Love and Marriage HB Flashcards
What is one of the most important contexts for influencing positive and negative health behaviors?
family
What can you use a patients family for?
using family dynamic to improve patient compliance and outcomes
Is marrriage correlated with better or worse wellbeing? Why?
better (less mortality, less morbidity)
may be a protective factor
Engage in less risky behavior when married, social support
Does marriage effect men and women differently? How?
yes
men-> better health
women-> depends on quality of marriage
What is Gottman’s love lab?
it was a research project where couples spend the weekend in a camera rigged apartment to study communication patterns and physiologic patterns and was able to predict with 95% accuracy whether or not a couple would divorce.
What are the four horsemen of the apocalypse?
the four behaviors that are predictive of divorce
1) crticism -> attacking your partner’s personality or character rather than a specific behavior, usually with blame.
2) contempt-> communication with the intent to insult and psychologically abuse your partner
3) defensiveness-> being defensive, playing the victim, denying responsibility, making excuses, cross complaining and repeating yourself
4) stonewalling-> withdrawing from a discussion, most frequently seen in men
What should you do other than criticism?
complain
What is this:
attacking your partner’s personality or character rather than a specific behavior, usually with blame.
criticsm
What is this:
communication with the intent to insult and psychologically abuse your partner
contempt
What is this:
being defensive, playing the victim, denying responsibility, making excuses, cross complaining and repeating yourself
defensiveness
What is this:
withdrawing from a discussion most frequently seen in men.
stonewalling
Is arguing bad for a relationship?
No, it his how you argue that matters
What is the magic number for arguing?
5; use 5 positive behaviors
i.e. humor, affection, acknowledging the partners point of view….. etc.
When you fight fair, a happy couple will be able to do what?
exit the argument gracefully
backing down, gossip, use humor, and return to argument later when you are in a better frame of mind
Should you go to bed angry?
Yes, just sleep on your anger to soften it and wake up later and talk about it
Is affect important?
Affect means passion, so be passionate but no too passionate
What is a good way to treat differences?
acceptance
Gottman did a same-sex couple love lab and what did he conclude?
that relationship satisfaction and quality were the same for gay and lesbian and heterosexual couples
ALSO found there were same amounts of rate of divorce
What did Kurdeks same sex couple research find?
gay relationships operate on the same principles as heterosexual couples. And have the same satisfaction in couples.