5 minute Coaching model

Question 1

5 stages

Answer 1

1. Goal identification
2. Outcome consequences
3. Discovering more
4. Action planning
5. Motivating to Act

Question 2

Stage 1: Goal identification

Answer 2

(WLH) And when …. what would you like to have happen?

Trouble shooting: PRO

And when … what would you like instead?

.

Question 3

What is an outcome?

Answer 3

Stated in terms of “wants”. It is what the person wants, rather than a statement about stopping or remedying the problem, or a statement about what the person doesn’t want.

Outcome statements:

• I want
• I wish
• I’d like
• I’d love

Problem statements:

• I don’t want
• I want to stop
• I hate
• I am sick of
• I can’t

Question 4

Stage 2: Outcome consequences: Choose the best Outcome

Answer 4

(TWH) And when [outcome in coachee’s words], then what happens?

And when [last answer], then what happens?
(Repeat question, with each answer,
until no new answers emerge, the client begins to repeat answers or says stuff like happiness, fulfilled)

And [outcome] and [recap all answers], what are you drawn to most? (want to’s are phrases as are, I want to get more sleep” becomes “And when you are sleeping more, what are you drawn to the most?”

Question 5

Stage 3: Discover More

Answer 5

The coachee has an outcome or goal, has considered the consequences of having it, and decided whether to change or refine his outcome. Now that he’s picked an outcome, your role as coach is to help him explore it further and get a richer understanding of what he wants. This leads to the fine-tuning that’s vital before it becomes clear what the coachee truly wants.

The first three questions focus on a verb:

And when [new outcome], what kind of [word or phrase from outcome]?

And when [last answer], is there anything else about [same word or phrase]?

And when [last answer], where is/are [same word or phrase]? (answer can be in time or space)

This next question is asked about the answer the coachee just gave you, rather than the word or phrase from the outcome. (focus on the place)

And when [last answer], whereabouts [last answer]? And [last answer].

Given what you now know, what would you like to have happen?

Question 6

Stage 4: Action Plan

Answer 6

And what needs to happen for [final outcome]?

And is there anything else that needs to happen for [final outcome]?(Repeat question until you hear first ‘no’)

And [final outcome and recap every action point], and is there anything else that needs to happen for [final outcome]?(Repeat question until you hear second ‘no’)

And [final outcome and recap every action point], and what needs to happen first?

And can [previous answer]?

Question 7

Stage 5: Motivating To Act

Answer 7

And when [first thing], then what happens?
(Repeat until coachee is in a positive state and seems keen to act)

And is that a good place to stop?

Question 8

The coachee asks me for my opinion in the middle of the session. Do I reply?

Answer 8

No. This approach is based on you not influencing your coachee with your ideas and opinions. Shrug, limit your eye contact and keep silent for a little longer than you feel comfortable with. If the coachee still has not responded, then repeat the last answer, ignoring the request for your opinion, and ask your next question.

Question 9

After I ask a question the coachee asks me, ‘What do you mean?’ How do I respond?

Answer 9

As a Five-Minute Coach you never get into dialogue during a session. You’ve already said at the start that you will not answer questions once the session has started. So, hold fire, don’t respond and wait. Most times the coachee finds an answer. If you’ve waited, without direct eye contact and in silence, for a couple of seconds and you feel uncomfortable, then slowly and deliberately repeat the question you just asked.

Question 10

The coachee keeps trying to engage me in conversation by making eye contact. What do I do?

Answer 10

Ask your question. Look away if you aren’t already doing so and keep a neutral expression. The coachee may be looking at you to gauge whether you understand what she’s saying. You know that your understanding of the content is not an important part of this coaching. So keep a poker face!

Question 11

The coachee gets emotional during the session. What do I do?

Answer 11

Sit quietly and wait. It’s important not to be drawn into conversation about the emotion so avoid direct eye contact as much as possible. Count to 10, and if the coachee hasn’t said anything further, ask, ‘And what would you like to have happen?’

Question 12

The coachee says something that is patently untrue, such as ‘senior managers care more about profits than staff’. How do I respond?

Answer 12

Accept the statement at face value, even if you disagree. Continue with your questioning. In this case, since this is probably not something the coachee wants, you ask, ‘And when senior management cares more about profits than staff, what would you like to have happen?’

