Girl

Question 1

What line do you walk in on? (And side)

Answer 1

“So… Once upon a time…” (STAGE LEFT)

Question 2

Narrator 1: Anyway, there way a girl.
Narrator 2: And she was poor.

Answer 2

Oh I am poor

Question 3

Dirt Merchant: Dirt for sale! Dirt for sale! Hey, you! Get off the merchandise!

Answer 3

Crying
I shall flood the ground with my tears!

Question 4

Dirt Merchant: You’re getting it wet! Stop it!

Answer 4

If only I could live in a boot or make some deals with elves or find a talking fox

Question 5

Enchantress: Excuse me, I couldn’t help overhearing your tale of misery and woe. Tell you what, I will grant you your heart’s desire if you give me one small thing.

Answer 5

That sounds like a great bargain. I won’t even ask what the small thing is because I’m so trusting!

Question 6

Enchantress: I vanish again!

Answer 6

What a nice lady!

Question 7

The Devil: Hey there hot stuff. Oh wait, that’s me. Ha ha ha!

Answer 7

Are you a prince?

Question 8

Of darkness. Laughs at his own joke Oh that’s clever! Now, I happened to overhear your tale of misery and woe and I’m here to help.

Answer 8

Well actually I just-

Question 9

The Devil: just sign this one small contract and you shall can see if a daughter so beautiful she will be selected to be in a game show with 22 other attractive women competing for the love of-

Answer 9

Done

Question 10

The Devil: Moo ha ha ha ha

Answer 10

This is a busy street

Question 11

Rumpelstiltskin: Hello there.

Answer 11

YOU’RE HIDEOUS AND DEFORMED

Question 12

Rumpelstiltskin: that’s hurtful, but I have a great bargain for-

Answer 12

My stomach recoils in horror as you approach!

Question 13

Rumpelstiltskin: I get that a lot, but-

Answer 13

Why has god’s creation been so perverted?!

Question 14

Rumpelstiltskin: do you wanna hear my offer or not?

Answer 14

Sure, go ahead. You’re probably trustworthy and I’m stupid and I shouldn’t judge people by their appearances

Question 15

Rumpelstiltskin: I shall make you rich, rich I tell you! Rich Beyond your wildest dreams!

Answer 15

Really? Because I have some wild dreams. “Hand MY WILDEST DREAMS book over”

Question 16

Rumpelstiltskin: This is really messed up. You seriously need help. A lot of work has gone into this and it’s disturbing.

Answer 16

I also want a jet fighter with Tom Cruise in it- when he was 23 and not into the weird stuff.

Question 17

Rumpelstiltskin: He was still into that. He just wasn’t advertising.

Answer 17

I want a Tom Cruise clone then. One that I control.

Question 18

Rumpelstiltskin: I shall make you rich. Not rich enough to afford a jet fighter or to steal a skin graft from a famous actor and grow a clone in a vat, but rich enough! And I ask only one small thing in return.

Answer 18

Sounds good.

Question 19

Rumpelstiltskin: Don’t you wanna know what the small thing is?

Answer 19

No I’m good

Question 20

Prince: Hey you’re hot

Answer 20

I am hot!

Question 21

Prince: Let’s get married!

Answer 21

Score!

Question 22

Prince: Hey I just tripped over a giant pot of gold! What are the odds?

Answer 22

HA HA! SCORE!

Question 23

Prince: Woah. How did that happen?

Answer 23

Ummmmmmmmmm…

Question 24

Prince: I’ve always wanted a baby. Let’s go back to my kingdom.

Answer 24

What are you the prince of anyway?

Question 25

Prince: Here we are in Denmark

Answer 25

It’s terrible here

Question 26

Prince: Ha ha yes…

Answer 26

THE BABY IS COMING!

Question 27

Prince: I want to revisit the name Rapunzel. What about Amber?

Answer 27

That was the name of your ex-girlfriend!

Question 28

Rapunzel: Shut up

Answer 28

Honey, we’re going to have dinner so wash your hands

Question 29

Rapunzel: I don’t care. I didn’t ask to be born! I’m going out.

Answer 29

You’re not walking out of this house, young lady!

Question 30

Rapunzel: I do what I want. You don’t know me.

Answer 30

I’m your mother!

Question 31

Rapunzel: Real winner you chose there, Mom.

Answer 31

You don’t have a lot of time to be choosy when you fall in love at first sight.

Question 32

Rumpelstiltskin: “Really long paragraph” and then here I was, right at your house?

Answer 32

What do you want?

Question 33

Rapunzel: MOM?!

Answer 33

What.

Question 34

Rapunzel: How many deals did you make?

Answer 34

Just three. And I may have promised your hand in marriage to be talking rabbit. What, I was young, I needed the money - and the baby - and the prince - but mostly just the money and the baby

Question 35

Rapunzel: This is why I’m in therapy!

Answer 35

Oh honey you’re not in therapy because of my deals, you’re in therapy because we’re terrible parents

Question 36

Rumpelstiltskin: Girl, if you can guess my name, I will release you from our bargain.

Answer 36

It’s Rumpelstiltskin

Question 37

Rumpelstiltskin: WHAT?!

Answer 37

It says it right there on your name tag.

Question 38

Rapunzel: Mom, let’s get out of here!

Answer 38

Quiet honey I’m watching this. Go Devil!

Question 39

Enchantress: I’ve got this great tower for you.

Answer 39

Run along dear

Question 40

Rapunzel: But Mom, I don’t want to go with the evil Enchantress.

Answer 40

Yeah and I didn’t want to raise a spoiled brat, but sometimes you don’t get what you want. Unless you make a deal with the devil and some other weird people. See you.

Question 41

Prince: I’m back from my golfing trip! What did I miss?

Answer 41

The forces of darkness battle it out for our daughter’s soul

Question 42

Prince: Cool. You want to go to Hawaii?

Answer 42

Rock on (EXIT STAGE LEFT)