midterm test 2- miller Flashcards
(Miller 7,8,9)
building blocks of friendship
affection (trust, respect, loyal, authentic)
communion (reliable help and support)
companionship (share interest and activities and sources of fun)
friendship vs love
more flexible, less obligations
capitalization
good friends enhance our delight when we share good news with them
four types of social support
physical comfort- hugs and cuddling
material support- form of money and goods
advice support- form of information and guidance
emotional support- affection and acceptance,
social support effect on happiness
- income has less effect on happiness than level of social support
-mental health and physiological benefits
- help feel closer to the person
insecure people vs secure
support less effective,
secure people give best support and help- attentive and empathic to help what partners need
a happy friend can increase the chance of us being happy by, and our friends friend by
15%
10%- even if never met them
friend gains weight
57%
you will too
friend gets lonely
52% become lonely too
perceived partner responsiveness
judgment that someone is attentive, caring, supportive, and powerfully rewarding
stages of friendship across the life cycle
childhood- cognitive development change
- interpersonal needs are more important at different ages
elementary school- acceptance
middle school- intimacy (friends of similar age and interest )
high school- sexuality
time spent with family
35% in 5th grade
14% time high school senior
stages of life- friendship development
young adulthood
midlife
young adulthood- intimacy or isolation
- interact with fewer friends, have deeper interdependent relationships with the friends they do have
midlife
- dyadic withdrawal- see more of lover and less of their friends, settle into romantic relationship
Older Adults
Smaller social networks, just as many close friends but spend less time with casual friends
Socioemotional selectivity theory:
focused on their present instead of the future
- seak quality not quantity in relationships
Focus on present not the future as you get oldet
safe haven switch
age 14
from family to peers
shy
Look at others less
Smile less
Speak less often
Converse less responsively
Stand further away
Shy concern over others evaluations
timid, awkward social behavior, low eye contact, low self disclosure, and low responsiveness
Negative impressions on others, perceived to be unfriendly
Others responses less engaging, less disclosing and more distant
best friend characteristics
knowledge
trust
interdependence
commitment
what is loneliness
deprived from the need to belong\
1/8 Americans live alone
social isolation vs emotional isolation
social isolation- people are dissatisfied because they lack a social network of friends and acquaintances
Emotional isolation- people are lonely because they lack a single intense relationship
- 27 % lonely
- 12% social and emotional isolation
triangular love
Triangular theory of love. (need these to love)
Intimacy- feelings of warmth, understanding, communications, support, and sharing
Passion- sexual desire, excitement, and need
Commitment- feelings of permanence, with a decision to work to maintain the relationship
types of love
“Liking”
“Infatuation”
“Empty love”
“Romantic love”
“Companionate love”
“Fatuous love-
“Consummate love”
“Liking” someone- intimacy is high, passion and commitment are both very low
“Infatuation” strong passion without any intimacy or commitment
“Empty love” commitment without intimacy or passion
“Romantic love” intimacy and passion are high
“Companionate love” intimacy and commitment are high, passion is low
- does not depend on passion
“Fatuous love- foolish/silly” passion and commitment are high, intimacy is low
“Consummate love” intimacy, passion, commitment present to a substantial degree
oxytocin and dopamine role in love
- promotes sense of well being and comfort
- relaxation, reduces stress, warmer and kinder
dopamine
- reward and pleasure
age of sex
age 17 is average for both men and woman
age 20 only 20% has not had sex
extradyadic sex
sex with someone elses partner, outside teh relationship
how likely is it for one to cheat
21% woman/ 32% man sexually unfaithful to their partner
More likely to cheat if dating or cohabitiating
Sociosexual orientations
Believes and behaviours that describe our feelings about sex
Distinguish who is most likely to cheat
Consensual non- monogamy
relationship
three different types
Swingers- have sex outside of a relationship, together as a couple
Polyamory- love affairs sexual and romantic with more than one person
Open relationship- have sex with others, but avoid romantic or emotional attachments
Pluralistic ignorance-
wrongly believe that their feelings and beliefs are different from those of others (underestimate how often their peers use condoms and overestimate hoe frequently they have causal sex
same sex marriage statistics
31- think same sex marriage should be illegal
61- support
74- marriage equality
1/3 opposed to ideal of same sex marriage
gay uncles better relationship with nieces and nephews
4 motives for having sex
emotional- shows love and commitment
physical- attractiveness, pleasure gained
insecurity- boost self item
pragmatic- attain a goal, baby, jealous
frequency of sex over age 70
43% men
22% woman
over 70 engaged in sex over the last 12 months
extradyadic sex
sex with someone else’s partner, outside relationship
cheating percentage
21% woman
32% man sexually unfaithful to their partner
illusion of unique invulnerability
faulty decision making
sexual arousal
intoxication changes focus
pluralistic ignorance
wrongly believe that their feelings and beliefs are different from those of others
- underestimate how often peers use condoms
-overestimate how often they have casual sex
shy people impact on relationships
what effect does loneliness have
physiological effects- direct impact on health
- have higher blood pressure, and weaker immune systems
- over the age of 50 more likely to die in the next 6 years than those with richer connections to others
