General Therapy

Question 1

3 ways of turning vague therapy goals into concrete steps

3 ways you can break down large therapy goals (like coming out of depression) into small goals

Answer 1

1. use client’s metaphors to help them take the right steps
2. keep the ball rolling and keep it rolling
3. creating a life manual

Question 2

we tend to _________________

and ____________ through emotions

Answer 2

intellectualise, think our way

Question 3

Emotions are fundamentally _______________

Answer 3

physical
what sensations are present in your body?
be curious
how would you describe it?
hot, cold, comfortable

Question 4

At the core, anxiety is a state of being ________________ in your body. Not feeling at home in yourself and wanting to be anywhere else. It’s the fear of a ______________ and only a problem when your ____________ say you can’t have it.

Answer 4

uncomfortable, feeling, rules

Question 5

4 principles from mindfulness

Answer 5

1. beginner’s mind; be curious
2. describe, don’t judge - being non-judgemental
3. non-striving - not trying to change - not even subtle events
4. be here now - present moment awareness

Question 6

when big emotions come
you give them ___________ by getting into your body
__________ down
allowing yourself to ___________ what you are feeling

Answer 6

space, slowing, experience

Question 7

two things a therapist will do in a session to help you feel your feelings

Answer 7

1. where do you notice that in your body?
   someone giving intense description about their bosses, mother etc.
   hands are cold, throat is tight, heaviness in chest
2. can you use an emotion word?
   C: they never listen to me
   they are just so rude
   T: question 2
   C: I feel angry
   T: yeah that’s an emotion word
   (but anger is a secondary emotion, so I might say)
   T: is there more sensitive under that
   C: I am afraid
   T: of what
   C: I feel inadequate, helpless
   deeper feelings

Question 8

when we identify a feeling in body
we are _____________ it - yes I am feeling this
and because emotions are ______________ - they are trying to tell us something
when we notice and name them
they don’t have to ______________ to deliver their message
they often resolve just by being _________________

Answer 8

validating
messengers
shout
acknowledged

Question 9

work to be done
not just ____________ recipient of therapy

Answer 9

passive

Question 10

use client’s metaphors to help them take the right steps

Answer 10

where should you get metaphors for therapy from?
classic ones are there
but often from client themselves
C: i’ve broken down to pieces
T: okay, it takes time to assemble pieces that have fallen apart

Question 11

keep the ball rolling and keep it rolling

Answer 11

client hoping to make more social connections
what one thing can you do this week which will make it more likely to make more connections?
if they don’t come up with anything, you can make suggestions
like emailing a friend not connected with for a while
the more ideas they can generate the better
just one small thing
if they do each of those a week, it is really good

Question 12

creating a life manual

Answer 12

they say life doesn’t come with instructions
but it does
instructions come from experiences, parents, schools, books
attitudes, ideas, beliefs, values are all instructions
some people’s instructions help them
some’s obstruct them - limiting beliefs
we can use this metaphor to put it to good use

thought experiment:
writing an instruction manual
like wanting to find a woman to be happy with
T: how will you do that?
C: I am hoping it will happen some day.
T: write a manual for young men hoping to find a woman they can be happy with
where would you start?
C: let’s define happy
it’s about feeling relaxed with the person
T: what sort of practical steps do we need to put for a guy who wants to meet such a person
C: you could meet more people if you could make social invitations
joining a gym
a more sociable job
learning how to relax around women
learning grooming

Question 13

Therapy is a ___________ finding mission, not a ____________ finding mission.
It’s about changing your relationship with _____________.
Not having __________ change.

Answer 13

fact, fault, yourself, others
Not blaming your parents for what you didn’t get.
That’s not what therapy is about.
But noticing what got missed and now giving it to yourself.

Question 14

Actions to do when feeling
anxiety:
sadness:
loneliness:
overwhelmed:
stress:

Answer 14

breathing/relaxation
an activity you enjoy
helping others/volunteer
break down your tasks
set boundaries