9. Grieving Special Types of Losses Flashcards
What are the special types of losses?
Suicide
Homicide
Sudden Death
Abortion
Anticipated Death
AIDS
Sudden Infant Death
Miscarriage
Stillbirth
Euthanasia
Disaster
Epidemic / Pandemic
What are things people feel when a loved one commits suicide?
Shame
Stigma
Guilt
Intense Anger
Low Self Esteem
Blame the person
Who are at a higher rate to commit suicide?
Elderly and teens
What are ways we can counsel survivors of Suicide victims?
- Reality test the guilt and blame
- Correct denial and distortions
- Explore fantasies of the future
- Work with anger
- Reality test the sense of abandonment
- Help them in their quest to find meaning of death
What are often citied homicides (but not limited to)?
- Illegal drug trafficking
- Domestic violence
- Gang activities
What are common bereaved typical reactions for the families of those who were murdered?
- Numbness
- Rage
- Guilt
- Fear
- Depression
What are things to remember when it comes to sudden death / violent death?
- Occurs without warning
- Feelings of guilt
- Need to blame
- Medical and legal authorities
- Sense of helplessness
- Unfinished business
What does SIDS stand for?
Sudden Infant Death Syndroms
What is the leading cause of death in babies from 1 month to 1 year of age?
SIDS
What’s another term for SIDS?
Cot / Crib death
What is the cause of SIDS?
There is no definite cause
Does the legal system get involved in cases of SIDDS? Why or why not?
Yes to check if it was SIDS or negligence
How many pregnancies end in miscarriage?
About 1/5 to 1/3
Why is the grief more intense the longer the pregnancy went before a miscarriage?
Because the bond was being formed as well as major milestones such as having the nursery ready and baby shower
What are things to remember when it comes to a miscarriage?
- Socially negated loss
- Sense of isolation in culture of motherhood
- Self Blame
- Father may feel powerless
- Men and women focus on the lost dream
- In laws or society like to get involved and talk shit about the woman
Is everything that’s true for a miscarriage also pertain to stillbirths?
Yes
What is something we have to recognize when there’s a stillbirth?
Parents have sustained a real loss, a death
What’s the best adaption to stillbirths?
- Similar coping styles
- More open communication
What should we as funeral directors be prepared for when it pertains to infants?
- Be prepared for mother to not want to let go of the baby
- Some parents, at funeral, may want to hold baby, take out of casket, and that’s ok. Let them
- If parents don’t want the casket at the funeral, that’s ok, take it away.
What are things to consider when it comes to abortions?
- Socially negated
- Unspeakable loss
- Most would rather forget
- Lack of emotional support
- Counseling (pre and post abortion)
- Delayed Grief
When do people begin to experience Anticipation Grief?
Prior to loss
What is a risk with Anticipation Grief?
Early emotional withdrawal
What is the point of hospice?
Helps with the care of the dying individual
Not treat the disease, treat the person
Goal is to make individual comfortable
In early years, what was seen as a gay disease?
HIV / AIDS
Who is mainly affected by HIV / AIDS?
Women
Children
Minorities
What do survivors of HIV / AIDS tend to feel?
Rejection
Judgement
Anger
Guilt
True or False
Some families will abandon an individual with HIV / AIDS (including babies)
True
What is the most controversial topic?
Euthanasia
What is the main reason for euthanasia?
Recognize and respond to the needs of terminally ill patients
What are things felt during Natural Disasters?
Shock
Feeling overwhelmed
Panic
Anxiety
Anger
Irritability
Survivor’s guilt
PTSD
How can people cope with natural disasters?
▪️Allow yourself to express emotions
▪️Don’t hesitate to accept support
▪️Give yourself time to heal
▪️ Re-establish to regular routines
▪️ Take time to relax
▪️Avoid major life decisions
How is denial involved in epidemic / pandemic?
You believe the virus will not affect you
How is anger involved in epidemic/ pandemic?
The government can’t control me
How is bargaining involved in an epidemic/ pandemic?
If I follow the govt for a little bit, everything will all be ok again soon
How is sadness / depression involved in an epidemic / pandemic?
You begin to freak because you don’t know when this will end
How is acceptance involved in an epidemic/ pandemic?
You just admit this shit is happening
