Infidelity Flashcards
What is the most recently cited cause for divorce?
Infidelity
What are some of the feelings experienced by the “injured partner”?
Rage, overwhelming powerlessness, victimization, and abandonment
What are some of the feelings experienced by the “participating partner”?
Depression, suicidal thoughts, and acute anxiety
What are the authors’ three-stage affair-specific intervention?
Stage 1: Dealing with the initial impact.
Stage 2: Exploring context and finding meaning.
Stage 3: Moving on.
What is involved in stage one: Addressing the impact of an affair? What are the therapeutic components? What does the therapist need to do?
Therapeutic components include a) boundary setting, b) self-care techniques, c) time out and venting techniques, d) emotional expressiveness skills and discussion of the impact of the affair, and e) coping with flashbacks.
It is important for therapists to avoid getting lost in the chaos of the partners’ own emotional turmoil; this requires slowing interactions, keeping discussions focused on the most urgent or immediate decisions, and containing negative exchanges during sessions.
What is involved in stage two: Examining context?
Therapeutic components include a) exploring factors potentially contributing to the affair and b) constructing a shared narrative.
Therapists find the root of the affair, interviewing each partner and encouraging them to speak about their sides of the story.
What is involved in stage three: Moving on?
Therapeutic components include a) discussion of forgiveness and b) exploration of factors affecting their decisions to continue their relationship.
It is important that therapists do not try to bring about their own preferred outcome and also that they do not abdicate responsibility for ensuring that all relevant information is considered by both partners in pursuing a thoughtful decision about how to move on.
