Attraction, Love & Intimacy Flashcards
What is reciprocity in terms of relationships?
A mutual exchange. The idea is that we are always calculating what we are giving/gaining in what ever sort of relationship. If we feel we are giving too much, we will shut down/cut people off.
What is infatuation?
Intense absorption in or focus of another person. Sexual desire, elation, general psychological arousal or excitement, passion.
Secure infants seek what?
Proximity or contact or else greet the parent at a distance with a smile or wave.
Explain Anxious-ambivalent infants.
They don’t explore. They either passively or actively show hostility towards the parent, and seem confused about their feelings towards them.
Explain anxious-avoidant infants.
They don’t explore, yet appear to want little from the parent.
Explain disorganized infants.
Not consistent in ways of relating to their caregiver. Often off behaviors in response to stressful situations.
What is attachment theory?
Possible template for love, relationship to mother serves as a template for future relationships in general.
The attachment theory can provide what?
It can provide a framework for understanding emotional reactions in infants.
Attachment theory can also help how with adults?
It can help us understand love and loneliness in adults.
Explain secure adults.
They find it easy to get close to others and are comfortable depending on others and having others depend on them. Secure adults don’t often worry about being abandoned or about someone getting too close to them.
Explain anxious ambivalent adults.
They find that others are reluctant to get as close as they would like. They often worry that their partners don’t really love them or won’t want to stay with them. They want to merge completely with the other person, which may scare them away.
Explain anxious avoidant adults.
Are somewhat uncomfortable being close to others. They find it difficult to trust others completely, difficult to allow themselves to depend on others. Partners want them to be more intimate than they feel comfortable with.
Explain disorganized adults.
They do not have consistent manners of relating to others in a way to have their needs met. They are more likely to engage in maladaptive ways of coping. Partners may feel confused and frustrated because of their inconsistencies.
What are the components of Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love?
Intimacy, Passion, Commitment. Compatibility can be represented in terms of the congruence of the triangle.
Explain Intimacy.
It is mutual vulnerability. You have to like yourself enough and have enough self esteem, have an identity of your own, think you are likable and deserving of love/feelings from another person, enough to share yourself with someone. Experience of warmth to another person.