interpersonal attraction Flashcards
what is interpersonal attraction in reference to
friendships and romantic relationships
-often times the factors that affect these relationships will be the same
explain the need to belong
humans have a pervasive need to belong
-it is natural, and when people do not have an interest in other humans it is a characteristic of autism (avoiding eye contact at a young age)
what are the 3 factors that influence attraction
similarity, proximity, and physical attractiveness
explain the first rule of attraction “we like similar others”
we are more attracted to the people who are similar in personality, race, religion, interests, socioeconomic status, political views, values, demographics, etc
what is a common theme in people who are married
they are much more similar than people who are divorced, just dating, etc
what did the meta-analysis on similarity show us
did a meta-analysis of actual and perceived similarity, showed that they both matter in liking other people (if we think we are similar and if we are actually similar)
what did Van Zalk and Denissen research about new high school students and college students find
-had people fill out surveys and followed them throughout the course of the year, looked at if the likelihood of people becoming friends predicted how similar they were in personality (self-rated and by people who knew them)
results: people who had similar demographics and personality were more likely to become friends later, dissimilar individuals are unlikely to be friends
- new high school and college students with similar demographics and personality (as rated by people who knew them) were more likely to become friends
what is the matching hypothesis
people pair up with others who are equally attractive (friends, romantic partners, etc)
explain the study on matching people based on attractiveness
- attractiveness of pictures of individuals rated by observers (people who do not know them) on a 1-10 scale, the raters do this without knowing how the people are related to each other in the photos, but the researchers know who is in the photos (might be romantic partners or pairs of friends)
- researchers look at how similar the people in a pair are, compared to a random pair
results: people who are friends or romantic partners are very similar to each other as compared to people who are not in partnerships
what are the explanations for matching hypothesis
1) maybe people look for people who are at the same attractive level as them (10s want 10s, 9s cannot get 10s, so they go to 9s)
2) or maybe people do not even try to go after people who are not in the same league
- research shows that when someone is less attractive in relationships there is a lot of insecurity
what were the activities we did in class that show the matching hypothesis
shown pictures of a person and had to guess which person they were in a relationship with
- majority of people were right about each person they had to guess
- show that we are good at evaluating this, actual similarities relates to actual attraction
shown three couples and had to guess which one got divorced
-majority was correct again
what are the five reasons matching hypothesis happnes
1) dissimilarity is unattractive
2) belief validation
3) smooth interactions
4) likeable qualities
5) beneficial to group living
explain the research in “dissimilarity is unattractive”
we are pulled by similar others and not pulled by dissimilar others
research: pulled people from dating websites and had ratings before and after they first met (how much they liked other person before they actually met, and how much they liked person after they actually met)
- also was a rating on perceived similarity (before and after date: how similar do you think you are to this person?)
results: when perceived similarity dropped after meeting, attractiveness also dropped
(we disslike dissimilarity)
explain “belief validation”
when people are similar to us in values, thoughts and beliefs, it is extremely validating to us
- makes us feel good about the stance we adopt or what we think
- the fact that someone else agrees with me makes me feel better and that i am right
explain “smooth interactions”
it is easier to spend time with and talk to someone who shares the same opinions as we do
- the interactions are better quality and smoother
- it is uncomfortable to talk with people who do not agree with you
- if someone has the same interests as you it is easier for you to talk with them as well (conversation proceeds in a pleasant manner)
explain “likeable qualities”
the traits we have are the traits that we think are correct, so we like them in someone else
-whatever we believe, we think is the right belief and when someone else has the belief or value, we like it
explain “beneficial to group living”
spending time with people who can have easy interactions with us is in the benefit of harmonious group living
- humans survival strategy is social living, working cooperatively to be better as a group that individuals
- in order to do this: we have to get along (group living and cooperation does not work if there is dislike)
having shared values and smooth interactions makes it easier for people to get along which increase cooperation
also, when someone is similar to us we feel like we can predict them (know their behavior)
-the sense of not knowing is unpleasant
what is proximity vs. propinquity
- Propinquity is how frequently and easily we can come in contact with someone
- Proximity is physical closeness
- *these both influence the development of a relationship**
- research shows that the people we end up in relationships with are the people we come in contact with frequently
explain the Festinger et al study about the apartment building and how it shows Proximity/Propinquity
research using graduate school housing, many individuals already had relationships, surveyed the people who lived there “Do you have any friends in this complex?” (looked at people who said they were friends and where they lived relative to each other)
results: 65% of peoples friends lived in the same building (17 total buildings), 41% of next door neighbors indicated they were close friends, 10% of people who lived on opposite ends were friends (proximity)
- more likely to say friends lived in close building and when apartments are actually close to each other
also, people who were living near stairs or mailboxes were the most popular in being described as a friend (if someone’s apartment was located near a place where people were likely to pass by frequently people were more likely to consider them friends- propinquity)
what was Brown’s example of propinquity
She lived in St. Louis in a tight neighborhood (small houses) most houses had porches, across the street two sisters owned a duplex (always outside, liked to garden and had a cat), very extroverted and talked to people as they walked past, she was at a car place one day and told a man where she lived and was asked if she knew the sisters (Mary and Elizabeth), -the mere fact they were physically available (outside all the time) increased the likelihood that people knew them and liked them
Having a dorm or apartment way back in the corner is kind of lonely, prevents people from coming by and can have an inhibiting effect on relationships
what is the Propinquity effect
functional distance
-some locations are more functional than others
why does the propinquity (3 reasons) and proximity occur
availability, anticipation, and mere exposure and familiarity
