less comfortable with their contact after they left
-Avoidant attached children had parents who frequently rejected their infants. The least likely to seek out the caregiver, sometimes rejecting caregiver’s attention.

Question 12

Anxiety dimension of attachment

Answer 12

The degree to which a person is worried about rejection/abandonment by relationship partners

Question 13

Avoidance dimension of attachment

Answer 13

The degree to which a person is comfortable with intimacy and dependence on relationship partners

Question 14

Low avoidance dimension of attachment + low anxiety dimension of attachment = ?

Answer 14

Securely attached person.

Question 15

Why are attachment styles pervasive?

Answer 15

What your parents teach you is what you expect
Self-fulfilling prophecy. If you are anxious to avoid rejection, you reject first.

Question 16

Do attachment styles evolve?

Answer 16

Yes

Question 17

Are attachment styles global?

Answer 17

No, western world mainly.

Question 18

What affects attraction?

Answer 18

Proximity

Question 19

Functional distance (proximity for attraction)

Answer 19

The influence of physical layout that encourages or inhibits certain activities, including contact between people.

Question 20

What is the largest kind of unusual relationship formed by functional proximity

Answer 20

Between people of different ages & backgrounds

Question 21

Mere exposure effect

Answer 21

The idea that repeated exposure to a stimulus, such as an object or a person, leads to greater liking of the stimulus.

Question 22

What is the limit of exposures for mere exposure effect?

Answer 22

35x, after which your liking decreases.

Question 23

What does mere exposure effect work/not work on?

Answer 23

Works on
paintings, photographs, geometric shapes
Doesnt work on
Auditory sounds, stimuli u initially disliked.

Question 24

Why does mere exposure increase liking?

Answer 24

Easier to cognitively process familiar stimuli
Repeated exposure to something with no negative consequences -> comfortable attachment to it.

Question 25

What kinds of similarity are most common in relationships?

Answer 25

non-interracial
1. demographic
2. physical
3. personality
interracial
1. personality

Question 26

Why are we attracted to similar people?

Answer 26

-Consensual validation: affirmation of my values + attitudes.
-More confident that they will like me too

Question 27

Complementarity

Answer 27

The tendency for people to seek out others with characteristics that are different from, and that complement, their own.

Question 28

When does complementarity make sense?

Answer 28

When one person’s needs can be filled by the other person’s difference.

Question 29

Status exchange hypothesis

Answer 29

Romantic attraction increases when two individuals offer each other elevated status where they themselves are lacking.

Question 30

Halo effect

Answer 30

The common belief that attractive individuals possess a host of positive qualities beyond their physical attractiveness.

Question 31

What do people assume are the only 2 drawbacks of pretty ppl (linked to halo effect)

Answer 31

immodest
bad parents

Question 32

For which gender is attractiveness more important for survival?

Answer 32

Women
Beauty = power for women

Question 33

Reproductive fitness

Answer 33

The capacity to pass one’s genes on to subsequent generations

Justification for why we like pretty people.

Question 34

What makes a face attractice

Answer 34

Geometrical, average features, symmetrical.

Question 35

Evolutionarily, what mates should men and women seek?

Answer 35

Women: men with resources to support their baby
Men: young women that are fertile.

Question 36

What was the main hypothesis of Wood, who criticised the evolutionary idea that women seek men with resources for biological reasons

Answer 36

She says that wealth, similarity can explain women choosing men with resources.

In countries where there is equal power over material resources, women don’t find mates with status and economic resources as much, confirming her theory.

Question 37

What are the 3 categories of love?

Answer 37

Companionate love (friends + family)
Compassionate love (communal relationships, linked to responding to others’ needs i.e. parents putting kids’ needs above theirs)
Romantic love (romantic partners, ‘in love’, passionate love)

Question 38

What’s the timeline of feelings in a relationship

Answer 38

Intense passion & love at the start that ebbs into a sense of intimacy.

Question 39

Investment model of commitment

Answer 39

A model of interpersonal relationships that maintains that there are three determinants that make partners more committed to each other
1. Relationship satisfaction
2. Few alternative partners
3. Investments into the relationship (yours, theirs. yours will increase theirs, and vice versa)

Question 40

Perceived partner responsiveness

Answer 40

The degree to which people perceive their partners as being understanding, validating, and responsive to their needs.

Question 41

Why is commitment linked to long relationships?

Answer 41

B/c it encourages behaviours that are good for the relationship, like sacrifice.

Question 42

What kind of person is more likely to divorce?

Answer 42

Neurotic, anxious people
People with low self esteem
Low SES (money problems, responding to chronic stress with ‘self-protection’)
Younger people

Question 43

How do people with low self esteem sabotage relationships?

Answer 43

By assuming if they have relationship doubts that the other person does too

By rejecting their partner ‘first’ as a defense mechanism

Question 44

What are the 4 destructive behaviours that predict the end of a relationship

Answer 44

1. Criticism
2. Stonwalling
3. Defensiveness
4. Contempt

Question 45

What construal process is detrimental to marital relationships?

Answer 45

1. Blame (expect good things to be ‘wins’ done for selfish reasons & blame bad things on chronic partner issues)

Question 46

How to create stronger bonds in a relationship?

Answer 46

1. Conversation, focusing on the good in our lives, with enthusiasm from both parties. [western societies only]
2. Being playful + silly (we misattribute our feelings of silly happiness from the activity onto our feelings for our partners)
3. Idealising / finding good in your partners + them doing that to you too.

Question 47

How do satisfied people idealise their partners?

Answer 47

1. More likely to see virtue in their partners’ faults
2. More likely to offer ‘yes but’ refutations of the fault (bright sides!)