Question 13

After I ask a question, there is a long silence and the coachee stares into the distance and doesn’t speak. What should I say?

Answer 13

Stay silent and wait patiently. Usually a person staring into the distance is lost in thought. However long it takes to find an answer, give your coachee the gift of space and time to think.

Question 14

As I start to repeat something back, the coachee starts talking again before I have a chance to ask the question. What should I do?

Answer 14

Coachees are really thinking out loud. Since the information is for their benefit, add it to your notes, and then you’re back on track. Repeat the last thing said and ask the question you were planning to ask.

Question 15

The coachee’s answers are really long. Do I have to use everything they say when I ask the next questions?

Answer 15

No. Some people think out loud. So their first words are not their final words (e.g. ‘Well I need to try to talk to … If I could sit down with the team … What I need to do is arrange a meeting and present my ideas’). They’ve just clarified something for themselves. You note down and repeat back the final piece they’ve said: ‘And you need to arrange a meeting and present your ideas’, rather than everything they said. Then ask your next question.
If the long answer is at the end of Stage 3, in response to ‘Given what you now know, what would you like to have happen?’

Question 16

In response to, ‘What would you like to have happen?’ the coachee has asked me to suggest an answer. Now what do I say?

Answer 16

At this point you make a statement, but you do it in a Five-Minute Coach way. So if the coachee says, ‘I’d like you to advise what I should do’, you respond with: ‘And you’d like me to advise. And I can’t advise. And when I can’t advise, what would you like to have happen?’

Question 17

The outcome seems to be out of the coachee’s sphere of influence. How do I respond

Answer 17

Use the ‘And can …?’ question (from Stage 4). For example, respond to ‘I want my boss to be more considerate’ with ‘And can your boss be more considerate?’ If the coachee says ‘yes’, continue to Stage 2. If the answer is ‘no’ or a weak ‘yes’, acknowledge what the coachee wants, and that it’s not possible, and ask for another outcome. You do this by asking: ‘And you want your boss to be more considerate, and your boss can’t be more considerate. And when your boss can’t be more considerate what would you like to have happen?’ When you have an outcome that is within the coachee’s sphere of influence, move to Stage

Question 18

When I ask the question, the coachee just says, ‘I don’t know.’ What do I do?

Answer 18

You still need to ascertain an outcome, and you need to acknowledge that at the moment the coachee doesn’t know. So you ask: ‘And when you don’t know, what would you like to have happen?’ If you hear ‘I’d like to know’ then you have an outcome and can continue to Stage 2 and ask: ‘And when you know, then what happens?’

Question 19

The coachee has answered the question from this stage three times already. How do I know when to stop asking the question?

Answer 19

Only stop when the coachee does one of the following three things:
• Starts to repeat answers.
• Gives answers that include words like ‘happy’, ‘fulfilled’ or ‘satisfied’.
• States clearly ‘That’s it/all’.

Question 20

In response to the question my coachee says something that sounds negative, such as, ‘Then I feel awful!’ Do I continue to ask, ‘And then what happens?’

Answer 20

No. At this point you ask the Stage 1 question: ‘And when you feel awful, what would you like to have happen?’ When you have an answer stating what the coachee wants, continue to ask, ‘And then what happens?’

Question 21

How do I know which word or short phrase to ask the Stage 3 questions about?

Answer 21

it is often useful to ask the questions about a feeling, an action word or a metaphor. Alternatively, select a word that seemed most important to the coachee because it was repeated, or was said with emphasis or more loudly. A tip from experienced Five-Minute Coaches is that short words can be as useful as long words.

Question 22

How to start a session?

Answer 22

Let me explain a little about this coaching.

Explain your role:
My role here is to help you explore your issue, work out what you want and how you are going to achieve it. I won’t be offering you ideas or suggestions as to how to do it. You’ll soon find that this isn’t like a normal conversation or even any coaching session you may have had before. I won’t look at you much and I won’t make any suggestions or comments about what you say.

Confidentiality
I will be taking notes to help me remember what you say. And, at the end, I’ll give you all the notes.
Anything you say is confidential unless it’s illegal or unsafe.

Unusual Questions:
If I ask you any questions that seem unusual or odd, just answer with the first thing that comes to mind.

Won’t be answering any questions:
Once we start, I won’t be answering any questions as that will interrupt the flow. So … is there anything you’d like to ask me now?