Week 7- Betrayal trust and forgiveness Flashcards
What is the key to betrayal?
Violated expectations
What is the percentage of divorce due to infidelity in western countries
25-50%
What are the four types of betrayal
accidental
romantic
marital arrangement
philandering
What percentage of people have lied to their partners
70%
Why do people betray?
mitigating (humble, sincere, sorry);
mostly mitigating but some excuses
defensive, use of justifications
aggravating – denial, no responsibility
What do victims prefer for accounts of betrayal?
Mitigating rather than aggravating
How should youapologise to a betryala?
Redress power imbalance but must be sincere
Why is guilt and remorse important?
They are essential for foregiveness to occur. sign of caring, motivates relationship repair, serves as a down payment for victims distress
What are the functions of revenge?
Resotre self esteem, power balance and motivate behaviour change
In terms of foregiveness research, what does accomoodation do?
Linked to commitment and investment in relationship.`
What did the study on betrayal by fitness indicate
Differences in self- versus partner perspectives. Self is more excusing
What are the main thoughts as to why you dont forgive a sorry partner?
Offence just “broke the rules” (20%) Betrayal severity (80%) How could someone who loved me do such a thing?
Reasons as to why you forgive a not worry partner
Extenuating circumstances (40%)
Passage of time (30%)
Sake of relationship (22%)
Love (8%)
What was found from the food study
Participants in betrayal condition gave significantly more hot sauce to partners than participants in control group
Some participants explicitly took delight in doing so
Women punished more severely than men
Degree of punishment was influenced by relationship happiness
what does trust require?
Predictability, dependability, faith
