Act 1 Scene 2

Question 1

Claire: In the car. We had an accident. Brand new BMW. Two days old the side door is smashed in. Don’t tell Charlie and Mira I don’t want to ruin tonight for them.

Answer 1

Me: Oh my God! Are you hurt?

Question 2

Claire: My lip is swelling up oh Jesus I look like a trumpet player

Answer 2

Me: Where’s Lenny

Question 3

Claire: He’s coming. He’s walking slowly he’s got whiplash. His seatbelt right around his neck and pulled him straight up. I left a dangling.

Answer 3

Me: Oh sweetheart I’m sorry. Is there anything I can do?

Question 4

Lenny: Hi Charlie hi Myra we’re here kids.

Answer 4

Me; They’re upstairs Lenny

Question 5

Lenny; did she tell you what happened? Some stupid bastard shoots out of the garage like a Polaris rocket. I’ve got four doors on one side of the car now.

Answer 5

Me: how does your neck feel?

Question 6

Lenny: Stretched out over to one side I look like a Modigliani painting.

Answer 6

Me: do you want to drink?

Question 7

Lenny: A brand new spotless car never touched by human hands. Buffed and polished by German women in Munich and now it looks like a war memorial. Hello? This is Leonard Gantz. Is Dr. Dudley there please

Answer 7

Me: Dr. Dudley

Question 8

Lenny: Yes it is. I have a whiplash injury. I see. Do you know what theater he’s in?

Answer 8

Me: Oh God I need a cigarette so badly

Question 9

Claire: i’ve got to settle my stomach is there anything to eat some canopies or something?

Answer 9

Me: Gee I don’t see anything

Question 10

Claire: no canopies? Where’s the cook, Mai Li?  she makes great canapés 

Answer 10

Me: Mai Li? I didn’t see her. I think she’s off this week.

Question 11

Claire: the week of their anniversary party?

Answer 11

Me: I think she had to go back to Japan. Her mother was sick.

Question 12

Claire: Mai Li is Chinese

Answer 12

Me: I know. Her mother was visiting Japan.

Question 13

Lenny: I can only look up. I hope y’all people are coming to this party. Where’s Ken

Answer 13

Ken? He went to the bathroom

Question 14

Lenny: and where’s Charlie and Myra?

Answer 14

Me: they’re still getting dressed

Question 15

Lenny: no nuts or pretzels? I didn’t even have lunch today three goddamn audits with the IRS on an empty stomach Claire get me a Diet Coke please and something to munch on.

Answer 15

Me: where are you going?

Question 16

Lenny: to the John. I haven’t had the chance to do that either

Answer 16

Me: there’s a guest powder room down here

Question 17

Lenny: isn’t Ken using that

Answer 17

Me: no he’s using the one in the guest bedroom upstairs

Question 18

Lenny: Why didn’t he use this one?

Answer 18

Me: I don’t know. He said he had to go badly and he ran upstairs.

Question 19

Lenny: If he had to go so bad the one downstairs is closer

Answer 19

Me: you know how it is when you have to go badly. You don’t want to stop running.

Question 20

Lenny: that’s why they build guest bathrooms. If Dr. Dudley calls I’ll be right out.

Answer 20

Me: Claire we have to talk

Question 21

Claire: what is it

Answer 21

Me: I’m coming apart at the seams

Question 22

Claire: your dress?

Answer 22

Me: no my nerves. I think I’m gonna crack.

Question 23

Claire: I can see. Your hands are like ice. Something is going on here isn’t it?

Answer 23

Me: oh god you’re so smart. You’re so quick to see things.

Question 24

Claire: you’re scaring me Chris. Tell me what’s happening.

Answer 24

Me: well all right. Ken and I arrived here about ten minutes ago when we suddenly heard this enormous

Question 25

Ken: hey Claire you look lovely

Answer 25

Me: yes I was just telling her that. She looks enormously well doesn’t she? Isn’t that the dress you wore for cerebral palsy?

Question 26

Claire: He’s in the John. Where is Charlie and Myra?

Answer 26

Me: still getting dressed?

Question 27

Ken: up here! Quick! Hurry up! What did you tell her?

Answer 27

Me: I can’t remember

Question 28

Ken: you can’t remember?

Answer 28

Me: I couldn’t follow but I was talking so fast. Why can’t we tell them the truth? They’re going to find out anyway.

Question 29

Ken: I don’t know the truth yet. Charlie is still mumbling. Now go inside. He wants to see you.

Answer 29

Me: see me? Why does he want to see me?

Question 30

Ken: he’s crying like a baby. I can’t stop him. He needs a woman.

Answer 30

Me: to do what

Question 31

Ken: to cry on. I can reason with him but I can’t comfort him. Let him cry on your shoulder for two minutes for chrissake

Answer 31

Me: is he still bleeding? I paid $1800 for this dress.